Break Me-A Harry Styles Fanfiction

Chapter 26-Exposed

My erratic heart beat throbs insistently, echoing in my ears. It pounds heavily against my chest, so demandingly that I fear it may burst within its confinements.

  What the hell am I doing?

  I had allowed my anger and independence to get the best of me, and ignored Harry's commands of refusing Austin's not so tempting offer. Not that Harry was correct in his controlling tone, but he was right to try and get me to avoid accompanying a stranger on his motorcycle. However, I had stupidly stood my ground, my stubborn nature preventing me from thinking logically. Apparently Harry is quite stubborn himself, for his pleads of my declination have ceased.
  I swing my leg awkwardly around the bike, stumbling slightly, the shot of whiskey still pumping throughout my veins in no way aiding to my coordination.
  "Hold onto me." Austin instructs from his seated position on the motorcycle, and I do as told, reaching my arms out in front of me, and attaching myself to him. His body is hard and unwelcoming, providing me with little comfort. In no way is it similar to Harry's, Harry's is toned, yet gentle, warm and comforting; a safe haven to me.
  The rev of the engine produces a swarm of new anxieties to erupt within my stomach, swirling relentlessly in my twisted gut.
  "Um, is it safe to be driving in the snow?" I offer a weak excuse, silently praying that the weather conditions prevent us from making our descent. My pleads are apparently humorous, evoking a chuckle from Austin, as his grip on the handlebars tighten.
  "It's fine." He claims, but I remain unconvinced.
  I turn back to face Harry who seems much further than he actually is, his cold demeanor in no way aiding to my worried state. He stands across the parking lot, arms folded at his chest, lips pulled into a straight line, eyes narrowed, anger radiating off of him in engulfing waves. I gulp, taking a deep breath, and shutting my eyes in an attempt to calm myself, but am unsuccessful.
Without warning, Austin zooms across the concrete, the sudden movement causing me to cling helplessly to him, my eyes widening drastically at our newfound speed. He quickly pulls out of the parking lot, and down the road, Harry's silhouette becoming increasingly smaller.
  My hair whips out behind me, blowing freely in the wind. The motorcycle rides in a perfectly straight line, as we continue to speed down the outstretched road. The previous anxieties I'd felt dissolve, disintegrating with each turn of the wheels, and become replaced by an extreme carelessness. My whole body aches with happiness, bursting with joy and rejuvenation.
  Free, liberated, alive. These emotions consume me, and as a huge grin emerges onto my face, I dangle my head back behind me to get a clear view of the stars. Snow relentlessly falls from the frosted clouds above, but the light of the stars still shine from behind them, brightness seeping through, slightly illuminating the black sky.
  "Woohooo!" I hear myself scream into the night sky, an untroubled contentment combusts beneath the surface of my skin, diving into my pounding heart, and shimmying through my flowing veins.
  Austin chuckles at my sudden outburst, but I barely notice. I hug his body tightly, beaming with excitement, and independence, as the thrill of the experience electrocutes my nerves.
  He navigates the bike down a winding road, the vehicle speedily and noisily zipping past the rows of trees beside the concrete, each object of nature blending together to form a splurged configuration of patterned greens, and browns. All too quickly, Austin maneuvers the bike in a different direction, and sends us heading back in the direction of the parking lot, disappointment creeping it's way into my calm, and serene mind.
  I want nothing more than to stay on the back of this motorcycle for all of eternity, to hold on for dear life, and just drive. To escape reality, escape flashbacks and nightmares, escape from myself. The bitter wind attacks my face, dripping into my pours, and riddling its way down into my bones, evoking a full body shiver, but I don't mind. The freedom, and exhilarating fear that accompanies this vehicle is almost addictive, and I want more than anything to ride into the blackness of the night, and disappear without a trace, to be gone with nothing but a whisper.
  Reality is that of a slap in the face as we near the parking lot, a stone faced Harry idles in the same position as before. The bike slows to a halt, and Austin kills the vehicle as he removes the key, the engine fading away. I sling my leg around the motorcycle, careful not to fall, or expose myself in my tiny scrap of clothing, and stumble off of the bike. Harry stomps over to us, and though his sour mood is almost tangible, I refuse to allow him to rid me of my high, which still surges throughout my entirety.
  "That was amazing!" I cry, flinging my arms around Harry's neck, and burrowing my face into his warmth. I plant multiple kisses onto his skin in an attempt to lighten his mood, his body heat radiating off of him. A deep chuckle rumbles through his chest, vibrating from beneath his jacket. The familiar noise heats my shivering body, warmth resonating down to my toes.
  "I'm glad you had fun." Harry smiles sincerely, as I lift my head from it's resting position.
  "I did." I beam, and Harry leans in to me, pressing our foreheads together in an intimate and loving gesture.
  As well as Harry's bad mood, our surroundings fade away into nothingness as I stare into the infinite depths of Harry's eyes. Emerald meeting ocean blue in an gaze so powerful, and so endearing that it almost brings me to my knees.
  "Um," Austin clears his throat, snapping both Harry and me back to reality. "I should go. Nice to see you again, Styles, and nice to meet you, Bella." He awkwardly stumbles away as Harry and I call out our goodbyes to him. Harry places a soft kiss to my lips before asking,
  "Ready to go?"

  As Harry's car drives down the darkened path, the ventilating heat blasts, instantly warming my shivering frame. I can't help but watch Harry as he controls the vehicle, drinking in his perfect complexion; plump pink lips, long slender nose, delicately chiseled jawline, and of course, his expressive and intense forest green eyes.
  Harry shoots me a crooked smile as a result of my distractive staring.
  "What?" He asks.
  "Nothing." I look away, and we sit in moments of silence, the only sound heard is that of the blasting air flowing from the air ducts.
  "I'll miss you next week." He admits randomly, penetrating the quiet with his heart-swelling confession. I turn my head back in his direction.
  "What do you mean?"
  "We have a break from school."
  "Oh right," I remember "Thanksgiving." It had slipped my mind that I'd promised my family that I would come home for the four days of Thanksgiving break. Though I feel guilty for thinking this way, I can't help but dread my departure. I know the break will be short, but I'll miss Harry too, and since he doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving, he'll most likely be bored out of his mind, seeing as four days isn't enough time for a trip to England.
  "What will you do when I'm gone?" I ask, hoping he won't be caged inside of his dorm room all weekend.
  "I usually go to Niall's house, his mum makes a huge meal, and all of his relatives come. It's kinda nice, I guess." He explains, and suddenly an idea strikes me. I have no idea if my parents will willingly agree, but it's worth a shot.
  "You should come to my house for Thanksgiving." I timidly propose, unsure of what Harry's initial reaction will be. I am instantly greeted by the prominent dimple concaving Harry's right cheek, filling my body with light.
  "Really?" He asks hopefully "You would want me to go?" I nod enthusiastically, a grin on my face forming to match his own.
  "Of course." I say.
  "Yeah, okay. Sounds good." He responds, his pearly white teeth on full display, glowing in the surrounding dullness of the night.
  The remainder of the car ride is spent in a comfortable silence, both Harry and me smiling to ourselves like idiots. A positively euphoric energy flows between us, as our giddy, and childish excitement builds up inside.
  As we pull onto school grounds, I am relieved to find that no one is around to witness our breaking of the rules, our permanent records would sure to be damaged after an infliction such as leaving school grounds if we were caught. Harry and I walk hand in hand back in the direction of the girls' building, but he makes a sudden turn, taking me by surprise.
  "Harry, my dorm is that way." I tell him, pointing my finger towards the large stone building which shelters over one hundred girls.
  "Stay with me tonight." He says, the emerald in his eyes blazing into mine.
  "What? I can't, I-, what about your room mate?" I stutter, completely taken aback by his unexpected suggestion.
  "My room mate was expelled last week, and why can't you? I stay in your room all of the time." He defends pleadingly, and I know that he's right. I look back and forth between the building and Harry, an internal battle waging in my brain, conflicting and ambushing my sensible thoughts. My brain tells me one thing, but my heart contradicts it, causing me to tighten my grip on Harry's fingers, and allow him to lead me towards his dorm room.

  The wooden door swings open, hinges creaking as we step inside of the tiny room. Articles of Harry's clothes are sprawled around, strewn across the floor, and overflowing from the clothing chest. However, the bed identical to his holds no belongings, indicating, as Harry said, that no one currently occupies it.
  "I have a spare toothbrush that you can use." Harry calls to me, disappearing into the bathroom to retrieve the object. I plop myself onto his bed, from the other room I can hear him rummaging through the drawers in search of the toothbrush. Minutes pass before he emerges, a plastic blue toothbrush is held out to me.
  "Found it," He smiles "Don't worry, it's never been used."

  Harry and I stand side by side, staring not-so-subtly at each other through the mirror, as we scrub our teeth, digging the plastic objects into our mouths to collect plaque particles. As he circulates the brush throughout his mouth, Harry pulls a silly face at me, and a burst of giggles rush up from the back of my throat, almost causing me to choke on the minty toothpaste currently cleansing my teeth. A mischievous smirk occupies Harry's features, eyes dancing playfully as dimples adorn his cheeks.
  Once we've finished, Harry exits the bathroom, allowing me time to remove the makeup drawn onto my face. Mascara runs down my cheeks in thick black streaks, and red lipstick spirals down the drain along with the cold water. I wipe the excess products from under my eyes, and feeling fresh-faced, content, and clean, I exit the bathroom to join Harry.
  I stand before him, towering above him from his seated position on his bed. He looks up at me, and his eyes widen slightly, a small cough awkwardly erupting from the back of his throat. His gaze hungrily rakes down my body, drinking in the shape of my frame in my tight dress.
  "Come 'ere," He instructs, pulling me closer by the waist. Harry tugs me down, and I collapse onto his bed, lying on my back against the plush mattress. His body hovers over mine, and Harry wastes no time in attacking my lips, forcefully crashing his down onto my own. Electricity surges through my body, sparking every one of my senses into a jolting alertness.
  Harry's plump lips move away from my mouth, giving me time to breathe after his ferocious ambush. His mouth finds my neck, sucking gently on the flesh, causing my eyes to flutter closed at the sensation, bursts of pleasure popping beneath the surface of my skin.
  "Open your eyes," Harry breathes, and I do as told. I am met by a lustful, and incredible emerald stare, his eyes emitting an unfathomable intensity that holds my gaze confidently. Raw emotion lies deep within the inner core of his irises, and it is this moment that I realize what I want. I want Harry, all of him. I want to be connected in every way possible, to get our bodies as close as they can be. Never in my life have I felt such deep feelings for another, and I am ready to give up every and anything for him, even my innocence.
  "Harry," My voice sounds breathy, shaky. "I'm ready to...you know." A feverish blush creeps onto my cheeks, eyes darting down to avert from Harry's stare. Even in such a serendipitous state, I still find myself embarrassed to completely admit my confession, a smidgen of shame resting in the fact that I have never slept with anyone. Gleaming with desire, Harry's darkened eyes burn into my skin, dimples becoming prominent as a smirk plays on his full lips.
  "You're ready to fuck me?" He teases confidently, and my cheeks burn with embarrassment. I release a sound somewhat resembling a squeak, and meet his lustful stare.
  "Um, yeah." I laugh awkwardly, rolling my eyes at the amusement that dances within Harry's green irises.
  "You sure?" He asks, a seriousness abruptly overcoming all other humor within him, his eyes boring into mine.
  "Yeah." I say again, I have never been more sure of anything in my life. I have never felt more ready, more invested in such a situation. Unaware of what to do next, I follow my instinct, fingers lifting at the base of Harry's black t-shirt, his tanned skin exposing itself to me. Realizing my intentions, Harry aids in my removing of his clothing, lifting the shirt over his head, and revealing his toned and muscular chest, numerous ink splatters swirling atop the flesh. My heart pounds against my ribcage, hammering inside of my body like the wings of a hummingbird flapping within the confinements of a trap.
  Mouths meeting once more, Harry's tongue glides between my parted lips, and he gently lifts me a few inches from the mattress. The minty taste of Harry's lips is absorbed by my body, every pore and every sense is overtaken by his indescribable energy. His nimble fingers skillfully slide my jacket down my arms, discarding it to the hardwood floor. We break apart, Harry leaning in to unzip the minuscule fabric of my dress.
  Suddenly, Harry's actions cease once his eyes become glued to something unknown. His previously rosy cheeks pale, eyes widening slightly, mouth agape. I wonder what could possibly hold his attention at a time like this, and look down to meet his gaze, curious blue eyes peaking down to match that of his emerald ones. Once I see, my heart plummets down to my stomach, my euphoric state washing away like that of the pull of the undertow in the ocean. Harry and I both intently stare at the exposed skin of my arm, perfectly carved red lines create patterns on the surface of the flesh, minor scabbing has formed over the newly opened cuts. I take a deep breath, not daring to allow my eyes to dart up to Harry, and stay completely frozen, wishing to disappear from the situation entirely.
  "Bella," Harry's voice is calm, an underlying panic laced through his words. "what the hell are these?"

  A/N

Hey guys! I know the last chapter hasn't reached the goal, but I feel bad about how long it took to update last time, so here's an early update. :)