A Dragonfly's Dream

Chapter XXVIII- I'll find you again

I'll find you again

James had only three months to live. Something was wrong with his heart, and he could not be too excited nor display too much emotion.

It was hard for him to remain calm with me though. With me he just felt so much.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's okay. I just want to spend whatever is left of my time with you."

"Please find me in the next lifetime." I said.

"I will."

................

James stared at the closed door of room 414. Going through that door seemed to bring about momentous changes. The last time he went through it, it had led him to the bravest decision he had ever made in his life and after. He had agreed to trade places with Jim. It was a difficult sacrifice to make. But at the same time it felt good to do the right thing.

Unfortunately, that was not something they could do on their own. They needed Zarael's help. The two of them had gone back up the slope in search for the angel...

Zarael was right where James had left him. The angel's lone figure stood still and quiet against the dark night. There was something in his presence that radiated control. Something in the way he stood made it seem as though he had tamed even the darkness around him. The angel looked up as he saw them approach. "Jim wants you to take his place in this limbo. But are you sure you want to do this?" he asked. Somehow, the angel had known what transpired without them having to tell him all the details.

"I'm ready." James answered. As he said this, he was surprised at how his own voice rang with conviction. For the first time, he was truly standing up for something.

Zarael gave James a searching look, and it seemed as though the angel was scrutinizing his mind, testing his sincerity. James wondered if Zarael had sensed the fear behind his firm declaration. James knew that in doing what was right, he had taken the more difficult road. But he was tired of always taking the easy way out. He had done that before and it only produced tragic results. He was afraid, yes, but he would not back down on this decision.

If ever the angel was impressed by such show of courage, it was not reflected in his demeanor, which remained calm and unperturbed. He turned to Jim. "And you are ready to leave your life behind?"

Jim's voice was a mixture of strength and desperation. His face reflected all his years of waiting and suffering. "I want nothing more than to move on and meet my maker."

The angel looked down and closed his eyes. It seemed as though he was listening to a set of instructions that he alone could hear. Finally, he opened his eyes and addressed them both. "It is done." He said simply.

Jim looked up at the stars and heaved a sigh of relief. He would be able to rest soon. He would finally be able to close his eyes on this plane, and awake to the next. Finally, his long wait was over.

The angel smiled slightly, as he read what was going on in Jim's mind.

Then, he turned to James, and the smile vanished. James had a sinking feeling as the angel looked at him. The angel's face was inscrutable, but there was suddenly an aura of severity about him.

.......

James passed through the wall and entered the room. Jim was already waiting for him beside his unconscious body. Zarael stood beside him.

"I've paid my price." James said.

The angel had asked payment for the way he violated the rules. A deep sense of remorse filled James' being every time he thought of it. He remembered the betrayed look in Lyssa's eyes. She had trusted him. She had given him her heart.

And he broke it to pieces.

Hurting Lyssa was the one thing he never wanted to do. But it was the right thing. If he truly loved her, he needed to set her free so that she could move on with her life.

The angel nodded. "Then it's time for us to go." He offered his hand to Jim.

Jim hesitated and looked back at his body one last time. James saw the happiness in his eyes. Jim was at peace.

A non- verbal communication passed between the two ghosts. In truth, James wanted to tell him so many things. He wanted to tell Jim how bad he felt that things had to be this way. He wanted to tell him how sorry he was. Though he knew it would be futile. Even stupid. Instead, he merely looked at Jim, and hoped he understood. Jim nodded, and it seemed as though he did.

Jim took hold of Zarael's hand.

In the blink of an eye, they were gone.

.........

James was alone in the room. He looked out the window. The sky was a shade of deep purple. The sun would be out soon. The stillness felt like the calm before a long and arduous battle. It was a moment of respite. And one he was thankful for.

He looked at Jim's unconscious body lying on the bed. He slept peacefully. It was connected to him now. It drew life from him. The sunrise would mark the beginning of his new journey. Or his new prison.

At sunrise, he would find himself back at the edge of the slope where he had met Jim. Who knows how long he would stay there.

But in the unlikely event that somehow, he succeeded in waking up, he would forget everything. The veil would wrap around him, and he would forget all that transpired in the spirit realm. He would have a new life as Jim. He would have all of Jim's memories, and his personality. He would forget all about his former life. He would forget all that he was. All of his old memories would recede into nothing just like the fading night. Death was the price of life.

James was well aware of how slim were the chances of that happening. Jim had tried waking up from his coma for years and yet he failed. What were the chances that the result would be any different for him?

He thought of Lyssa and a new surge of determination hurtled forth like a blazing sword cutting through the night.

He thought of all the things he wanted to do for her. There were so many dreams he wanted to fulfill. He wanted to give her the life and the home that she wanted.

He held onto these hopes, because at that moment, they were the only thing that he had.