Hold on JackABoy

Chapter 20- The Wooden Box

Jacks Pov

"Sean you're 16. Don't you think it's time you found a job?! I mean seriously, you just sit here all day moping around." My mother slurred, she wasn't fully drunk yet but enough to where she couldn't talk right. It had been about a year since 'I' got Henry arrested. My mum doesn't blame me but I do. Shes been so sad lately. She still speaks about suicide growing in my youth's population so I don't see her as much but when she's home she's either crying, drunk, or asleep.
"No mum I don't think I'm ready.." I groaned.  I wish I could be a better son. The son she wanted and deserves. I wish I never called the cops, I should of let Henry carry on like he always does.
" alright I guess. Good night baby." She said sloppily planting a kiss on my forehead and walking downstairs. I wiped off her spit and sighed.
I was about a week clean, which was really good for me. Usually I could only make a day or two... maybe three at my best. I rolled back in my computer chair while turning to face my bed room drawer. I opened it and felt under my cloths and grabbed out a wooden box I had made in wood shop 2 years ago. I made sure it could be locked so no one found what was in it. I rolled back to my computer at my desk and pushed my keyboard putting the box in its place. I pulled up my key chain and unlocked the box. When I opened it I was greeted by
a lighter, a bowl, a nug of purple kush, my grinder, a few blades, an altoids tin, a box of fags, [cigarettes] and a heavy duty pack of sleeping pills. I picked, walked to my window with the box and opened it. I sat on my window sill starting to grind. Once I packed my bowl I grabbed my lighter and clicked it a few times making sure there was enough lighter fluid in there. I put the bowl between my parted lips and bright the flame toward it watching the green turn from red to black as I lifted my thumb and inhaled. I stuck my head out the window and exhaled watching the cloud of smoke depart from my body. I repeated this again but taking a much bigger hit resulting in me coughing but it was good. I took the butt of my lighter and pushed it into the ash moving it. Once I noticed it was pretty much ash I dumped it out my window and packed my bowl 1 more time. I took 2 more big hits and put it back. I kept my gaze out the window as I felt my body start to feel tingly as if time was moving a little slower than usual. I don't smoke much because if I smoke to much I freak out. But it was just enough to be nice. I almost didn't want to continue. I looked down into the box. I grabbed a fag and lit. They say if you smoke a fag after getting high it makes the high last longer. I'm not sure how true that is but I like the idea of it.  Once I took a few drags I accidentally dropped it out the window. It had taken me a couple of seconds to realize what had just happened.
"Fuck.." I say. Looking down I go to grab another but realize that was my last one.
"But I had a full box?" I almost yelled.
I decided to just move along. I drank some of my orange flavored water and began.  I grabbed one of the razors and slit both my wrists, pretty deep. I laughed at the pain. It hurt like a bitch especially since I was high but then I didn't feel it because I was high, and my mind moved on. I then looked over at the sleeping pills and put a couple in my hand. I looked at them probably too long, I threw them into the back of my through and drank down some water. I then took a few more pills and repeated the process. I did this until half the bottle was gone. Then my stomach started cramping up. At first it scared me but then again I was high so my mind moved on. Every few seconds my stomach would hurt so bad it would pull me back to reality and then my high would pull me back again. Until I fell and then I was asleep.
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I woke up to the alarm. I went to roll over to see what time it was and something stopped me. A heavy weight on my body. It was Mark. I looked down and smiled. He was still asleep.  I turned my head. "4:34am ughhhhh" I whispered. I leaned over and kissed Mark's head which awoke him immediately.
He looked scared at first, then he realized and gave me one of the sweetest warmest smiles. Then I watched his face go from confusion to concern.
"Jack you were crying what's wrong?" He pushed himself up to look at me. I hadn't noticed I had been crying. I wiped my cheek to feel that it was soaking wet. "I think I had a flashback... I must've forgotten to take my medication yesterday." I confessed not sad nor shameful.
"I'm sorry," he said "Are you ok?" He asked.
I nodded.
"Ok well I'm going to remind you to take it before we leave, but right now we have to go meet Bob and Wade at the airport so get dressed, grab your bag and meet me in the living room in like 5 mins ok babe?" He asked as he kissed my face and jumped off my bed and ran out.
"Ok" I yelled after and laughed. It was a genuine laugh too. All I could do was smile at that big doof.