Gold And Coal (Ryden AU)

1.2 ◇ Shattered

10 o'clock. It was still raining. Or maybe it was raining again. My clothes were still damp from this morning and I'd prefer not to make my journey in the downpour again.

But nobody cared what I'd prefer. I wasn't important enough.

I was so exhausted I felt like I could collapse any minute. I'd fall to the cold, wet ground. It wouldn't be long before I died there. Nobody would care. Tommorow I will be replaced by another cheap worker. Maybe even a child.

Yet I still dragged my feet forwards, ignoring the fact that I was utterly famished. I was used to it.

I walked and walked and walked. Each step more agonizing than the last. My eyes darted from left to right, keeping a look out for possible opportunities to steal some food, or guys who wanted to do me harm.

Nothing. Not a single scrap of food to be found.

The streets were crowded, an unpleasent smell hung over the district, sewage running through the small alleys, the smell of death lingering everywhere.

Maybe it would be my turn soon. Maybe the smell of my rotting body would make others cover their noses.

But it was no use thinking about that right now. I was still alive. I wasn't dead yet. And right now all I wanted to do was get home.

Luckily I knew this district well enough to know which areas were to be avoided and which alleys held trouble, so I reached home without any problems.

I sighed in relief as I squeezed through the small crack which was the entrance to my home. Although it wasn't much warmer inside, I was at least sheltered from the wind and pelting rain.

"Did 'cha git any dinner?"

He was awake. This day went from bad, to worse, to living hell.

"'m sorry. I couldn't find anything", I mumbled, glancing up to my father, who was looming over me, making me press myself back against the wall.

He had lit a candle, which cast long shadows through the small room. There was a little wooden table standing in the corner, a few empty bottles on top. Two rags littered the floor next to it, where my dad usually slept, when he wasn't passed out somewhere on the streets. And that was it. We didn't have more.

He let out a deep growl, his brown eyes darkening dangerously. He raised one of his huge hands and I closed my eyes, flinching as it made contact with my cheek. My skin burned where he had hit me. But I was used to it.

"Get out! And don't come back until you get some!" He yelled at me, giving me a hard shove against the wall before wobbling back to the other side of the room.

I didn't protest. Of course I didn't. I never did. My eyes stung as I stumbled back out onto the streets. I sunk back against the wall and burried my head into my knees. I wrapped my hands around my legs, curling up in order to keep the little warmth my body had left inside.

I don't kow how long I stayed like that. Curled up on the pavement of a dirty alley, shaking uncontrollably. At that moment, I had lost every will to live.

I lifted my head only when I sensed another presence near me. I tried to keep as still as possible, praying that they wouldn't spot me, until a delightful scent caught my nose. Fish. Who ever was walking through this street was carrying food.

That was the only thought circling my mind. My instincts took over. I watched the dark figure coming closer, slowly getting to my feet.

3.

2.

1.

I pounced out of the shadows, tackling the target to the ground and ripping the basket from it's hands.

There wasn't much resistance, just a terrified squeal.

I was just about to run off when I froze.

"Please don't."

The pleading voice made me stop in my tracks and look back. Only then did I see who I had knocked down. It was a kid. A small girl.

She scrambled to her feet and took a hesitant step towards me.

"They'll kill me", she whispered.

I stared at her. Her ragged clothes hanging loosely from her scrawny frame. I couldn't make out more in the dark, but she wasn't in a good condition.

Then again, neither was I.

She took another step towards me and I backed away, a low growl rumbling through my throat.

"Please", she sobbed, sinking to her knees.

I looked at the basket. Back to her. My stomach growled.

And I ran. Back down the dark street and through the crack in the wall.

I was disgusted with myself. It was wrong. Selfish. I didn't deserve it more than she did. I was a thief. And possibly a murderer.

"Good boy", my father purred the moment I appeared in the room and snatched the basket from me, emptying it on the table.

There was half a fish and a slice of bread inside. Guilt trickled through my skin as I watched him devour the scraps.

He threw the fish tail towards me and I dissapeared into the other room with heavy steps.

Chewing on my dinner, I pulled off my soaked shirt and pants and hung them on loose nails jutting out of the ceiling.

I crawled under the rags and wrapped them around my cold body, falling asleep as soon as my head hit the floor.

I couldn't take this much longer.

The end was closer than ever.

~ All I know is that the end's beginning. Yesterday I died, tommorow's bleeding, fall into your sunlight ~