Learning To Fall

fourteen

Thanksgiving. A time when you're supposed to be thankful for the things you're given. A time for families to be together. So, as usual, Lillian shipped us off to grandma's. One thing I was thankful for. Elliot, not so much.

"I can't believe she shipped us off again," He gripes from the other couch. We were sitting in the living room, a couple days until Thanksgiving.

"Does it really surprise you?" I question, leaning back on the couch I was currently on. I was engrossed in The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett, trying to distract myself from the chaos that was my life.

"No. But, seriously? I think it's time we meet our step cousins." Elliot continues, and I look over at him.

"If they're anything like Lillian, I don't want to." I conclude, he nods in thought.

"Maybe they're not total spawns of satan." He says, and I shrug. Eli laughs in reply.

"Doubtful. They're filthy rich, and by the looks of all of their family photos, they're spoiled." I debate, he nods once again. "Plus, I think we have enough cousins. This is only mom's side, and we have Hailey, Jax, the twins, and Kora. On dad's side, which is two days from now, we have Georgie, Grace, and JJ."

"Don't remind me. I swear, JJ made the phrase 'you got games on your phone?' famous," Elliot laughs, and I join in. It was true. Every time JJ saw Elliot, he'd cling to his side and pester him until Eli let him watch cartoons on Netflix.

"Well, you have a week to prep." Is all I say before going back to the paragraph I was reading. I was hoping Elliot didn't notice, but sometimes the only reason I read is to escape reality. I didn't want to face what Calum told me on Sunday. It was bad enough that I was dodging both his and Michael's messages. Was Calum telling the truth, or was it just drunken banter?

"Is everything okay? Calum just texted me to ask you if you're okay." Elliot informs me. That little traitor.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" I ask, a little too defensively.

"Andy, you're my sister. I know when something's wrong." Thank God he didn't play the twin card. "Plus we're twins, so," And there it is.

"Elliot, I'm really fine." I lie.

"Liar," He sings, causing me to roll my eyes. I hated when he saw through me. So, instead of shutting him out, I tell him everything. He listens through the whole story, and nods at certain parts. Finally, when I'm done, it takes him a while to respond.

"Well, what do you believe?" Is his response, which only makes me think more. The truth was, I didn't know. Calum was my best friend, why would he lie to me? And I had only known Michael for three months. But why would Michael talk to Luke, especially after I told him how Luke used me? It was one big mess entirely.

"I don't know." I finally sigh. I wanted to believe that Michael was innocent. But at the same time I knew Calum wouldn't lie to me, especially about Michael.

"What I do know is that ignoring both of them isn't going to solve anything. So, text Calum and tell him you're still breathing and you're okay before I drive a whole four hours down there to kick his ass," Eli jokes before laughing. "Seriously, the boy's threatening to drive up here."

"Oh my god, Cal." I laugh as I open my messages, sending Calum a hey, I'm fine before going back to my book. Maybe this break away from both of them is what I need.

>>

"So, how's school going Andy?" My grandmother asks after passing me the stuffing. I shrug in reply before answering.

"It's going pretty well, I have A's and B's in my classes."

"Any boys?" Hailey, my ten year old cousin asks. I almost choke on my stuffing.

"Now, Hailey," My grandmother starts, but I shake my head. It was a common question. Kora, Hailey's older sister, met her fiancé during senior year.

"S'okay, Gram. No Hails, I don't need a man in my life." I joke, and she breaks into a wide grin.

"When is Luke coming back?" Five year old Harry asks, and his twin brother Henry urges me on. Last Thanksgiving, I brought Luke and everyone loved him. After what happened, my dad called Gram and explained what happened. She said a few choice words, and invited me to stay up here through winter break which I'd gladly accepted. Unlike her daughter, she was actually there for my first heartbreak. My grandmother and I exchange eye contact before I clear my throat and answer.

"Luke won't be coming back, guys. I don't talk to him anymore."

"Is he a bad guy now?" Henry asks innocently.

"Yeah, he's a bad guy," Elliot finishes for me. I could always count on him. Kora nods in agreement from down the table, and that's the end of our Luke conversation.

After dinner, my grandma pulls me aside.

"Are you sure you're okay? I saw how your expression changed when the boys mentioned Luke. Did something else happen?" She questions. I shake my head.

"I just have a lot on my plate right now Gram," I confide. She puts a hand on my shoulder.

"You know, you remind me of Grace when she was your age. Strong willed, independent, smart. And you know what she did when she first got her heart broken?"

"What?" I urge, hoping for a pick me up.

"She cried for months afterwards." Oh. "But, did she let that stop her? No. She met your dad, and the two instantly clicked. Do you see what I'm saying?" I did see what she was saying. Maybe it was time to stop not trusting guys because of what Luke did. Maybe it was time to let go of the past.

>>

"You mean you actually don't care? You, of all people?" Rachel laughs from her line of the phone. I roll my eyes and lay back on the guest bed.

"I mean, think about it. It's not my problem if Michael talks to Luke. They're both Austrailian, both kinda punk. It'd make sense for them to know each other."

"Why would Michael talk to Luke now, of all times? And don't tell me it's for school." Rachel says, and I sigh.

"I'm trying not to hold grudges." I admit, and I can basically see her tilted head and crossed arms. "I mean it, Rae."

"And I tried not to give Riley a black eye, and we all saw how that worked out. What happens when you see Cecily?" Damn. I was hoping she would avoid that name.

"I ignore her, easy." I lie. Rachel scoffs.

"Go to bed. You'll come to your senses tomorrow. Call me when my Andy comes back." She says, and with that she hangs up. Thanks Rachel.

I lay down on the bed, thinking about what I really think about this situation.