"No."
"That one looks stupid."
"Holy crap that's an ugly top."
"The shoes don't match."
"Are those my shorts!?"
Alyssa's inane pickiness was starting to frustrate me.
"Lyssa," I finally spoke up. "I'm not going anywhere fancy. Just help me find something casual that doesn't look bad on me."
"Fine," She grumbled.
"What put you in a sour mood?" I asked dryly.
She stared at me contemplatively and I knew that look all too well.
"Alyssa, say whatever it is you've been holding back."
"Don't go."
Ok. Well I wasn't expecting that.
"What?"
"I mean it Sasha, tell him you can't go, make up some excuse, blow him off. But don't go."
"I don't understand, this morning you were all 'let him tell you Sasha' and now you don't want me to go anymore?"
Alyssa rarely held her thoughts in and I was unable to gauge why she was doing it this time.
"For fuck's sake stop the censored bullshit, say what you want to say. Make your point already."
My outburst seemed to ignite whatever it was inside her that she had been holding back.
"You're the smartest fucking person I know when it comes to anything academic related, but this situation has turned you into the dumbest person in all of fucking France." Alyssa let out.
"Just out of the tourists or including the whole population?" I threw back sarcastically.
"I'm not joking around, I can't believe you still haven't put it all together!"
"What?" I asked exasperatedly. "What the hell am I missing?"
She let out a deep breath.
"I spoke to "Drew"." she used her fingers to make air quotes when she said his name.
"What?" So it was possible for a jaw to drop open in shock.
"I saw him too," Alyssa told me. "Face to face, I've seen him twice now."
"How," her ambiguity was driving me crazy. "How would you have even recognised him?"
"From the picture you showed me of his chest." She explained heatedly.
I frowned in confusion. "I don't understand? did you see him at the pool or something."
"Sasha, for god's sake think about it!" It seemed like she was five seconds away from gripping my shoulders and shaking me furiously."Who have i seen twice?"
"I don't know," She was looking at me like I was the stupidest person in the world an it made me feel defensive. "I haven't been with you all the time."
"Sasha.." She changed tactics. Her tone was no longer tough and demanding, instead it was the opposite. She was trying to be gentle and i didn't understand why.
Alyssa continued. "Drew said his name was Drew but dad told you it was Justin, what does that tell you?"
"I don't know remember? thats the whole point of meeting up with him tonight, so he can tell me all this stuff" I said pointedly.
"Haven't you thought about the holes in his stories? How an ordinary college student had enough money to send you a lifetimes supple of lucky charms? or why he never showed his face, or why he was always travelling, come on Sasha!"
"What do you want from me?" I answered defeatedly. I wasn't understanding anything at all. If anything, her outburst made me more confused.
Her anger flared up. "Go meet Drew but don't cry to meet me when he breaks your heart."
I threw my hands up in exasperation. "Why would he do that?!"
The silence was tense. Alyssa and I were prone to arguments but this felt different. I knew she wasn't trying to be malicious, if anything, it seemed almost protective. Like she was trying to shield me from the truth.
I spoke before she did. "This ends tonight. I'm going to find out the truth. But before i go, i want to know what it is that has you all worked up. Is he creepy? Did he seem like a fuck-boy who was just leading me on? Why are you so worried all of a sudden?"
"Sasha," Alyssa began slowly, "You know i love you okay? I think you're the prettiest, funniest, smartest person alive and I'm not being biased because half the time you annoy me to the point where i want to rip your hair out."
There it was. Her protective streak.
She sighed before continuing and i could tell from her body language that her anger was slowly dissipating. I was beginning to realize that maybe her bad mood wasn't necessarily aimed at me, but the situation. "But even i'm smart enough to know that you have no chance with him."
I'd be lying if i said that it didn't hurt the slightest bit.
I had known from the beginning that the probability of anything real happening between Drew and I was borderline impossible.
We lived in different countries and had seperate lives.
But It's not like I could help liking him.
And knowing I didn't have a chance didn't make Alyssa's confirmation of having no hope sting any less.
"Please don't go Sash, we can stay in and watch Criminal Minds, go home tomorrow and forget this ever happened and nothing about your life will ever have to change."
"Why would anything change?"
"If i tell you this, then I'd have to explain the Drew secret first, and i will. I promise, if you stay home i'll tell you everything."
I was contemplating her offer when my phone buzzed in my pocket and I slid it out to check my texts.
6332270816: one more hour
6332270816: this is weak but i can't wait to see u
Fuck. What the hell was I going to do?
****
