Gold And Coal (Ryden AU)

1.23 ◇ Affirmation

I opened my eyes and blinked a couple of times, which didn't help my situation because the room remained pitch black.

It took me a couple of seconds until I remembered the events of the night before and suddenly a wave of different feelings washed over me, threatening to drown me.

I couldn't sort them, couldn't even tell if they were negative or positive.

Realizing that Brendon was still curled up in my arms, I gently pushed myself out of his grip and got out of bed, slowly putting one foot in front of the other, hoping I wouldn't bump in to anything.

I needed time to clear my head. And I couldn't do that with this boy clinging to me, messing with my head.

Finally I reached the door and opened it as quietly as I could, and sneaking out.

I made my way downstairs, hoping that no one was around to see their newly employed butler walking around the house wearing pyjamas.

The sun was slowly starting to rise, and I decided to go outside to get some fresh air.

I grabbed the coat Brendon had given me yesterday and opened the door to the backyard, shivering as the cold morning air brushed against my exposed skin.

Sitting down on one of the benches, I stuffed my hands into the pockets of the coat and stared into nothingness, listening to the peaceful sounds of nature.

A soft miow brought my thoughts back and I smiled as a small kitten leaped onto my lap, settling down and kneading it's tiny paws into my thighs and purring happily.

I removed a hand from the warmth of my pocket and stroked it's soft, fluffy, white fur, laughing as it flipped over on it's back and stretched it's limbs.

I had kissed him. He was a boy. It was wrong.

Then why did it feel so right?

"His name is Lou."

I raised my eyes from the adorable little creature to meet Brendon's chocolate brown ones.

"He seems to like you," he went on, taking a seat beside me.

I hummed softly, looking back at the kitten; Lou.

Nothing was said after that, and Brendon joined me in petting Lou, his delicate hands scratching under his chin.

When his hand accidentally brushed against mine, we both froze.

I sighed, gathering every last bit of my courage to form my next words.

"Look, let's not make this any more difficult than it already is. We kissed. It was wrong. But we don't regret it. I don't know what it means anymore than you do."

Brendon gulped and his head sunk slightly as he continued to stroke the cat.

"We can talk about this tonight. It's always easier talking about things at night," he whispered, getting back up and resting his hand on my shoulder for a while.

"Come on, let's go inside."

Removing his hand from my shoulder, he returned to the house. I gently lifted Lou off my lap and set him down on the ground, earning a couple of disapproving miaow's.

I followed Brendon into the kitchen and smiled at Diana who was preparing breakfast.

She abondoned her task as soon as she caught sight of me and made her way over.

"It's good to see you again, Mr. Ryan," she grinned.

"You aswell," I replied, finally accepting the fact that I wouldn't be able to get her to drop the Mr.