Redefining Beautiful

Chapter Four: The Truth Hurts

I walked to school by myself like I normally do. I arrived before the bell rang like I normally do. However, what wasn’t normal was Destiny. I spotted her in the courtyard in front of the gym with three pretty, skinny girls. Usually when I see her with them, she’s just giggling and it’s all small talk. But this was her dancing with them.

Destiny was clapping, and chanting cheers with Megan Peters, Madison O’Neil, and Malia Hevener. I recognized the cheers from the home high school football games Destiny and I attended last semester. This could only mean that Destiny was practicing to tryout for the cheer squad.

“I know we’ll make it.” Megan Peters said confidently as she tied her board-straight, dark brown hair up in a high ponytail. The bell rang, and the three pretty, skinny girls looped their arms through their purses before they floated away saying goodbye to Destiny. I was lamely standing a few feet away waiting on Destiny, so I could ask her what this courtyard scene was all about.

“You’re trying out for cheerleading?” I asked skeptically.

“Yes ma’am.” Destiny slung her Victoria’s Secret Pink bag over her shoulder.

“Why?” I scrunched my face in disgust.

“I told you,” She answered sternly, narrowing her eyes at me. “I’m going to try to have the best high school years.”

Cheerleading is new. Especially for Destiny, the one who referred to this year’s Varsity cheer squad as “sluts that slept with the cheer coach to get on the squad.” It might be a stretch for myself, but I could spend more time with Destiny that way since it truly felt as if she was trying to get away from me.

Before Destiny got too far, I asked, “Do you think I could tryout?” Destiny didn’t even turn around. She just laughed and said, “Yeah, right,” before disappearing into the cluster of other students going to different classes.

At lunch, I saw Destiny with Megan, Madison, and Malia again. I saw that there was no room at the table, but I thought I’d ask to join anyway. Before I approached Destiny, Madison, who was sitting across from Destiny, looked at me for a split second before her eyes darted toward Destiny as if trying to ignore the fact we just made eye contact.

Madison O’Neil, out of the three pretty, skinny girls, has to be the quietest and naturally beautiful of them all. She may not say a lot verbally, but her face shows a gallery of thoughts. I knew when I saw her eyes explode from her sockets toward Destiny after she spotted me, she was thinking, “Uh oh, here comes that fat chick you’ve been trying to blow off. This is about to get awkward.”

“Destiny.” I said timidly. Destiny turned around, speculating my outfit. “I was wondering...” Oh, Gosh. No, that sounded way too lame. “Um, can I sit with you?”

“Sorry, there’s no room,” Megan smiled politely with round silver eyes.

There is no polite way to reject someone, I realized. The one being rejected is always going to feel something whether it would be sadness, anger, hurt, or awkwardness. In this case, I was feeling quite awkward standing there with my tray of high-calorie cafeteria food while the four pretty, skinny girls were installed at a table with light, hearty meals from brown paper bags.

“I’ll talk to you later,” said Destiny as she twisted her body to face Madison again and returned to her granola bar. Just the way she spoke to me then, with no remorse or care, made me think that there was not going to be a later.

My stomach flipped when she turned her back on me, acting embarrassed of the fact I was standing there like a loser wanting to sit with her and her new friends. I was too disappointed to eat, so I stuffed my burrito, Cheetos, Coke, and chocolate nutty bar into my backpack, but secured my cheese stick in the pocket of my sweatshirt in case I got hungry during class.