Consumed By Love (on hold)

Chapter 33>>>

If you don't solve the problems from your past, they will follow you into your future.

Shai's POV

It's been three days since the incident with Theo. The first night, I couldn't sleep in the bed with him, I slept on the couch. I just couldn't bring myself to do it, even if I had forgiven him. The second night I slept in bed with him again, and he held me like it was the first time.

Right now, I'm on the bed working on the last bit of homework I have while Theo gets ready. He's been good with letting me deal, not pushing me to love him like I did before. I still love him, but when my trust is broken.. it takes time to repair.

"You need any help?" I hear Theo ask and I look up from my papers. Theo's standing at the foot of the bed, tying a dark purple tie. His shirt a sleek black, just like his pants.

"I'm almost done, but thanks." I say with a smile. I know he feels bad, he doesn't even have to say the words. You can see it in his face, in the way he looks at me. The way his voice seems strained, as if it's missing something.

"Theo." I say, as he's about to walk back into the closet.

"Hm?"

"I love you." I tell him, reminding him. Making sure he knows that we'll get through this, and that I haven't given up my love for him.

Those three words make him smile. It's the first real smile I've seen in days, it's the smile I've missed.

"I love you too Shai." He tells me before he disappears into the closet.

>>>>

"What do you think you got on that test? It was crazy hard." Charlotte says, and she and I walk out of our class. Going to meet up with Christian for lunch.

"I don't know, I mean it was really hard. I didn't even know half the concepts." I tell her, walking the hall to our lockers.

"Hey, have you met the new kid yet?" Charlotte asks, and I look at her.

"He's in my world history class." She adds.

"No.. who is it?" I ask.

"Oh, some guy. A really hot guy, like oh my god gorgeous--" She rambles on and soon I have to cut her off.

"Do you know his name charlotte?" I question.

"Oh his names--" She stops, making me stop too.

"There he is, isn't he like so dreamy?" She asks, chewing on her bottom lip. I look ahead to a small crowd of blondes, and popular girls. And right smack dab in the middle... Damian Price. The 'new' kid.

"H-h-him?" I ask, wanting to look away but can't.

"Yeah, his names-" "Damian." I answer, not looking at anything but him.

"You know him?" Charlotte asks in disbelief.

"Yes. He's my ex-boyfriend." I say, and bolt away before getting a second more to look at him. Right as I left I knew, I could feel that he finally saw me.

I run to the one place in this school that I know I'll be okay, where I know I'll be safe. When I get there, I shut the door hard. My back sliding down the light wood door.

Hiding my face in my hands, and bringing my knees to my chest I cry. Seconds later, the voice I want to hear speaks.

"Shai?? What's wrong? What happened?" Theo asks, his concern so present it make me want to grab his face and kiss him. But I can't. I can't look up, I can't speak, I can't even move. I'm paralyzed.

After minutes of sitting there, not moving. Not feeling, I look up. My face probably stained with both tears and makeup.

"What happened?" Theo asks softly, and he's knelt down in front of me. Waiting for me.

"He's here." I whisper, barely a whisper.

"Who's here?"

"Damian. Damian Price." I tell him, and look at him in the eyes. Trying to find comfort and safety, and I do.

"That new boy?" Theo asks, confused.

"He's my ex boyfriend." I whisper, and now I can't look at him.

"Why is he here?! I don't get it." I say, and run my palms over my face.

"We broke up, well I broke up with him about a year ago. That day, that Tuesday I thought would finally be the last time I'd have to face him. And now.. he's here." I tell Theo, running my right thumb over my left hand palm, touching the creases in my hand.

"What happened?" He asks me.

"We um, we dated for three years. The first two were great, and I thought I was in love. The last year, he got so mean. So mean." I say, the end becoming a whisper.

"What do you mean... mean?" Theo asks, and he looks upset by this.

"He got verbally abusive, and sometimes would hit me. Punch me. But it was the verbal and emotional abuse I couldn't take anymore, even despite the physical pain." I tell him, and his jaw tightens.

"I had to leave him, and he was so angry. I don't know why he's here, and I--" I can't finish, because the tears begin again.

This time I'm being held by the man who does care for me. Someone I'm positive won't hurt me as much as Damian did.

"I'm so damaged." I whisper into Theo's chest.

"I'm damaged, we're all damaged Shai." Theo says, his chin rested upon my head.

I pull back to look at him, my right hand cupping his cheek. My thumb rubbing over his soft and warm skin.

"And you still love me." I whisper. "Even knowing now that I'm hard to love, and now knowing that I have trust problems with men."

"Even knowing. And everyone has some type of baggage, and troubles they bring into a relationship. I mean, look at me." Theo says, and I laugh lightly.

"I'm not going to hurt you like he did. I know that I did hurt you, and that won't happen again. There's going to be arguments. But I'm not like him. I won't be." Theo tells me, looking me deeply in the eyes. Making me see that he's not lying to me, that he'd never be what I had. His face is stern and serious, but has a way of being soft and assuring all at the same time.

I think it's his eyes that I love the most, this point in time. When he's promising me something, something serious but his eyes can show me all the love and compassion while his exterior is intent.

"I know that." I say.

"My past seems to be catching up with me." I say, my tone light yet making a valid point.

"My past is too." Theo points out, making me smile.

"We'll deal with them together, won't we?" I ask.

"We will. Together." Theo says, bringing me into his arms. In a hug, a feeling inside that only he puts there. A feeling I only feel with him.