night - joshler

and we will try again

tyler lays down on his back, looking up from josh's comfortable bed.
"hey red, do you love me?"
josh stops doodling and sets his pen down, smiling to himself.
"of course i do tyler. you're my best friend."

tyler slightly smiled at that, yet he wanted a different response.

"you're mine too."

and josh watches tyler, watches as his tongue is in between his teeth, and returns his gaze to the ceiling. and josh wonders what he's thinking.

"wanna know something i've always wanted to do, but i've never had the guts to do?"

josh shrugs, "what?"

"i want to get a tattoo."

josh looks up at tyler wide eyed. he chuckles slowly, his eyes crinkling. as if he's laughing at an impractical joke.

"i'm serious. i know someone who will do it for me. come on, let's go."

-

josh glances nervously at the shorter boy. tyler being oblivious to the fact that josh was terrified. so tyler proceeds, knocking on the freshly painted oak door. they hear some shuffling and laughter, and footsteps.
"is that tyler joseph or are my eyes playing tricks on me?" the tall man laughs.
"nice to see you too, brendon. is dallon working tonight?"
a smirk appears on the other mans face, and joshes grip on tyler's hand loosens.
"so you've finally taken up the idea of getting a tattoo."
the smaller boy nods, smiling. and grabs joshes hand and leads him inside.

it's a clean house, and brendon leads the two boys to wherever dallon is, they see a man sitting in a black recliner seat, he's heavily tattooed and seems to be adding another.

dallon looks up quickly and smiles, "hey there ty. ill be done in just a couple minutes. you can go sit down for a couple
minutes, and i'll bring you in when i finish." he says with a warm smile. josh grins back, and all of a sudden, tyler doesn't.

-

"are you sure about this?" josh asks. tyler nods, not allowing himself to back out of it. he thinks about all of the jagged lines and cigarette burns that mark tyler's arms up and down, and he begins to worry. he can't back out of it, or josh will know that somethings wrong. so tyler prays on the slight chance that he won't notice.
tyler's knocked out of his thoughts when josh stepped on his toe.

"i drew out what i wanted at joshes, he was sleeping," tyler giggles, and josh swears it's one of the loveliest sounds.

-

tyler grips josh's hand so hard it could turn blue. he closes his eyes and tries to focus on anything, specifically brendon, who is severely wasted, talking about how he met some of his friends. brendon was being extremely over dramatic, and it was hilarious. it kept his mind off of it.

tyler groans and grasps the table when dallon gets to his wrist, "it's almost done." josh whispers in his ear, heart aching due to seeing the small boy in pain.

"what the fuck is going on?" brendon laughs, sitting on the very edge of his seat. he then proceeds to dump his beer all over himself.

-

"it's done tyler, you can open your eyes." tyler slowly opens them, a dull ache in his arms. he smiles at the red and irritated tattoos. he looks up at josh, who is studying his arm closely. and josh has a pain in his heart. the boy josh is growing to love is one of the most mistreated people, he assumed this, but having every thought confirmed was devastating.
tyler can feel joshs eyes on him. he leans his head back to where it's touching his chest, and josh placed his hand on tyler's fluffy hair.

josh swears he hears tyler apologize. he takes his hand, walks out of the house after thanking dallon, and buckles tyler into his seat in his car.

-
"i really do have to head home."
josh nods and hugs tyler tightly.
"come over tomorrow, we could go somewhere and we could talk and everything will be okay."
tyler smiles small, "id love that. i love you." he whispers, pressing his forehead to josh's.

tyler looks back at josh for a mere second before disappearing inside the house, and josh sighs. his breath feels caught in his throat, and it makes him sick. he knew what was going on, and it really didn't make sense. tylers adoptive dad being the disgusting person he is, and why he is that way. tyler isn't safe in that household and this, josh knows.  and that's when josh decides to run up to the house, he opens the door quietly and sees tyler in the kitchen. tyler jumps at the figure, but relaxes as to seeing it was simply just josh.

"hey red," he smiles.

he grabs tyler's hand and takes him to his car and he drives him home. to his home. tyler asks no questions and says no words the whole ride.

"can i see your arm?" josh says with one hand on the steering wheel.
tyler shakes his head, his eyes jumping around the car, avoiding josh.
"tyler, baby, please. i already know, i want to help you. let me help you."

he hesitantly brings his arm out, looking away. the newly added tattoos are still puffy and red against his pale and scarred complexion.
josh pulls the car over, and pulls tyler's sleeve up. and his eyes widen as he sees a large number of circular and straight scars. and a bruise around his wrist.

"i'll kill him, tyler." josh says. there's fire running though his veins and he has never felt so angry about anything in his entire life. josh is fuming and seeing this small, gentle boys arm is what makes him lose his faith in the world.

tyler sighs, his eyes becoming glassy.

"it's okay. i'm out soon, ill live with you. it's the systems fault. they placed me with him and ignored me every check up.  i'm starting to come to terms with the fact that maybe not everything it fault."

josh places his forehead against tyler's.

"this isn't your fault."