Forget Me Not

.Eight.

"Forever and always" I say remembering the saying vividly. The memory floods to my mind. Cody and me, chocolate covered strawberries, they were our thing just like forever and always.

"What was that?" He asks me confused with a look in his eyes.

"Forever and always." I say a bit louder so I'm easily heard.

"Forever and always." He says a sparkle in his eye. He stares at me with the biggest smile I've ever seen " you remember!" He gets closer to me on the blanket.

"Yeah I do" I whisper. " I love chocolate covered strawberries." I say looking down to my hands on the blanket, trying to drive his attention away from my stupid grin at the fact I'm starting to remember him.

Cody is close enough to me I can feel his breath on my cheek, minty fresh, just like I remember. He turns my head with his hand,l to bring our eyes to meet.

He searches my ace for any red flags I might be putting out, I can tell by the way his eyes are roaming my face. Stoping every round on my lips. "Is this okay?" He asks in the calmest tone, like I'm a deer and if he speaks too loud I'll scamper off.

My heart pounds against my rib cage, now I know why the ribcage is there, it's not just to protect the lungs and heart, it's to make sure in moments like these it doesn't fly away with flatter. "Yeah." I whisper barely audible but I know it was loud enough for him to hear.

He smiles, and leans in close to my ear. "I give you permission to push me away at any moment." He whispers in my ear.

"Okay." I laugh

Cody kisses my jawline from my ear to the corner of my mouth
As his one hand hold him up and the other is rested on my other cheek. I felt the pricking of goosebumps forming on my arms. I got butterflies in my stomach and a race in my chest. Then his lips connect to mine. I remember this feeling. One I loved so dear. The taste of fresh mint from his soft lips. I melt into him. We pull apart. And I can't help but smile and feel my face get warm.

"So?" Cody asks me. I don't know what exact answer he's looking for is. I just stare at him. "Anything?" He continues giving me a nervous smile.

I shake my head and let out a small laugh. "I remember that feeling." I tell him. A smile appears quickly on his face. " It's wonderful." I say and once again kiss him .I can't help feel my heart fly as I kiss him, the ribcage breaching as my heart decides it needs to be free and soar. He pulls away from me. Did I do something wrong. I start to worry.

"Sash as much as I would love to do this all day I don't want to overwhelm you." Gosh he's so considerate. My worry slips away from his words and is replaced with thanks.

I look out to the water, shimmering and slightly moving with the waves."Can we go into the water now?"

"What else is the beach for? Other then making out that is." He winks at me and my heart flutters and my cheeks go red. "Let's get wet." He grabs my hands helping me up off the blanket then dragging me towards the wafer and as we get closer we run into the cold pool of shimming water.

We splash around for a while, it turning into a war like game at times then to a condition of who can slash the best then it repeats. We also share a few more stolen kisses.

"Hey Cody?" I ask once we're out of the water and walking down the beach the warm grainy sand beneath our feet. Our hands intertwined.

"Hum?" He says swinging our hands back and forth.

I look over to him he's facing forward with not a care in the world. "You said I lived with you?"

He looks to me before he answers. "Yeah. You do, did, do?" He says baffled "yeah." He says with a slight laugh.

"Would it be okay if I maybe came over?" I ask quickly afraid of the answers that might follow. What if he thinks it will overwhelm me like before. And rejected it?I just want to remember and honestly I think it would help and I think I'm ready for that step.

"Yeah I would love that." He smiles at me tightening his grip on my hand, holding so tight like if she losses even slightly I'll slip away.

"Okay." I say happy that he accepted my self invite to his , our place.

"When do you want to come over?"

"Will the day after tomorrow  be okay?" I ask thinking tomorrow I'll probably spend the whole day deciding on what to wear.

"It's perfect, gives me time to clean up a bit, make it look the way it did when you left it." He said a small smile at the corner of his lips but not a well adjusted smile.

"The way I left it?" I ask confused

"Well after I found out you were in a coma I kinda got sad, I mean I was jut told that the one o loved most might be gone, or at least for a few days to months. I had lost you, even for a bit, I still lost you. It's been kinda a mess in there for a while. It's been better since you woke up but it ain't perfect yet."

That makes my heart break a little my smile turns down into a line. I've hurt him and I only remember a few things about us. I caused so much and I don't even mean too.I feel terrible and I guess it shows.

"What's wrong?" He asks concerned. Pulling me back slightly since he stoped walking, obviously wanting to get to why I'm upset. I know I can't hide it.

"I'm sorry for hurting you like this." I say tears threatening. I let go of our tight griped hold and sink to the sand covering my eyes. I don't want him to see me cry. I'm an ugly crier, then again is anyone a pretty crier?

"Sash, hey it's okay." He says kneeling slightly and wrapping his arms around me. " It's not your fault baby."

"Yes it is C." I say wiping a few teas away.

"How? Did you purposely get into a crash so you'd be knocked out for a while?" He asked me and I guess I don't, not like it was on my calendar or in my schedule for the day.

"No." I sniffle.

"Then it's not your fault at all. And I don't blame you, nobody does." He assures me.

"Ugh this is so frustrating." I almost scream. Some of my sadness turning to anger.

"I know but baby we'll get through it we always have and always will. It's you and me." He smiles at me trying to reach my happiness and bring it back out.

"You promise?" I ask still unsure, wiping away the last few years that fell.

"Like I've said before I don't care how long it takes. Sash you're the only person I've ever wanted and the only person I want to be with and I will wait as long as it takes to get you back."

I tried to calm myself but the though of how I've put him through so much and continue to do so still, I can't help but cry more, how did I get him. He's perfect. I have to remember more. I know I can. I have to for him. I'm tired of hurting him.

"Now don't cry." He says kissing away each new tear that escapes my eyes. "You make the world sad when your smile fades." That makes my smile return.

I look him right in the eye to send a message, then I kiss him soft and he returns my action.

He pulls away and says one thing. "We just got one step closer." He explains but I don't know what he means and he continues." You called me C, a nickname. You're the only one that's ever called me that." I can't help but give a slight smile a baby step but still a step non the less.

We lay down in the sand. Our feet just where the sea meets land. I can feel the water hitting my toes sending shivers up my body every time the cold water hit me. It's been a perfect day. I can only imagine what my life with Cody was before my accident if it's this good when I only remember pieces of our relationship.

When I arrive back to my parents house I go  to my room tired from the day I had. I'm getting closer to me and I can't help but feel slightly proud, happy and accompanied. I'm nervous about going over to his, our apartment but I also can't wait.

"Forever and always  C. " I whisper to myself before I close my eyes letting my hoes and dreams take me away for the night.