For Better or For Worse (Book 2)

About a Thousand Times

I've loved you for a thousand years and I'll love you for a thousand more.
—Christina Perri

We all sit outside at the ancient picnic tables placed at random on the big hill. It's almost midnight, and I don't think it could possibly be any darker. I'm having trouble comprehending how Shawn knows the two new boys, but he seems to know everything about them.

They talk and talk and talk for what feels like hours, just laughing and catching up. Apparently, they've been best friends since they were six and Shawn had moved away when he was thirteen years old. Now that I know they'd been apart for four years, I am awed by how easily they still converse, how well they get along with each other even after all those years of being separated. That's real friendship.

For the first hour, I feel bad for Tyler and Cameron, who sit at the table whispering to each other, the other boys completely oblivious to their existence. But then, when their reuniting comes to a slight lull, Shawn's face lights up and he introduces them to each other.

I can't help but notice that he introduces Tyler as his best friend, obviously not afraid to tell Jack and Nash that he has sort of replaced them with Tyler. I can tell by the happiness in Tyler's face that it earns Shawn a couple of extra brownie points on the forgiveness chart.

They seem to be doing okay, considering how big Shawn's mistake had been. I am glad they are gradually making their way back to their old, adorable relationship.

Shawn and I are a different story. It's still always slightly awkward between us and that makes it all the harder to forget what he did. But he is so sincere that it is difficult not to completely forgive and forget. I just have to be careful, knowing that I can't fully trust him anymore, which hurts me more than I let on.

A while ago, he was the only person I would've trusted with my life, besides Zac of course. And now I'm sure what to tell him and what to keep to myself. Choosing what I can share with him is very depressing, but I have to save myself the heartache of ever being hurt like that again.

"Skylar."

"Sky!" Shawn's voice is the one that snaps me back to reality, and I temporarily wonder is that's coincidental.

"Oh, sorry," I answer, shaking my head to clear my thoughts. "What's up?"

Jack smiles gently. "We are going to camp out at Shawn's house. You wanna join?"

I'm a little hesitant, considering it would be me and possibly five boys, so I turn to Sierra. She nods, looking ecstatic at the prospect of a slumber party.

Well if she's going. "Yeah, why not."

Tyler grins and Shawn studies him suspiciously, questioning his excitement.

"Lemme just call Zac." He left when we had all sat down to talk, knowing he had early classes the next day.

Tyler puts a hand on my arm. "I already did."

I raise my eyebrows, but nod and follow the boys to the car. Sitting in between Jack and Sierra, I'm slightly squished in the way back.

As soon as we start the long drive, Sierra falls asleep, Tyler and Shawn share earphones, listening to the same music, Cam drives and Nash watches a movie. That leaves Jack and me staring out the window, alone with our thoughts.

"So," he starts cautiously, "how do you know Shawn?"

I suck in a sharp breath, deciding what to tell him and what to leave out. But looking into his deep brown eyes, I want to give him the choice.

"Long story or short?"

Jack flashes a gorgeous smile, and shifts in his seat, crossing his arms and lounging against the headrest.

"We've got a long drive."

So I take a deep breath and begin with the very beginning. "Well. It all started when I moved here from the US..."

A half hour later I have vented everything to him, from meeting Tyler to falling in love with Shawn, to meeting Cam and Sierra, to the horribly months after Shawn's betrayal, and ending with meeting him and Nash at the Haunted House.

When I finish, Jack stares at me intently, obviously engrossed in my story.

"Wow, that's quite the journey." He says, smiling from ear to ear. "I never saw Shawn as the slutty type, so it makes sense that he was only trying to help her."

I smile, knowing he's only trying to redeem his friend. "It's alright, Jack, you don't have to make excuses for him. We're good now."

Jack studies me, his expression unreadable. He cocks his head to the side and wrinkles his cute little nose. "You trust people too easily."

Surprised, I immediately start to object. But then— "What makes you say that?"

He shrugs, looking totally comfortable with his accusation. "Well for starters, I just met you and you poured your guts out to me. And secondly, you forgave Shawn and trusted he'd never do it again."

I'm a little awed at how smart he is, knowing that he'd nailed that statement.

"You're right," I mutter, admitting it for the first time out loud. "You're absolutely right."

He nods, looking at me sadly. "I know. But I wasn't saying not to trust us. Shawn is the best person I know and he really cares for everyone he's close to. He used to look out for me, even in his jerky sense of the word. But he's a great guy and I can tell he's not over you at all."

I'm slightly overwhelmed with all of Jack's observations, but I try to listen as carefully as possible. "You think he still—loves me?"

Jack sighs. "If I know Shawn at all, I know that he doesn't trust easily and that he's never been in love before. He's never loved anyone as much as he did you."

I shake my head, confused. "How do you even know this?"

Jack frowns. "Shawn never told you Nash and me?"

"No..."

"Even though he moved away, we still kept in touch. We FaceTime on the first Saturday of every month. And Shawn talked about you ALL the time."

"Oh," I say, caught off guard by his confession. "Hopefully–"

"They were all good things, don't worry." Jack's eyes lock with mine, and he is obviously very confident telling me these things. "Hey, Jack?"

"Mm?"

"Did he ever actually say that he loved me?" I don't know why I want to know so badly, he had told me personally that he did. But somewhere inside, I need to assure that he had meant it.

Jack looks at me for a brief moment, before glancing away. "About a thousand times, Skylar. About a thousand times."