Uzumaki

Eleven

The next morning I head to the clearing to get some training done, I want to work on a Senjutsu that allows me access to one's mind. I summon a few clones and get to work.

I stop writing when I feel a presence behind me, "Shisui. When did you return?" I ask as he approaches me.

"A bit ago. I was on my way home but sensed you over here. What are you up to?" He questions me as he sees the paper balls around me.

"I'm creating a new seal. I need something to help me access someone's memories," I state as I pick the pen back up.

"Why would you need that for?" Shisui sits beside me.

"Eiji asked when I'd know if I found the ones who were responsible for my clan's destruction. So I'm creating a seal that lets me see into their minds," I say and Shisui stays silent.

I look at him when I notice he hasn't spoken, "what is it?"

"When will it be enough? There are the ones who executed the orders, but there are also those who gave the orders, those who came up with the order, and those who approved the order. It's too much to bear Yuki. Half the land is to blame for what has been done and even if they all pay what has been taken from you is gone. You can't get them back. You are going to consume yourself with hate Yuki," I look at Shisui.

"I've always fought to do what has been done to me. Trying to change my ways now seems too late, I'm not sure I want to change," I respond and he nods.

"It's not easy to fix what isn't broken. This has always worked before but know there are other ways to diminish your pain," he speaks softly.

"Great pain blossomed in you when your dearest friend was lost, has your pain diminished? Has your regret and sorrow lessened since then? If not then multiply it by a thousand and if it has double it. That is how a speck of the depth my sorrow runs, simple idealizations for the future do not quench my desire to make others feel as I do."

"Isn't there anyone you'd want to protect from that?" He questions.

"There is no one left for me to want to protect," I speak calmly.

"And your grandparents? What about Minato and Kushina?"

"My grandmother won't be leaving the Leaf so she'll be since. Grandfather is almost eighty and still decided to sign up for war. I think he'll be fine. I pity whoever comes across Minato or Kushina."

He smiles softly, "aren't you afraid of losing what you've gained?"

"What have I gained Shisui? Knowledge of knowing everyone I grow attached to dies?" I pause.

"That now it's even harder to kill me. And if I survive it will be to right the wrongs that have been done to me," I say coldly.

"Don't you think the others think the same? In their eyes, they're justified too, because we killed their own. We bombed and ambushed their comrades so why not get the upper hand too," he states softly.

His words strip me of my anger, there is no justice in this world, "If others think that way so be it. May the best shinobi win."

"Oh, Yuki. No one ever wins in war," I begin to laugh as the tears spill.

"Then maybe I'll die and finally get the peace I've been aching for," I sob and begin wiping the tears.

Shisui hugs me, "It's okay to cry for what has been lost, Yuki."