Hazel Eyes (A NeverShoutNever FanFic)

Lovers Love Liars Lie

Today had been tiring to the point where I wasn't sure if I should shoot Jane or myself. Plus, having a broken leg made me feel like I was carrying dead weight. Andy and I hadn't talked, which I really didn't care about anymore. Chris was only paying attention to Jane. Hayden & Taylor were always out together with the crew while Chris and Jane were out doing their own thing. Honestly, I'd never been this lonely.

Tonight was another one of those nights and I was being dragged along with Jane and Chris to some club because they "didn't wanna make me feel left out." Too late for that.

"You ready?" I zipped the stupid black thing and shouted a yea before limping out of the bathroom and into the front lounge. "You look hilarious." Jane snorted. "No dude will dance with you." She finished. "I don't think they'd be able to anyway." Chris giggled. I rolled my eyes but they kept going.

I felt like crying. Being made fun of was just one of those things I couldn't handle. Especially if they were in front of me and still doing it and I couldn't do anything.

"We can do the hokey pokey with just the one leg!" Chris burst in laughter as I grabbed my phone and muttered, "Can we just go?" before pushing past them and scurrying to the cab.

I had my back to them in the car. Letting a few tears fall since they couldn't see me anyway.

It hurt. They'd been at it like this for days. It was one thing to see them go without me, but for them to be forced into taking me and then making fun of me at the same time, it was too much.

I sniffled quietly, trying to avoid a confrontation. "Am I right Amy?" Chris nudged my side and I nodded, still avoiding eye contact. "Hey." He tried to get me to turn around but I shook it off and told him to stop. "Okay then."

We got the club and I struggled out of my seat and then watched from outside the cab as they rushed in, again, leaving me behind. I rolled my eyes and walked towards the entrance, showing my ID then trudging into the smell of sweat and alcohol.

Within minutes I wanted to get out there. I grabbed my Marlboro and walked back out, lighting one and then leaning against the wall, taking a huge puff.

I lost count of how many times I'd thought about going home in the last few weeks. At least every other day, I'd make plans to go home and then not do it because I was scared that everyone would think worse of me. This shit was just too much. I seriously thought I could handle this but I can't.

"Are you crying?" Jane's laugh shook me from my daydream of disappearing and turned my attention to her. "What do you care?" I scoffed and turned away to wipe away a few mascara streaks. "I don't, just curious." She shrugged.

"Go home Amy." She cackled and then turned on her heel. "What?" I asked as she stepped away. "Isn't it obvious enough? Nobody wants you here, just leave. Chris could be so much happier on tour without carrying your sorry ass everywhere. Just go." She smirked maliciously and then winked. "Don't talk to me like that.... please." My voice cracked as I spoke the words, trying to hide how much what she'd said affected me. "Don't tell me what to do." She laughed.

She began to walk away again but I grabbed her shoulder and turned her around. "Why do you hate me so much?" I asked. "Get your hands off of me." She growled. "Not until you give me a reason for why you hate me so much." I said. "I can give Chris one." She stated. "What?"

She drew her hand back and slapped me, hard. I stumbled back and then fell to the floor on my ass. "What the fuck?!" I shouted angrily. I kicked up some water from the puddle and it got on her dress. I struggled to my feet and then faced her again. "What the hell is wrong with you?" I hissed.

She pushed me back onto the ground and kicked me, again, very fucking hard.

Screw everything I said about hurting. I'd never felt so much physical pain at once. She kicked me until I heard my shirt tear. When I got up she punched me and then slapped me. I got a few in, maybe two or three. But I'd never been taught how to fight.

When I fell to the floor again she spit and then fake limped away. I got up and called a cab, tears in my eyes.

I heard their footsteps and then blinked hard, trying to get the rest of the tears out before turning around to a furious Chris.

"What the fuck Amy?!" Chris shouted at me with Jane around his arm. "What'd she tell you?" I laughed. "Go home. Like, what the fuck is wrong with you? She hasn't done anything to you and then you just go at her?" I couldn't believe it. "You believe her!" I shouted. "She's been a far better person these past couple of days! You know what, go home." He shook his head and then pulled Jane away.

The cab pulled up just then. "Chris! How fucking blind are you!?" I felt like crying and punching him and hitting myself because I was just so fucking pissed.

I got to the cab, trying to ignore the weird look from the driver. "Uh.. Where to?" He asked warily. I gave him the directions and then sobbed quietly in the back seat.

He actually trusted her. Wow.

We got to the venue and I ran, well tried, to run as fast as I could. I stuffed everything into whatever bag I could find. I didn't care who's it was or if they needed it. I needed to leave. I went to the bathroom to change and only then did I see how bad I was.

My shirt was all dirty and dark with a few small tears in it. When I lifted it I got to see a few darks spots already getting darker. Half of my face was a darkish pink and my lip was a little swollen.

Everything hurt.

I cried as I brushed through my hair and washed my face. I was still crying when I changed and I was still crying when I got back into the cab with my things. And I cried even more when I told him to take me to the airport. I was done.

I didn't know where to go. Truth is, I really didn't want to go. But the pain of staying there and taking more bull shit was more than the pain of not getting to see a few people. He believed her.

After everything.

And I hated myself so much because even as I entered the glass doors and ordered my tickets, I still loved him.