LIMERENCE. / KTH

thirteenth thought

i wait for you,

as you're tossing clothes out of your

dirty closet.

you sniff some items once,

make a disgusted face,

and toss it in a pile.

standing close to you makes me anxious,

and i have to hold my hands

to keep it from trembling.

you give me a gray, oversized shirt,

and a white hoodie.

both of the clothes are much bigger than my size,

but i wear them anyways.

i decided to wear my old, black leggings.

the clothes smell freshly of your cologne,

and the size and the familiar scent

comforts me.

when i am finished changing,

you take one look at me and smile.

"what?" i ask you.

"nothing," you reply, but you continue smiling.

you head off to the bathroom,

with your new clothes in hand.

"where is your brother?" i ask,

after get out of the bathroom.

"he's on some school field trip.

my uncle's picking him up tomorrow

so he can hang out with him and my uncle's family.

i have the house to myself with my mom until then."

we stand uncomfortably,

and you point at your bed.

"all yours," you say,

and i shake my head.

"it's your bed.

i'll sleep on the sofa for today," i argue.

"nah, it's fine. my bed's pretty comfy,"

you say back,

and that settles everything.

it feels weird being

in your house again.

i figured you moved back,

when you found your mom

and returned to seoul.

whenever you talk to me,

i feel butterflies in my stomach

swarming around again.

i want to forget about you,

but i always wander off to you again.

you walk past by me,

heading off to the living room.

my thoughts stop.

i smile quietly to myself because

your shampoo smells of coconut.