It's Always Been You

Chapter Twenty Three; Let Me In

"Are you ready to go, Katniss?" Peeta asks, peering through our bedroom door.

"Mhm." I say, picking my suitcase up off of the ground. This week, President Snow is throwing another party in his mansion. He threw one when Peeta and I first engaged, and my best guess is that he's throwing this one, because Peeta and I must announce the pregnancy to the world in our next interview.

Peeta and I are also having our first check up on the baby. I'm five months pregnant, and I'm growing more rapidly every day. Though all of district 12 knows of my pregnancy, I still haven't announced it to all of panem. However, President Snow and the rest of the Capitol know.

"You look stunning." Peeta says, placing his hand on my giant abdomen. I give him a warm smile.

"Thank you." I say. He nods, grabbing me and pulling me close. He pecks my lips, running his hand through my loose curls.

"I love you, always, Katniss Mellark."

"I love you. Always." I whisper, closing my eyes and feeling his lips brush against the tender skin of my neck. It feels so good to say that.

+++

The beds in the Capitol are always the comfiest. The showers are always the warmest. And the sex with Peeta is always the greatest. I topple over him, laughing to myself. How is it that Peeta has made my least favorite place one of my favorites? How is it that Peeta makes me happy, even when I don't want to be. I know that in just a few minutes, I'll have to snap back into reality. I'll have to walk across the stage and meet Caesar, and make him think I have the best life. However, when it's just Peeta and I, I truly do think that I have the best life... at least until this baby is born and there is an undeniable risk of him or her being whisked off to compete in the hunger games when he or she turns 12.

I stand up, wrapping a robe around me. It barely covers my protruding belly. I chuckle softly as the baby kicks, and I look back at Peeta. "I'll see you out there." I murmur. He nods, pulling his boxers on.

"I can't wait to dance with you all night." Peeta replies. I laugh.

"I'm not sure how long my back will be able to take it." I say, opening the door and staring back at him.

"We'll see." He says with a small smirk. I shake my head, shutting the door behind me. I walk slowly down the hall, meeting Cinna in the prep room.

I open the door slowly, and when I walk in and Cinna sees my bump, his jaw drops. "Katniss! You're so big! You're- you're glowing!"

"Thank you." I say softly. "I really appreciate it."

"Now, are you ready to see your dress?" Cinna asks. I nod. He pulls out a shimmery gold dress that is very loose fitting. I chuckle.

"I guess the tight fitting dresses are done for a while." I say, choking up. I feel tears drop down my face and I start to laugh. "I'm sorry," I say, cracking up. "I have absolutely no control of my emotions, and I'm scared, and-" I say, letting out a short sob as I attempt to catch my breath.

"Katniss, Katniss," Cinna says, engulfing me in a hug. I rest my head on his shoulder, my stomach making the hug quite difficult. I bite my lip.

"How am I going to be a mother?" I ask quietly. "How am I going to raise a baby that could potentially go into the games? This pregnancy... it's changing me. I'm changing, and I'm turning into a person that I hate."

"You're never going to be a person like them."

"What if I already am, Cinna?" I ask. "What if I'm turning into someone I'm not?"

"I think your worries go to show that you're not turning into one of them."

"I'm excited to dance." I blurt out.