Hold on JackABoy

Chapter 36- The Walk

Jack's POV

I looked down at my hands.
"How could I do this?"  I cringed. I was floating in a black abyss, curled up in a ball. I kept trying to curl up tighter and tighter, trying so desperately to disappear.
"I'm in a coma because of you,"  I heard someone say.  "What no.. it can't be." I moved my gaze up. I looked up to see Mark, his stature towering over me. His eyes were black and he was crying blood as red as his hair. He slowly stuck out his arm and pointed at me. "You," He said. "You did this to me."
I looked up in fright, feeling the guilt wash over me.
"I-I didn't mean too. I was the only one meant to get hur-" he cut me off. "SILENCE!" he yelled, which rung through my ears. "You killed me."
"No." I held my head in my hands.
"YOU killed me."
"No," I whispered.
"You did," He said one last time.
"NO!" I screamed, banging my hands against my head.

"JACK JACK HEY YOU'RE OK!!! JACK!" I woke up to see Jade straddling me, with both her hands on my shoulders shaking me. Once I realized I was up, I started to bawl my eyes out and she immediately pulled me into a hug.
"It's ok Jack...It's ok," She cooed.
"No its not." My broken sobs barely ran through her shoulder.
"Shhhh." she rubbed my back. I was finally able to regain my breathing and she moved off me and sat back sighing in relief. "Never have I been so embarrassed," I said, looking straight ahead at the dresser. "Its ok Jack," She said. 
"Do you wanna talk about it?" She asked. I nodded back and fourth while still looking at the dresser.
"Ok I understand but if you ever want to..." She finished that sentence by making a peace sign. I giggled at her actions. She got off my bed and extended her hand. "Lets go eat some food." I grabbed her hand and she pulled with great force. Damn she was fast. I made it to the kitchen in one piece, looking over at the breakfast already made.
"French toast," I whispered. "Bitch." I laughed out in a high tone. "Don't show me up!" I said flailing my arms up into the sky. She laughed and took a bite of the toast and walked over to me with her fork. There was a piece of french toast on it. While her mouth was still full of toast she shoved it around my face.
"Ohh commoonnn home slice you know you want some tasty, delicious, savory, golden brow-"
"Alright alright." I laughed grabbing her plate and fork while she got another dish. I shoved a piece in my mouth. "Shit this is really good," I said graciously, taking like 17 more bites. She sits at the end of the table and I join her by sitting opposite of that. I began thinking of the day I met her.
"Hey Jade?" My voice sounded serious.
"Do you.. do you mind if i ask you a question that might be ignorant and offensive?" She nods shoving more toast in her mouth.
"The day we met you said you were transgender. Like I know what that is but at the same time I wouldn't have a clue... So I wondering if you could educate me?.. Sorry if that's rude I mean you do-" she swallowed harshly to cut me off.
"Hey its cool dude I'm kinda glad you asked!" She took a breathe. "Ok so.. I was born into the world as Riley Parker Jones. My whole entire life, yes even when I was younger, I just felt wrong and different."
She paused to think. "When I was about 8 or 9 I remember my dad caught me in one of my friends dress. I had just wanted to try it onto see what it was like. I was totally in love. Once I was old enough I got a job and would secretly buy dresses and nail polish.
That was around age 15? Yeah.... well one day I came home and my brother who was 17 had found all of the dresses when he was looking for the spare car keys. I vividly remember him taking me by the shirt and pushing me against the wall. And saying things like 'no brother of mine will be a tr*nny' and calling me a 'royal f*ggot sibling'. I pleaded with him as he carried out all my dresses outside and threw them in the fire pit. He poured gasoline on them and kicked me to the side, lighting them up. After he knew, beating me became a constant variable in our relationship. I remember one day him and his college friends held me down as he cut my hair off." I was looking at her in horror. This is awful.
"Once I was 16, I became the first transperson of colour to join an all-girls school. Bullying became a high because the hormones, or HRT, had just begun working. I developed very small breasts and I still had my male parts, which I was utterly disgusted with. When it was time for me to graduate I was totally looking like the women I wanted to be." 
"I stopped identifying as Riley and started as Jade Elizabeth Marie. I changed my name and license over. By the time I was 22, I was able to get gender reassignment surgery and I've never been happier!" She said and her eyes beamed. "I'm glad that story had a happy ending though." I said smiling.
"But why would you change your name. Riley is unisex, isn't it?" I questioned.
"I don't know. I think maybe it's because I associated that name with so many bad things and it just makes me feel masculine as possible you know?" I nodded, kinda understanding what she was talking about.
I looked at the clock and almost choked. 3:48 pm
(Don't know if I made an announcement but I changed most the clocks to 12 hour time since he is in America now)
"3:48? How long were we talking? How long was I asleep??" I was dumbfounded at how late it was.
"Yeah you slept a while but I wanted you to get rest," She said finishing her french toast.
"D-did you wanna do something today?" I asked tapping my fingers.  She pondered the question while humming and tapping her chin as a joke.
"Uhhhh did you want to go for a walk?" She asked. I nodded and excused myself to go get ready.
About 15 minutes later I walked out in a T-shirt and jeans. I was trying to be confident even though my arms were bandaged. She gave me a reassuring smile and we walked out into hallway, down the hallway and out the door. We walked around for a bit and ran into different shops.
"New England Shoppe," I read out in a funny British accent. We walked in while giggling. I was looking around when all of a sudden I couldn't find Jade.
"Jade? J-jade?" I said looking around.
"Pssstt," I heard and turned to see a lobster being shoved in my face. "There is no Jade just me, Larry the Lobster," she said in a low voice, shaking the crab. I laughed and pushed it out of my face. I looked around and grabbed a lobster hat.
"Oh yeah!" I put it on my head and did a superhero pose. "Then prepare for LARRY ZE LOBSTER!!" I said and she broke out into laughter. 

After a few hours we headed back so we could watch our movie. Once we got back in the house we got in our pajamas and turned off most the lights. I picked Hocus Pocus  and we sat Indian style on the couch. The commercials  began.
"Oh! Be right back!" She said lunging to her room.
She came back out with a bowl and a lighter with a little grinder. She sat down and looked at me.
"Do you mind?" She asked. I nodded and watched as she started to pack a bowl. Its been so long since I've been high...but it made my PTSD go crazy sometimes. I watched her blow out her hit, and she coughed, hitting her chest. "Want one?" She said extending her her arm out to hand me the bowl.
"Uhh.." I just looked at it.
"You don't have to, no worries." She smiled and started to take it back, but I grabbed it and her hand.
She looked at me and we locked eyes. She handed me the bowl and I put my hand out for the lighter.
I put the bowl between my lip and lit the green. I took the hit graciously but because it had been a while, I took too big of a hit. I started coughing immensely. "Woah easy there tiger." She chuckled. She extended her hand and I went "uh uhuhh puff PUFF pass my lady." I smirked as she pouted. I took another hit and passed the bowl to her. The movie had finally started and I was getting high. I exhaled the smoke and leaned back, ready for what would come next.

The next thing I knew, I was heading to bed and I had eaten 2 whole bags of Doritos. I knew I used to love doing this. "Especially this time," I said, getting into bed and falling asleep ASAP.

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