Diary of a Recovering Idiot

Chapter 18 - Dollars and Sense

        

Age has nothing to do with knowledge but it is expected that as you get older you get wiser. Well to me, that is not true because common sense is not all that common and only if you are placed in a situation that allows you to experience a type of reality can you learn how to handle it, ergo become wiser. From the things that have happened to me over the years, I thought I had a good handle on dealing with life but the truth of the matter was I was a naive as a child about many things. Sad for a woman my age but the truth I used to live was based on fiction.

A major example was when I decided I should keep a better eye on my finances. That decision was like opening a can of worms and finding out they had crawled out the bottom by an unseen hole. Hidden fees, paying out too much money because of high-interest rates and the worst, bad or better yet, non-existent money management was what I found. It was easy to see that age had not made me wiser in this situation, it was all about education, and I needed some, fast.

After all, times are not the best and when you end up running a household on your own you have to really look at where your money is going. The child support helped, but the other things that need to be maintained, for example, the house and the car, have sent me scrambling. My look proved that sadly it was exactly what I was afraid of, very soon I would be having more going out than coming in no matter how I tried to add, subtract and multiply.

Now that I have discovered this problem, I have looked carefully at my money related matters to ensure that I know what is what. Then next, I asked a lot of questions to understand what I didn't know. I realized that the quickest thing people did was to tell you, "I don't know". It is not really because they don't know, its because they can't be bothered to take the time to find out if they don't know the information off the top of their heads. Persistence is the only way you will get what you want and I have it till it's going out of style.

I was determined not to let this money situation beat me, so I sat down and began to really think of ways how I could make extra income that could put me back on solid ground. After thinking, I called the bank to see how much money remained to be paid for the mortgage and the same about the car. I didn't get the information, but I contacted the lawyer and tried to discuss how I could buy out my husband for ownership of the house and see about getting rid of my debts. I needed a number to work with so I pulled one from midair. From first look everything screamed impossible, this can't be done, but I knew I had no choice but to make it work somehow.

That was when I started looking for different ways to make money outside of work because I knew without an extra income I would be doomed. It is not about having money to spend but having "vex money" people. For those of you who don't have a clue what that means, its backup money that you keep with the intention of getting out of a bad situation. Like you go out with someone and you get into a quarrel and you need to make your own way home. In my position, I knew I was going to need it. By chance, I encountered a woman while shopping for possible new tile and ended up in a conversation that turned into an epiphany.

There were the simple things I could do to make things easier and make the money I had last longer. I started by planting a small garden. I choose a small spot to put two or three plants of the things like tomatoes, cucumbers and lettuce, even squash. Then using small empty containers I had around the house I put an assortment of herbs so I would have them fresh when I wanted to cook. It was amazing the amount you spend every week on vegetables and herbs and by doing this I would be able to have a lower food bill. After seeing how this goes I may add sweet potatoes because both my children love them.

I have also sat down and talked to the children about making sure they don't waste anything and that starts with electricity and water and extends as far as it can go. We needed every penny that we had.

Now back to my unexpected meeting with the lady in the tile store. Talking to her turned out to be the very thing I needed. Through our conversation, I was introduced to a networking company and soon afterward I was seeing the kind of extra income I knew I would soon need to eventually get my life in order. That money I kept in a secure place, air-marked for buying out Walter when the time came. Every part of my being was telling me I needed a clean break from him and I intended to get it.

The children have been thinking and listening to all the advice that has been going around, and they have come to me with some money saving ideas of their own. It has now become a contest to see how much can be saved and the difference from the last month's bills goes into savings.

My son takes lunch to school but my daughter didn't but she has made the change so she can save her lunch money to add to the savings kitty. They have taken to hunting up new recipes so that mealtimes would always be interesting but made from items that are on sale. They insist on going to the supermarket with me and with a calculator in hand, make sure that we keep the shopping bills low. I have never seen my kids so determined. This drive gives me joy! They work hard at school and sports but this shows me they know how to think outside the box and are learning to adapt to the challenges life hands them.

Often we are not aware of our options when it comes to money because westill operate under the old belief of our parents that money is the root ofevil. To me, it is the love of money and more often the lack of it that leadsto most of the evil that goes on around us. My children will not grow up withthese false beliefs about money but know that it is not the thing that is bad,but the way that you the individual choose to use it, that is.