The Ballerina & The Devil

Sixty Five. A Profound Sadness

Before you start this chapter check out another beautiful poem by _itz_da_feelz

  A Broken Promise:

He promised to never leave her,
But all he did was cause her emotions to stir.
He made her feel content,
Now there's nothing but a dent.
She thought it would last forever,
Now she is in pure displeasure.
She thought that her broken heart was to be mended,
Now it's nothing but bended.
It was Demi and Aiden,
Now it's either Demi or Aiden.
Once together,
Now both are severed.
Now what once was a whole,
Is now shattered and inside a hole.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

For a long time it felt like time had stopped.

If I was being logical, I knew it hadn't really.

The seconds were still ticking by, of course. Those ticks turned into minutes, and the minutes into hours, and the hours into days. The days came and they left, and eventually they turned into a week, and then into two. The sun came out, and then it departed for the moon to make it's presence known for it's short while, and so on, and so on.

If I was being logical, I knew time hadn't really stopped. Everything was moving just as it always did, but I wasn't in a state of logical thinking. I was in a state of mind. My mind, and in my mind it was a very dark and very scary place. Granted, it had always been pretty dark and scary, but I usually had the luxury of being distracted from that fact by others around me.

Now with virtually no one, all I had left was my mind.

"Demetria Olivia Lawson."

I turned my head slightly to look at my doorway where my father stood with an expression of pure displeasure on his face. I raised my eyebrows in response, not in any particular mood to talk at the moment. Maybe I never would again.

"I've held my tongue for as long as I can, mostly because your mother thinks you need space, but this is ridiculous. You haven't gotten up from that bed in two and a half weeks."

I shrugged and looked up at the ceiling. 

I had nothing better to do with myself. I may as well lay in my bed like the pathetic entity I was.

Dad sighed and walked over to my bed. He motioned for me to make some room which I reluctantly did.

He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to his side, letting out another deep breath. "Demi, I understand you're cut up about your break up with Aid-"

"Don't say his name," I cut him off, my voice cracking from its lack of use. "Don't."

"Okay, okay," he shook his head. "I wont say his name."

I studied the sheets that was covering my body for a while before glancing at him. "How did you know we broke up? I haven't told anybody."

"Because I know my daughter," he shrugged. "I know you like to lock yourself away from everybody whenever you go through a break up."

"Well, it's kind of hard to do that without a door."

"And yet here you are," he gave me a pressing look. "Demi, this is not healthy. It's going onto three weeks, and you're showing no signs of joining society again."

"Because I don't want to join society again," I said. "I just want to lay here and-"

"Waste away?"

"Yes," I nodded. "That's exactly what I want to do.  Just waste away into nothing. I feel like nothing, so I might as well become nothing."

"Just because you feel like nothing doesn't mean you are nothing," he rubbed my arm. "You aren't nothing. You're an amazingly beautiful person, and just because you're disappointed it didn't work out with Ai- him, doesn't change that."