Onsra (Larina)

Chapter 23

During the rest of my weekend I didn't return the calls to Marina. I just didn't want to hear anything and I doubt she was ready for anything because she never called back.

It's Wednesday and I am not planning to go too school today. Everybody who I loved whether as family, Smarty, or the love of my life, Marina, everyone was slowly leaving my life. The best times I had were slowly just turning into a memory.

My mind was becoming shallow more and more each day. I'm happy my mother worked and I didn't mind her bringing her clients home because I would lock my room.

I then got a call from Chuck...

"Hey Lana, Smarty wanted me to let you know he is leaving this Saturday and we were thinking on throwing him a small party. So I think you should come..."

She just had to remind me and the days were passing by faster than ever that was only in three days from now.

"Uh yeah sure when is the party?"
"This Friday night! Well I gotta go I'm heading to third period." I could hear the bell ring from her school.
"Alright bye."

"Hey Lana I brought some pizza you should come downstairs and get some." My mom said walking inside my room as I ended the call.
"Oh who were you talking to?"
"Just Chuck."
"Oh alright come downstairs there is hot fresh pizza."
"Yeah I'll go down in a bit."

I got up from my bed and put on my sandals.

"Here take a plate La. There's something we need to speak about."
"Oh what is it? If this is about Marina then don't."
"Actually it kind of has to do with that."

As I grabbed the biggest slice of pizza from the box I quickly let the piece fall on my plate.

"La please sit down and eat on the dinning table. Listen Lana all of this has been hard on us and well we need a brand new beginning so I was going to tell you this on Monday but I think right now is a good time to tell you."
"To tell me what?! What's going on?!"
"We're moving into your father's house and living there with Rob and your sister Chuck."
"What?! Why?! We can't I'm almost graduating and I want to graduate from the school I'm in right now and Marina I just can't leave her. I'm sorry but I'm not moving." I said dropping my plate on the table and heading back upstairs.
"Please Lana think about it, this won't be bad for both of us."

I slammed the door.

I must admit I really wasn't upset because I was moving with Rob and Chuck, they're honestly the best and I love them, but I just don't want to move.

Maybe my mom was right we probably weren't meant to be and I should get over but then it hits me that all these years I have loved her and to let go will be so hard.

When it was 4:00 pm I knew Chuck was out of school so I called her.

"Hey Lana calling so quick again." I could hear other people talking in the background.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"That our parents agreed to move to your place." I said angry.
"What-What do you mean? They haven't told me anything..."
"Well now it isn't a surprise."
"How do you know about the switch?"
"My mom just told me but I honestly don't want to leave this neighborhood that I grew up on and Marina. Oh my Marina she would just hate herself for something that isn't her fault and I don't want her to be hurt."
"Yeah I'm sorry for that Lana... I will see what I can do. Maybe I can convince our dad to move to a house nearby or something."
"Alright well I'll see you tomorrow when we start moving things in."
"Okay bye Lana."

After thinking about how the move could be purposeful and actually a good change, I walked into my mom's room.

"Hey mom..."
"Yes Lana?" She sat up and turned off her television.
"...I'm going with you to live with dad and Chuck.."
"Alright well tomorrow we start taking things over there so pack most of your clothes for right now and clean your cabinets out." My mom said excited and smiling. It's the first time in a long time that I see my mom so happy and I didn't want to ruin it.

I grabbed my clothes off the rackets in the closet. My pants, my shirts, my shoes, and my dresses were all in my baggage.

Once I saw how empty my closet was I noticed a paper tapped to the end of the closet. The writing looked like my middle school writing and it read:
'Attract Marina!'

I smiled at the note and ripped it off and threw in the trash. My young self was so obsessed with her.

As look deep into my cabinets notes and drawings, that I never thought of sending or giving them personally to Marina, were all shoved inside and some even crumpled up.

I sat on the floor with a good bunch of notes since I the first week I saw Marina enter the classroom and being introduced by the teacher.

I read them all as I slowly laughed, smiled, cried, and even felt embarrassed at what I had wrote about Marina.

My mother walked in again as always into my room without even knocking.

"Hey La, honey, I think it's time you sleep were going to wake up early tomorrow." I sniffled as I dried my tears off from eyes.
"Oh yeah sure mom, I was just finishing cleaning my cabinets."
"Lana is everything alright?" She asked as I got up and threw the notes away.
"Yeah." I said as I laid on my bed facing the wall and covering my face with the blanket.
"Alright sleep well Lana...Goodnight."
"mhmm.." I mumbled as my mom turned the lights off and closed my door.

I sat ip in the dark and started crying I knew I had to explain myself to Marina. The call ringed her phone but she never answered and it just took me to voicemail. I must be bothering her which I don't want to.

As I locked my phone all I saw in my mind were stolen images of everything we had done. I know its only been four months but the love I felt for Marina was barely being expressed. After all these year I knew what I felt towards her was only the beginning.

I laid on my bed.

And I cried myself to sleep.