Hidden Feelings | Riren

*Chapter 10*

~ Eren's POV ~

Darkness if known by all as a place for demons, a place of nightmares, a place you should be scared of but to me it's an open, welcoming, second home.

 If you can call where I once lived that. 

The black of night doesn't scare me but makes me feel safe. 

The darkness help's me forget all in which I wish to and brings happiness to my pitiful life. 

Oh how I wish darkness could over run my life forever, but It won't not yet anyway. 

I know I'm awake, but choose to keep my eyes shut. 

I don't believe there is light in someone's darkness, well there might be some but just like the night, the darkness will always come back around and I understand that, now.

It's warm where I am, dark but warm. 

You don't need the sun to be warm you just need whatever is keeping me warm now.

'Wait why am I warm?'

I was about to find out but decided for the best that it stays anonymous, just encase it is to leave me once I found out what is was. Not saying the warmth would leave once I find out what it is but that happens to me so what's the difference?

Everyone leaves me once they find out my name, my life or my story so what's to say that won't happen to this comforting warmth?

"Eren, are you okay?" The voice was familiar but I ignored it and moved my numb body closer to the warm blanket "Hey, what are you doing?"

'Wait I know that voice'

Keeping in the darkness, my safe haven,  I listen moving closer to where the voice was coming from before turning away from it.

"He's probably exhausted, if what you've said is true"

"Do you honestly think I'd lie about that? If you don't believe me look for yourself, that man's an absolute dick and will pay for this"

'Why is the voice so harsh?'

"What's with the sudden change of heart Levi" I feel myself tense yet my body is still no co-operating with me "Oh I see you actually decided to think through what I said, now you've fell for him, bad."

"Stop-"

"Does he know? Was he awake? Did you spill the beans? Does he love you back?"

"No Hanji, for one I didn't tell him, two he probably hates me and I won't go against it and three shut up will you? You're the one tell me he needs sleep and here you are all up in his face examining him as if he's some sort of lab rat"

"Oh Levi, you hurt me"

"Good"

'Levi and Hanji? What are they talking about, not me right?'

"Oh goody look what you've gone and done Levi, you've woken him up"

"Tch, just grab so water or something he going to want it"

The darkness feels as if it's no longer pushing down on me, my sweet haven is leaving me, and taking me somewhere different but where?

There's a gap of white up ahead but I want to turn back yet I can't. 

Something's making me move to it, it's suffocating. 

Stop!

"Shit Hanji! Eren breath fuck sake, breath!"

The voice is overpowering as I back away from it, my eye's heavy but curious to know what's going on. 

And finding out what's going on it just what I do.

"That's it Eren, just focus on my voice. Breath Eren, I know you can do it. You're strong enough. I believe in you so just breath god-dammit"

My body feels awfully calm and relaxed as his voice echos through my ears.

"Good Eren, good, just breath. That's it I'm here just listen to me and you'll get through this okay?" The voice stops then starts again but not pointed towards me but to the other person in the room, Hanji. "For fuck sake Hanji"

'Is he crying?'

"Oh Levi" Her voice is one of a loving mother's "He's okay see? He did what you said he listened to you, you saved him Levi, you saved him. He's alive now because of you"

"We nearly lost him Hanji, he could've died"

"But he didn't, all thanks to you"

That's it now my body and mind wanted to know what was going on so forcefully, tiredly my eyes fluttered open. 

The sleep still in the corner of then along with crust but I wasn't bothered about that now when I heard two gasps and more sobs come from besides me.

Who know's what the reason for my next choice of word where for but it's too late to take them back as they slip from my numb lips.

"Le..Levi"

Even though my eye's are now fully open they can't seem to focus as my breathing comes out in small gasps. 

Well that was until a warm hand overlapped my own.

"It's okay Eren, I'm here, calm down, deep breaths now, deep breaths"

"Levi?"

"I'm here, can you see me" My eyes dart from different places around me until I see a blurred figure looming over me "That's it, that's me, just focus on me okay? You'll be okay, you're safe, I've got you"

"You...safe...got...me?" The question was more for myself as his nice words were mixed with his past mean ones.

"Yes yes, now breath...that's it...well done"

"Warm" I speak out as I moved upwards to where the heat is radiating off only to next be wrapped in the warmth.

"Is that better Eren?" His voice is behind me now, just an inch away from my neck as air tickles my skin. 

That's when I noticed what it was. 

Too tired to argue or fight back I drop my head on to one part of the warm and it tightens itself around me more.

'Such a nice hug'   I think to myself  'The best I've ever had'

My eyes drooping back down a small yawn reaches my lips as Levi laughs still holding me.

"Sweet dreams, Eren"

"Ngh..Sweet dreams...Levi"

My body moved backwards, the heat still around me but the air no longer tickling the back of my neck but this time my forehead right where a loving, soft kiss is placed before darkness coats itself around me again.

"My brat"