Demented

Late Night Thoughts

"Do you ever get afraid of the dark?" Gerard asked, looking at his boyfriend.

It was about eleven PM and the boys were spending their time talking. It was pitch black, but a silver light shone through the window, so there was a bit illumination. Andy, their pet rabbit, was drinking water, making hushed noises.

"Sometimes. If I stare long enough and think about what could be out there," he replied.

"Why does dark automatically equal something you should fear?"

"If you can't see it, you fear it. Like God."

"Speaking of God, I'm an atheist."

"That's cool."

"Never been the judgmental type, have you baby?"

"Never."

Gerard flipped his hair back, getting the black strands out of his eyes. He looked out the window and his mind wandered to the thought of his days in Brooklyn.

Gerard moved his way through the school with a demeaning purpose. People eyed him and his friends who followed, too scared to ever utter a word to them.

Gerard found his target behind the corner. He dragged the lanky kid to the bathroom and Gee's friends followed. He kicked him to the ground, making the weak boy gag. Gerard beat the living shit out of him. The target cried and bled. Sixteen year old Gerard was king of the school and everyone knew it. If you messed with one of his friends, you messed with Gerard himself.

The whole gang left. "Little bitch will never mess with you again," he said to his friend, Jeremy.

"So when did you decide you were an atheist?" Frank's voice pulled him back into focus.

"A few months ago."

"Honestly, I've been questioning my faith."

"I read a few books about religions and atheism back during that time," said Gerard.

"Is there any facts to back up the existence of God?"

"None at all. People like to say the bible is proof, but it's not."

"The Bible is illogical. The stories in there, I mean."

"It also supports misogyny, slavery, and murder. Sounds like fun for me, but it's not socially acceptable. So therefore, I know it's wrong."

"The Bible is fucked up."

Gerard shivered a bit, pulling the blanket over himself. "Frank, baby boy?"

"What?"

"Your dependent personality disorder is getting bad."

"I know. I just want you to take care of me all the time," he replied shyly.

"I know, sweetie. It's just not healthy. I can't do it all the time." Gerard pulled Frank in front of himself. Frank was gnawing on his thumb. "You gotta listen to me, okay? It's not good for either of us. You won't be able to do things on your own. That's bad. It's a life skill. Can you take baby steps to become more independent for me?"

"I'll try."

"In the morning, you can brush your teeth without me."

"Okay."

"Think about how proud I'll be of you," Gerard smiled, embracing him.

"I'll do my best for you."

"Your best is great."

Frank disagreed with that. "I'm sorry. I know it gets annoying."

"Don't be sorry, baby boy. I know it's hard for you." Gerard kept him in his arms. Frank played with the bottom of Gee's shirt. He fiddled the fabric in between his fingers.