Forget Me Not

.Two.

I placed my bag on the bed that is apparently mine. It's got while sheets along with a purple comforter, the comforter has Strings of a deep purple thread creating designs through it.This place is so homey, pictures on the wall of unknown scenery, along with abstract paintings. It's nice to be out in the world but I keep going back to the idea that I can't remember some things. To think there are memories that I've lived through and just don't know it. I mean I remember my parents but anything that has happened in the past year or two is fuzzy and I can't even try to remember anything. I don't even know where to start.

I leave the room and walked down the hall to the front room. There were pictures all around, covering the walls and sat upon end tables. They were pictures of younger me, I can remember when each or was taken, so why can't I remember Cody? This sucks. Why is it I can remember memories from so long ago but the most recent ones are lost to me? Poor Cody spent six months in a hospital room by my side and I can't even remember him. He spent days of his life waiting for me to wake up, he spend many words trying to get me to wake up and I can't even pick my brain enough to remember him.

In the front room my mother sat comfortably on the couch"Darling how are you?" my mother asks me once I fully enter the room.

"Good, I guess." I respond hoping I'm convincing enough for her.

She looks at me with sad eyes. "What's wrong darling? I can tell something is bothering you?" Busted.

I let out a frustrated sigh walking over to the couch and slumping beside my mom. "It's just.... I'm so frustrated at this whole situation.This poor Cody guy spent months by me and I can't even remember him. I feel terribly." I could feel my eyes start to get watery and lips start to quiver.

"Oh honey, he understands, you'll get your memory back you will remember him.  It just might take time." She comforts me as she runs my back allowing me the safety she is providing.

I couldn't help but let a few tears escape my eyes before I was a total mess. My vision was blurred by tears, I could taste the salty tears that slid down my cheeks. My mother held me as I cried offering any support and comfort she could. There was a knock on the door and her and I both looked in the direction of the door.

"Oh come in." She yells to the person that knocked so she doesn't have to get up.

"Hey Ms.McKenny, I don't know if..." It was the guy from earlier. I try frantically to wipe my tears away, make myself presentable, probably too late now. I can almost feel how puffy and red my eyes are right now. " What's wrong?" He rounded around the chair I was sitting on and went down to knee level so he could see my face. I didn't want to look him in they eyes, I know if I do I'll cry again.

"I'm so sorry. " I whisper out.

"Sasha please it's alright. I get it. I know this will take time but hey we're already making progress right I mean you're letting me get close to you." He was right I guess, even when I first woke up he had that comforting feeling I liked.

That made me smile a bit.I guess some part of me must remember a little about him or I would hate to have him this close to me. The thought that I can't remember why he brings me this comfort and that only makes my crying begin again.

My mother continues to rub my back "Listen Cody maybe you should just leave her alone for today, let her get settled in here." My mother said to him.

"Right," he said in the most disappointed voice I had ever heard. " I jut brought some of her stuff over." Then he got up and with a shaky voice said" I left it by the door if that's okay." He got up and stated to walk away. "I'm sorry." Was the last thing he said. I close my eyes and hear the door close. I let out a breath, not realizing I was holding it in.

Why was he saying sorry, this was all my fault. His words of apology kept playing in my head. I cried for what felt like forever, I cried until I had no tears left in me. When I finally calmed down it was perfect timing. Another person had come to visit. She entered the room just as I finished cleaning myself up a bit.

"Sasha it's great to see you up and about again." A girl with bleach blond hair said to me giving me a little hug, I kind of remember this women, she's my best friend. I remember doing stupid things with her. I let a smile come to me.

"Carrie?" I also just to be sure. Her face lights up in excitement. I'm right I believe.

"Oh good you remember me!" She squeals and gives me another tight hug. Squeezing the air right out of me.

"It's nice to see you here supporting Sasha, Carrie. Listen you two, I have to go out and get a few things for dinner, and your father has to go into work for a little bit, Carrie would you mind staying with Sasha?" My mother is acting like I'm porcelain or a dog, I might break or I might break something.

"Of corse not, we need to catch up anyways." Carrie responds taking a seat in the couch beside me. We say bye to my mom and with that my mother leaves. "So how has it been being back?"

I take a breath smiling at the end.
"Taking some getting used to."

Carrie nods in understanding and agreement "I can imagine. How has Cody been?"

I don't know how to answer that, Cody is the guy that is supposedly my boyfriend. I don't know if I should tell her. My silence must not be normal, she takes obvious notice.

She looks at me concern filled eyes. "Sasha? Are you alright?"she asks even more concerned then her eyes let on.

"It's just I don't.... remember him, like at all. I mean I remember talking to him and stuff but I don't ever remember us ever dating, I don't even remember ever liking him." You can almost hear the sadness in my voice, even though I said the sentence super fast. " I feel terrible that I can't remember." I finish more audible.

"Oh Sasha, you'll remember after a while, he loves you, he understands. You were in a car accident after all." She says trying to give me assurance.

"I just..." I start,"when I said I didn't remember him his smile just left his face and a part of me just sank." I told her truthfully.

A small smile forms at the corners of her moth. "A part of you remembers, you two are  inseparable. It's like you have been together forever. You two are soul mates, made for each other." She says it so easily, like it's the truest thing in the universe.

"Really?" I say surprised. But also part of me not surprised. It almost feels right, the words she said.

"Oh yeah, I remember when he first asked you out, I was with you when he asked, you blushed the second he asked. And I remember every detail of your first date. You called and gave me a play by play. You were so happy. I believe you two went to a movie, not the most idealistic first date but you enjoyed it." She told me, I was waiting for more but she never gave me anything else. I take a second to think about it.

"I kinda remember that," I start, beginning to remember something like what she's said,"we went and saw some horror movie that I hated, there were way to many jump scares. I had to close my eyes half the time." I finish what I remembered.

"See I told you, part of you just knows." She says smiling and nudging me on the shoulder.