dear jiyun » jhs

/29/

160702

dear jiyun,

I hope you're having a good day
and that your smile
is written
on your face

I like the wrinkles
on the corners of your eyes whenever
you're grinning

when you grimace

or get excited

you look beautiful
so beautiful.

you were holding flowers
and looking at the lens

roses, daisies

laughing; overflown with joy

I can almost hear your giggles
playing in my
head

and your high pitched voice
scolding

'“stop it hoseok'”

you repeated
laughing

I teased you
and you didn't disappoint me

threw the white petals at me

they felt like velour

just like your touch
when you run your fingers
on my bare skin

“stop silly”

I would
if I could turn back time.

the picture in my hands

the silky surface helped the tear
roll easily after
it fell

it stained the scenery
as soon as it dried

pictures, so many pictures

arranged memories
on display

every single one belongs
in better times

times that are
gone.

we were pieces that fitted perfectly,
a puzzle of two souls

you filled me in
in every way

I was behind the black camera

always me, to capture
your moves
your carefree poses
your spontaneous reactions
you

why did I take so many?

I had you with me,

as if I knew what was long
to come

as if I didn't try to
stop it

as if I wanted to keep you
with me
forever

immortalized

and it hit me hard like a bullet piercing my guts

my insides crashed
and
torn apart

when I laid eyes on it.

I found our photo album today

full of buried memories
deep inside

tried to let them go
but your smile will not be forgotten

your smile

you were playing around like
the world
belonged to you
to us
like the sky was made of
a thousand colors
and the
rain
was no longer soaking our bodies

like it was washing
our sins away
as it fell on
our holding hands

and I am left here

forming drops more brutal
than the rain
could have sent down.

I found our photo album today

and I wish I didn't.

I will see you again,

hoseok