SILENT CALLS

Chapter 4

ALLY'S P.O.V

"Ally?" Dad knocked on my door. We were only arrived half an hour ago from the trip.

"Come on in, dad."

"Are you busy?" He sat in my bed.

"Picking up stuff for school." I yawned, seriously tired. "Anything I can help?"

"About the program-"

I sighed - yes I cut his word with a loud sigh. It's different now. He used to be the coolest daddy in town, always took serious matters easily, until I wasn't sure when he started to be stiff like mom. We never had this kind of conversation with as much attention to details before. Sadly now he's turn into one.

"Can you trust me?" I asked.

"What are you implying?"

"I don't know. I'm not sure of anything anymore, dad. You and mom now scare me the most. I almost can't pick up an option for myself because afraid you wouldn't like it."

"I indeed don't like the sound of new program."

"I want to help people. I want to strum my guitar and sing, help them get through heavy problems they're facing right now." I shed some tears. "Do you even want to know what they're dealing with?"

He bowed. I felt bad about it but dad and I needed to talk it through.

"Cancer." I answered myself. "I'm doing good, daddy. If it costs me an hour or two of my schedule, then I prefer it that way."

"But mom wouldn't agree-"

"Then why did she teach me about helping people at the first place, sang me a lullaby about it?"

Suddenly mom burst came into my room and joined us. I became stiff. Dad stretched his neck nervously. I decided to keep stacking books for tomorrow as waited for any reaction.

"We want you to take school seriously." Mom still had her tone deepened.

"Do I look like not doing so?"

She scanned my room. All math formulas to music sheets and schedules were taped on my bedroom wall.

"Ally..."

"Dad, mom, I get it. But let me do it my way."

They saw me crying. I couldn't hold it. It wasn't just about today at grandma's home. They've seen so much damage that bad environment did to their friends' children, that they're scared it'd happen to me.

Dad came and gave the most comforting hug.

"Been a while." I cried inside his arms.

"I'm so sorry darling."

Mom hugged us both. "You're the only one. We don't want you to turn differently."

"Unless it's for a good cause, I won't." I smiled to them both.

"Okay then, take some rest." Dad closed my door slowly.

"Don't spend too much time on phone." Mom giggled.

She giggled. And I smiled back. Yes, she giggled about that as if it's funny. Little did she know I was dying to open a bunch of Connor's texts that I didn't get to read throughout the day. I've let myself away from phone.

But wasn't midnight our dating o'clock?

"You sound tired." His voice softly filled the room.

"I miss you so much." I started to cry.

"Whoa... Babe what happened?"

"You're right. I'm just tired."

"You don't cry when you're just tired." He cleared his throat. "I'm ears."

"I, uh, probably just had the toughest talk with mom and dad."

"What is it about? Do they find out about us?"

"Oh jeez, gladly not yet. It's about the program I told you last week."

"Let me guess. They don't take it easily?"

"So not easily." I let out a deep breath. "I managed to talk to them through it, of what I want to do for the time being. I assume dad can take it."

"But mom doesn't?"

"I can't tell for sure. She still asks me to stay away from phone the best I can."

"Hun, you just got the highest score on your last quiz. You have the highest GPA. I can't be prouder-"

"Connor, don't give up on me, okay?"

"Never, sweetpie."

I smiled, but bitterly. He held his breath the second I asked the question. Afraid he answered it with doubt. But shouldn't I live with possibilities, no matter good or bad they are?

"I love you, Ally."

"I love you more." I sniffed. "Hey, have packed your bags? I heard somebody's going home tonight."

"Not yet. Comfy couch holds me down."

"Not again. Not like the last time in Manila again." I rolled my eyes. "Get on your feet and stack those jackets in, hun."

"Well, last time in Manila you helped me folding clothes."

"Yet still almost couldn't catch the plane."

"Hahaha. Some lesson to learn. But nah, that's for later thing."

"Con..."

"Al..."

"Jesus." I sighed.

"But love, I'm Connor, not Jesus."

He laughed loud. We enjoyed tonight's each other presence. It didn't matter if I had to talk whispery all the time or had to hide my laughter under the pillow, - as long as his heavy raspy voice still echoed in my ears, I'd be fine.

I didn't get it but I fell asleep at four or something. Have tried to drink so much coffee to stay afloat throughout the night - but plan was a plan. I left Connor talking to himself like a lullaby. I woke this morning to a bunch of virtual kisses. He managed to leave me enough notice before hopping on the plane. Connor, his brothers, and the crew were now thousands of feet up on the sky, reaching home.

But home wasn't home where I was at; his home to me was still far unreached. And after two months, I didn't know if we could hang onto this thin hope forever.