The Link 3 - The Huntress

Chapter 34 - Debbie

"You can't keep doing this," Cathy said, looking down at me. The baby in my arms was barely breathing, and I knew his time was short.

"I know," I said, forcibly holding the tears in my eyes. Cathy was my oldest friend and twice the nurse I was. "I can't let him go alone." The tears were fighting hard for release. I wished Cathy would just leave and let me do what I had to do.

"You can't bond with them like this. It will drain you away," Cathy added, softer this time.

"He doesn't have anyone," I said, losing the water battle. I looked down at the pale child in my arms, aeration tube running from his mouth, wired clips on his toes. Born and disposed of in an alley, he survived a cold night in the elements. One month premature and addicted to heroin, he had gone through bouts of shaking and had never opened his eyes. Now his organs were failing. I preferred the shaking to the silent repose.

"I can't stay," Cathy said, wiping her eyes in sympathy with me. "I wish you wouldn't do this. You'll run out of love and learn to hate this place. I've seen it happen."

"Last time," I lied. I already loved the boy. No one should die alone. No one should be without their mother. Cathy turned and left the NICU, walking past the other preemies who had loving parents and others that cared. I leaned back in the chair and began to rock my silent boy as a tear ran down my cheek. He was so weak.

When the door closed behind Cathy, I started to hum a lullaby. I couldn't sing a lick, but it was the vibrations that were important. He had to know that there was someone who knew he lived. I opened the blanket and caressed the dry skin on his arm. Touch was important.

I remembered another child so very long ago. My daughter. There is always something special in the bond between mother and child. In her case, it was pure and thunderous. I smiled at my charge, wondering if he could feel my love as I had felt my baby's. Briefly, as I did every day, I wondered where Esmeralda was and what she was doing. Surrogate or not, a child grows in your belly, and you have no choice but to love them, forever.

I shifted my left arm to stop the sleeping tingles that were beginning. The boy didn't respond at all sending another pang at my heart. To spend your few days on earth in withdrawal and unconscious was awful. Life wasn't fair at all. A roll of the dice and he could have been born to a wealthy family full of love. Instead, life was an alley and short stay in the hospital.

A sharp pain buried itself behind my eyes. The boy jerked, then lay still. I tucked him deeper into my arm and raised the other to rub my eyes. That's all he needed, his tie to humanity waylaid by a migraine. The pain began to fade as I rubbed. I've never had a headache come on so quickly. Usually, they are subtle and grew over time. This one seemed to explode then slowly dissipate. I shook it off and returned my attention to the quiet boy in my arms.

I was halfway through another lullaby when the world shifted. A feeling I hadn't felt in 18 years filled my world. I smiled and looked about for the source and saw only sleeping babies. She was far away, and she found me.

"Help us," Esmeralda thought. My tears changed from sadness to joy. My daughter had found me at my worst and love filled the room. I could feel the soul of the boy in my arms. Unlike his body, it was robust and lovely. Perfect was the only word that matched. I wrapped his soul with mine and led my daughter to him. He would know love, and that was most important of all.

I laughed when I felt him stir and his eyes opened. A gasp, and then labored breathing that was vigorous and purposeful. His dark eyes locked on mine and his unconditional love flooded into me. It was powerful and had no limits.

There was a taint in Esmeralda's link. It was small and struggling, trying to weaken all that she was. I wasn't concerned. My daughter had too much love in her, and now she had mine again. Little John Doe followed me, an unstoppable firehose of emotion, flooding, pushing, and bouncing down the link. Unbounded love that cared little for rules or the desires of darkness.