Not Everything is Left Unspoken -Larry Stylinson-

Chapter Twenty-Three

Harry's P.O.V

I wanted the scratches on my back gone. I want the label on my wrist gone. I want all of the memories from yesterday gone. I can't deal with this. Maybe if I go on twitter, the fans can cheer me up a little bit. I doubt it.

marsya .x @Living1Derland

My friend took a picture of Harry leaving out of this alleyway between a convenient store and a movie theater yesterday morning. This is scaring me guys because he has dirt all over his face and his shirt is on backwards and he had some dried blood on his hand. He didn't have any kind of emotion.  THIS IS SCARING ME HERE'S LINK

pic.twitter.com/821QE37tt25e

I went scrolled past the tweet, feeling like I should scrub my skin off from the night. I found the replies for the tweet and I hesitantly clicked on one. 

d o n u t s @elannanguyen

Maybe he was desperate to have some sex and then the old hag got STD's and dumped the piece of shit that he is.

I kept reading through the tweets of hate and love from fans and haters. Tears were streaming freely down my face. Am I that worthless? Maybe I deserved what happened to me. Maybe I should've just died in that alleyway with my wrist bleeding from the sinful word. I looked at the deep cuts in my wrist as I sobbed quietly. 

I shouldn't have a boyfriend. I shouldn't be in this band. I shouldn't even be here. The negative thoughts kept filling my mind as I heard the door open. "H-Harry? I want to talk to you." I heard the voice I love say to me. 

The door closed and I felt feet heading my way. My heart started beating fast. He hates me. He doesn't love me. He wants to be with Eleanor. He loves her more. Nobody loves me. I'm disgusting. He knelt down in front of me.

"Harry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for cheating on you. I'm sorry for keeping away from you. I'm sorry I went behind your back and doing those horrible things. I didn't find it good, I just wanted something to do and you didn't fully forgive me. If you're like this because of me. I'm sorry for everything! I just didn't know what to do! I'm so sorry." I didn't know what to say. Should I forgive him? 

He shook his head and looked down as a tear slipped out of his eye. My face was stone hard, with no emotion showing at all. I took my thumbed and wiped the tear away. He jumped at me, wrapped his arms around my waist tightly. My heart started pounding and I pushed him away from me. His arms were right where the guy's arms was. He always kept grabbing my waist to make me stand still.

My breathing got heavy at the memory. I scooted away from him to the top of my bed and hid my face in my hands. "H-Harry? Why are you doing this?" I shook more and more and curled up into a ball. I ran a hand through my hair and he gasped.

"Harry! What the actual fuck is on your wrist?!" He shrieked at me. More tears came into my eyes as I remember how I was nearly unconscious from him hitting my head. And then he grabbed something and poked it with my wrist. That's all I remember before I blacked out. My eyes went wide as I looked at Louis.

He grabbed my limp arm and looked at the true word. "Who did this?! Tell me now, Harry! What happened that night?!" I couldn't say it. If I said it, he would be disgusted with me. He would think I'm a slut. He would break up with me.

Then my mind went back to earlier in the kitchen.

I walked down the stairs, my back stinging like crazy. I entered the kitchen and everyone is trying to hug me. It was too overwhelming. I pushed them away and yelled. I didn't even know what I was yelling at them. I start sliding down the wall and pulled on my hair.

I whispered to myself. "I want to die. Nobody loves me. I'm worthless. I hate myself." I suddenly got up and ran upstairs. I was afraid that they would hurt me like that guy did. 

I felt somebody shaking me. I looked at him and my stare turned cold. "I SAID NOBODY FUCKING TOUCH ME! GET AWAY FROM ME! GET OUT OF MY ROOM AND STAY OUT! DON'T COME IN HERE EVER AGAIN! NONE OF YOU COME NEAR ME!" I screamed, getting up and pushing him to the floor. 

I stared daggers at him until he scrambled up and quickly got out of my room. I sat back down on my bed and pulled on my hair roughly. 

Only four words were stuck in my head. 

I want to die.

But I don't want to let the boys down. I sighed and made my way to the washroom that was located in my room. I need to take a shower again. I feel disgusting. Like always. I'm just a fag.

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So how did you guys like this?! It made me cry!! I am dedicating this to @Hazza_xo_Tommo!! And I got the actual twitter names from Directioners!! So the one that had the negative comment isn't a hater!! She is a directioner and I just randmomly got her name to here!!

I cannot wait for the end of the year!! haha!!!

Love you guys! Xxx