PATIENT LOVE

Chapter thirty-seven

As I'm running away from the crowd I catch the confused looks and I can't even allow myself the time to be embarrassed. I know the music has stopped when my name is being called by Harry.

I don't want him or anyone to see how the tears roll down my face so I keep running, almost tripping with these heels on and almost missing the bathroom entrance. I rush inside, shutting the door behind me and only then do I let the emotions run through me. I allow the sobs and my lack of breath breathing to surround me entirely without a care in mind.

I sit myself down on the couch in the restroom, throwing off heels and grabbing a few tissues to wipe off the ruined makeup as I try to compose myself.

Everything Harry did for me tonight was beyond what I imagined and I love him so much for it but I'm just conflicted and confused. I hold my head in my hands, sniffling softly to myself as the tears have died down.

Rushes of footsteps are the only warning before Harry barges in, finally having found me.

I look up at him and he's out of breath, I can tell by how his chest moves up and down. He looks relieved to have found me but he doesn't approach me all the way, he stays rooted in his spot in front of the door.

After too many beats of silence and my occasional sniffling, he speaks.

"You didn't like the surprise?" his voice vulnerable.

"No, well yes, I loved it...there was a small part of me that was hoping it was you," I say without looking up at him, keeping my eyes focused on the tiled pattern of the restroom.

"How did you even know, how did you do all of this?" I ask, avoiding the real questions I should be asking.

He runs his hand in his hair once. "I had been planning for a while... Jamie mentioned it that morning after our fight... why didn't you ever tell me?" again the vulnerable sound in his voice stabs me.

"I don't know, it wasn't on purpose, I just never thought to bring it up." I say, still avoiding his face entirely.

"Are you going to tell me why you ran off like that?" he asks, finally taking a step closer and I feel my heartbeat change as it speeds up.

"I-I just don't know what you expect from me Harry."

And at that he's in front of me. "Look at me, Madelyn." He takes hold of my hand and crouches down to be at eye level with me.

"Hey, the only thing I expect from you it to listen to me, hear me out." His voice is a whisper from our close proximity.

I nod once.

"I probably don't deserve it but I want to be with you because I love who I am when I'm with you, you woke me up, you Madelyn. And I hurt you, I know that and I hate myself for it but if you agree to be mine again I will spend the rest of my days proving to you that I can be who you need, the guy who won't lie or keep things from you. I want to be the guy who's your best friend, who you trust wholeheartedly without a single doubt, the one who you bring into your bed at night and tell you love to; I want to be that for you."

He's clasping my hands in his so tightly, bringing them both to his lips for a kiss before saying, "please say something Maddie, stop running away from me and come back to me, you know I'll always chase you."

I'm searching his eyes and seeing nothing but truth and love for me and I know I can't be without him, the thought of it is almost unbearable.

"Okay," I say.

"Okay?" his borrow furrows.

"I want you to be all of that for me and I want to be so much for you too, Harry."