Let Me Save You

Chapter 33

Great. Here we are again. 

"Emily, what happened? Did you do this on purpose?" The new nurses' aid was taking my blood pressure, also being the one that had to stitch me up again. "Actually, no. I was hoping to get help and all I got was tortured." He sighed and looked at me. "Emily, it could always be worse. Now, how did this happen?" He looked at me with hopeful eyes, praying that I would tell him. "Fine. I'm dating someone at the moment and then my best friend kissed me! That's ridiculous right? I can't like him, he's my best friend! I mean, he's always been there for me and has called me beautiful too many times to count, we also crash together like after we watch movies or after a long day-screw it I know who I love." I sighed heavily, scared to face the truth. "You know,-he started-Bret is in the waiting room if you want to see him. He kept asking me if you were going to be alright when you first got here. He couldn't ride with you in the ambulance, he had someone bring him.  Do you remember that?" He wasn't in the ambulance? I shook my head. "No, I don't really remember anything after I collapsed." 

Well, Bret's out there. Do you want to see him?" I nodded. "Y-yeah. He can come in." The doctor, who I'm pretty sure said his name but I just can't remember, nodded and walked out the door. A few seconds later, in walked in Bret. "Bret, listen I just want to say thank you. I know I'm a real bitch and that you could do so much better. I honestly don't know why you would ever want to be with someone like me. I'm a complete mess. I don't understand. After everything I put you through, you're still there for me. Don't you ever get sick of me?" I took a breath, a little smile crept onto his lips as he looked at me. 

"All the fucking time." I laughed and he came over to the bed. "Listen, I don't want to go back to the treatment center. I want to get better, really I do, it's just, not there. I would be better off going home, having you by my side, like always." He didn't say anything, I knew that he was a little on edge about it. "I guess." I smiled a real smile. I haven't done that in what felt like forever. "Thank you so much!" I pulled him into a hug, letting my head fall in between his neck and shoulder. I don't know if things will be okay, I guess this is the chance I take. Also, I bet you're wondering about my parents? Yeah. They moved away. The seriously left me alone. I was forced to move in with Bret. They had called me and told me to pack my bags. I thought they were going to fly me out with them but instead they abandoned their only kid. What a fucked up life I have. Really though. What kind of sick people just leave their kids behind and not give a fuck? Obviously very, very, sick people.

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Well, this is going to sound as though I am completely insane but I went back to school. I know, crazy right? I wanted to be able and graduate with my class, you know, when the time comes. It meant a lot to me going back but I wasn't expecting the outcome, or maybe I was?

It was like every other Monday. I got up, showered, blah, blah and blah. I arrived and walked through the doors with Bret. Every single pair of eyes were on me. They started to whisper to each other, laugh, and point at me. I knew that it was going to be tough, but I didn't expect it to be this rough just after me arriving. 

I got to my locker and started to place my items away. See, before I left because of my broken leg, I had homework before hand. I have two books and all my binders, basically my backpack was filled. I put everything away, and walked to my homeroom class.

"Why don't you just kill yourself? Oh wait, of course you couldn't even do that right. Good fucking job." Ouch. "Hey whore, I heard that you made Drew have sex with you. Real classy slut." Ugh, stop. "I wouldn't doubt it if she was pregnant and that's why she tried to kill herself. She's so fucking selfish it's disgusting." I've heard enough. "Stop! Half this shit isn't even fucking true! Drew took advantage of me you dumb shit. Also, I'm not fucking pregnant that's probably you. We all know who you like to 'get around'" I quoted with my fingers as the words slipped out of my mouth. The girl that I was talking to, Mackenzie, she was a real slut. She has admitted to having sex more than ten times! The even sadder part, all with different guys. "Shut up, and try and kill yourself again. Please." She scoffed and shooed me away. 

The rest of the day was just like that. Everyone that could bring up my suicide attempt, they took full advantage and did. They just wouldn't stop. While I was taking a test, this one boy lifted up my sleeves, stating, and I do quote, "Good job freak. Go be fucking emo somewhere else. You ruined your fucking body. No one will won't to be with you. No one made you do this to yourself. It was all you. Stop fucking blaming others for something that only you control. They didn't take that blade to your skin, you did. Personally, I think you're a fucking idiot for what you've done. So congratulations, hope you're proud." He placed my sleeves down in anger and then didn't talk to me at all. People that I had never even made eye contact with were saying shit to me. I was getting threats on my phones. Saying that if I couldn't kill myself, they would do it for me. I stopped eating. Not only were people talking about how much I wanted to fucking die, they also found great pleasure on making fat remarks. 

This happened for the next four months. I couldn't escape it. I had lost twenty-five pounds. They would still make remarks about me. I can't take this anymore. Bret has tried to be there for me as much as possible but it just hasen't been working. Maybe I shouldn't have left treatment. I really thought that I could handle this, I guess I was completely mistaken. 

Attempt number two, because I really don't give a shit, here we go.