Redefining Beautiful

Dear Readers,

Let me properly introduce myself. I'm Jayda Louie Cross, but you can call me Louie.

Redefining Beautiful is a book I self-published at 16. Originally, I wasn't going to post it on Wattpad because I worked so hard on it that I wanted to actually sell it. Then, I thought about something. The reason why I wrote Redefining Beautiful was because it was basically an introduction to the kind of author I am. If I didn't show readers over the internet who I was, then how would they be able to connect to me and vice versa? 

So yes. You may read my first book for free. And let me tell you something about it that you may, or may not, have already discovered. 

IT SUCKS. 

I am giving you full permission to critisize the crap out of my first novel, the first story I have ever put my heart and soul into. Because I'm young, because my mind runs in two million AND one directions at a time, I know this book is not the greatest that has fallen from the gods of all things art. I want to get better, and in order to do that, I have to put myself out there for constructive critisim. Which is why I created this Wattpad account in the first place. 

So now that we got all that out of the way. I want to tell you why  I wrote this book. 

First off, ain't it about time someone wrote a book about a "fat girl"?! The real girl image (not the girls you see on magazines that need a cheeseburger) deserve some love! But anyway...

When I was younger, I was the "fat girl". I literally was told how fat I was by my friends everyday at school. But I never saw myself as fat. I knew my stomach wasn't flat, I knew my arms weren't scrawny and that my legs weren't sticks, but I didn't see fat. I saw a girl who was chunky because my body was built differently than most girls. I had a stocky build, and I was tall. But I was okay with it. The only reason why I think I was so okay with the way that I looked is because I had a mother who told me I was beautiful, who told me that it was just an awkward phase, and who made me see beauty in a whole different light. 

Magic happened (puberty) and sports, so I thinned out some in middle school. As I adjusted to my body, I observed a lot of girls who were overweight in middle school. I engaged in conversation with a few of them, learning a lot of the insecurities and thoughts they had, I had. I can relate to not being good enough, to being the girl boys think is ugly, to not loving your body or yourself in general. I became a mother to these girls, solely wanting them to see what my mother had made me see. (You can just call me Mother Lou!)

As I got older, I started seeing the world differently. I had hoarded all these ideas and thoughts to myself for far too long. I was going to write a book to get my opinion out there. My opinion? Society can kiss my white ass. 

Girls (and boys), if YOU don't like YOUR body, then there are steps to fix it. Don't blame other people for the fact YOU'RE insecure when there's things that can be done. And girls, if YOU love YOUR body, then put a middle finger up to the world because it don't matter what size or shape you are, as long as you love you, then ain't nobody can say anthing. 

And that's what is so beautiful about a person. Someone who can look at theirself, love what they see and be happy with it. Yeah, this girl has pretty eyes and yeah, that girl looks good in skinny jeans, but none of it means anything when those girls are beating down other girls to make themselves look good or sleeping around to feel like they're worth something. That's not beautiful. That's sad.

What do I want people to take away from my book?

I want girls to not complain about being overweight and just do something about it or accept it and move on. HOWEVER, only change something about yourself if YOU want to. Just because some girl/guy says something, doesn't mean you got to stop, drop, and roll into a batter of emotional unstability. Us girls need to be strong. I want this book to give girls the courage, or the kick in the uterus, to get you to want to be strong. 

Most importantly, I want girls to stop blaming society for their insecurities because it's not everyone's fault that you don't love yourself. You chose to let things get to you. So stop what you're doing and accept what you have and love it! Be strong. Take care of your body. Love yourself. 

Y'all learned something new about me. Obviously, I'm not afraid to step on some toes. I told some friends of mine that I was going to write a book about a girl who loses weight, and they warned me that it was a fragile subject. But it shouldn't be "fragile" because it's real. There's girls (and/or boys) fighting insecurities whether they're overweight or think that they are, etc. And I just want to reach out to those girls to tell them that society is wrong. This is what beauty is. 

You're beautiful because you believe in yourself, you're beautiful because you love yourself, and you're beautiful because God said so. 

So, with all this being said, I am here for anyone that needs to talk. I love talking to people and giving advice. Don't be shy. I'm really not all that intimidating. 

Be real, 

Louie.