Blood Must Have Blood (Clexa Fanfic)

Knocking on Heaven's Door

Clarke awoke slowly, her eyes still weighed down with sleep as she struggled to shake away the nightmare that had gripped her. Her skin felt cold and she shivered in the cold night air as she looked around the bedchamber. Suddenly everything flooded back to her but at the forefront of her thoughts was Finn.

He seemed to haunt her dreams, ever since that fateful day when she had driven the knife into his chest and felt tears stream down her face as he told her he loved her. All she could do was watch as he took his last breath. If only it'd been her...if only she could've stopped Lexa and told her to take her instead of Finn. Maybe things would be better if she was dead. Everyone else seemed to think so. The part that hurt the most was that deep-down, Clarke knew she'd loved Finn too.

She looked up and could almost see his silhouette behind her tears as she blinked them away and brought her knees up to her chest. She could still hear his breath in her ears, soft and gentle and the subtle pang in her heart every time she was in his company. But it was a feeling she knew she'd never feel again. Not now that Lexa had taken away the only person she'd truly loved away.

"Blood must have blood." She whispered, over and over to herself as she imagined Lexa saying the same words. Clarke rocked herself back and forth, unable to contain her angst as her longing to see Finn grew and she was on the verge of tears again.

"Why not me?" She whispered. "They could've taken me, I've killed more than Finn ever did..M-Mt Weather.." She gasped, unable to stop herself crying now as she remembered pulling the lever and condemning thousands of innocent people to death. People who had helped her. Children who had barely begun to live. Her hands knotted into her hair and she sobbed into her knees, whispering the names of the people that hated her for everything she'd done.
Raven...Bellamy...Octavia...Monte...
Jasper...Mom..

Everyone she'd ever cared about was as good as dead to her now as she sobbed, alone in the bedchamber. The mighty Wanheda reduced to nothing more than a shivering wreck.

She sat alone for a few moments like this, wrapped inside herself in the bleak silence before she felt another presence outside the door and she flinched, sitting up straight and cowering a little. Being the former leader of the Sky People had meant her life was a valuable thing and many wouldn't hesitate to take it. She didn't trust the Grounders, not anymore. Maybe she had once, but they were an unpredictable and brutal people.

"G-go away.." She snarled but her voice quivered and she pushed herself up in bed as the door opened and her eyes met the face of a figure she recognised.
She swallowed as Lexa walked into the chamber, closing the door behind her and leaning against it. Her frame was broad and it was obvious that she'd earned the title of Commander through combat on many occasions but at the same time, the way her hands rested gently on the doorframe showed femininity and the way she looked at Clarke showed a slight tint of worry.

Although Clarke just scowled at Lexa, knowing full well how harsh those eyes had looked when Finn had died. When she'd given the order for him to suffer the pain of the deaths he'd caused. It hadn't been that long after that Clarke had been apprehended for killing Finn by the onlooking Grounders. They had all seemed shocked, but not Lexa. She remained still and her eyes as cold as ever. She rarely showed emotion and Clarke hated it. How badly she wanted to make the Commander flinch, or wince, or frown. But she did none of those things. Sometimes it was like Clarke could never surprise her at all and she was just as predictable as a child.

"Get out." Clarke snapped "I'm not in the mood."
Lexa met her gaze with a harsh glare that would have sent a shiver down the spine of any Grounder. But Clarke had lost everything already, she had no more room for petty fear. Ever since the Commander had brought her here Clarke had felt nothing but resentment for her and that wasn't about to change.

"You don't have a choice on whether I stay or not Clarke. From one leader to another, I suggest you mind your tongue." She said and Clarke just glowered.
"I'm no leader. Not anymore..That part of me died in Mt Weather along with everyone I ever cared for." She retorted, getting angrier now.

Lexa just surveyed the girl, her arms folded behind her back. Even now, dressed in the most simple nightclothes and bare-footed she still looked every bit as menacing. Somehow she managed to look so calm as she sighed and came to sit on the bed beside Clarke, although her posture was still straight and her eyes fixed.

"You're crying." She commented and Clarke brought a hand up, feeling hot tears on her cheeks and she wiped them away wishing she could do the same with the brown-haired girl in front of her.
"It's nothing." She snapped "Leave me alone Lexa."
"Well it clearly isn't nothing if you're crying over it. Pain is weakness Clarke, love is weakness. This is about Finn isn't it?"
Clarke's eyes widened at how accurate the Commander was and before she could nod, Lexa was already frowning.

"It's been almost a month now. People die, you move on. Otherwise how else can you be a good leader to your peopl-"
"They aren't my people anymore Lexa!" Clarke cried, her voice aching from little sleep.
"You of all people should know that. I don't even know why you're keeping me here, why don't you just kill me already?" She said, her voice serious and for the first time Clarke could've sworn she saw the Commander's eyes flicker.

"Because Clarke. If you haven't noticed there's a large bounty on your head. A lot of people want the power of Wanheda and the only way to get that is by killing you." She said, standing up again now.
"So you're...what exactly?" Clarke sighed "Protecting me? Well if that's the case then you'd have better luck with someone who cares about dying. Because right now? Death doesn't seem like a bad option Commander." Clarke said icily and Lexa just looked like she'd received a slap. In a moment her usual facade was back and she glowered back at Clarke, heading back towards the door.
"Oh trust me. I'm far from protecting you Wanheda." She said in the same icy tone before she opened the door again and slammed it behind her in a way that made Clarke jump.
She was a little surprised at how Lexa had reacted. It almost seemed too emotional for her, too angry.

The slight meeting with Lexa hadn't made Clarke feel any better. There was no way she could just move on from this. After all, she'd loved Finn...she still did. And now she was forced to live with the same person who had ordered his torture. Clarke could barely cope anymore and she wanted so desperately to disappear. To get away from everything, especially Lexa...

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Sorry there isn't much Clexa in this Chapter, I plan to get more into the swing of things later on, this was just a basic starter idea that I had :3 So yeah, hopefully there'll be more coming soon.