I'll Always Remember You

Rocky

Rocky's POV

I didn't open Nicki's letter until after Maddie and Riker had taken Riley home. I was shaking, I knew that I would cry. Carefully I broke the seal to the envelope and pulled out my letter.

My only love, Rocky,

As I sit here and write this letter, I realize how badly I want to stay. I want to watch Riley grow up, and watch you be the excellent husband and father you were meant to be. Even now I understand that I have to leave. You may not agree, but I really do have to go.

Remember when we first met? We bumped into each other and you took me out for coffee. I remember you saying "I have a brother named Ross. He's your age. You'd like him."

I let you take me back to your place, and I found out that I really did like Ross, maybe just a little more than liked. Then when Ross and I started dating, I finally realized that you had liked me that entire time.

I also realized that I had always liked you back. You're more than everything I could've ever asked for.

Forever is how long we will be together. Even though I'm leaving, forever doesn't stop.

Riley is there for you. She is my exact representation. Hold her tight, because when you take care of her, when you raise her, you'll realize that she is exactly like me. Don't ask me how I know. It's a secret. Riley will be able to explain when she is older. Don't press her for answers, it will come naturally.

Maddie and Riker are there to help you every step of the way with her. They know exactly what to do, so let them into your life as much as you can.

Don't forget to fall in love again. You have to. You deserve to be happy. More than anyone else in the world. I know that someone can really make you happy.

You're my only love. I'm glad that in the ending of my life, I had you there to love and cherish me. It's been the greatest. You've made my short life sweet. It was beautiful and I could never thank you enough.

I want you to take Riley to the field of flowers. I want you to tell her every story. Bring Ross if you have to. Actually, you take her on your own, then let Ross take her. I want Ross to tell her stories too.

In my jewelry box, there is a heart locket with mine and Riley's picture. Well.... I'm going to put Riley's picture in when she's born.

But after you read this, go home and find it. When she turns 16, give it to her. Riker is giving her one when she turns 13.

Tell her that mommy loves her forever and always.

Remember, a year after we met, when Andrew got in trouble and wasn't allowed to bring me over. My parents were screaming, I was scared, and Riker wasn't home, so you walked over and took me to your house. Now I realize why you were looking at me the way you were. You loved me. Now I realized that I loved you too, I was just too blind to see it.

I wish that now I could go back to that moment and kiss you. I want to tell you that in the future I'll love you.

When you're lonely, look at Riley. She will be there to make you smile, laugh, cry, everything. She will pull every emotion from you. You probably won't even know how to handle it.

Make sure that in all things girl related, she goes to Maddie, Stormie, Rydel, or Amanda. They will be able to help her grow as a young woman. She's going to need them just as much as she will need you and the boys. Teach her to play sports and have fun with life. Don't baby her though.

I'm giving you all these rules and not even focusing on the past like I had hoped. I want you to carry every memory, and know that memories are there to help you get through this. I know that you can. You've always been so strong.

Remember our first dance at our wedding? You made them put on a fast song so that you could spin me around really fast and make me laugh. Then, you switched it to my favorite slow song, Hearts Content, and looked into my eyes romantically. It was the most beautiful day of my life. You made me feel like a princess. You still do. I hope that you can make another girl just as happy as you've made me.

I wish I could write every memory, but I want you to be able to think of them on your own, and my hand hurts.

Every day I want you to think of at least one memory of ours. That'll help you get through it. I love you. I'll love you forever.

I love you so much. I don't want to end this letter, but it has to have an ending. Just know that Riley will tell you about her letters.

I love you. I'll miss you so much. I'm crying.

Good bye, but not forever.

Nicki Grace Lynch <3

I started that the paper in my hands as tears started to spew from my eyes. I started violently shaking. Maddie started calling my phone, and after the fifth time, I answered it.

"Hi." I whispered.

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ROCKY?!?"

"Sitting at home. What about you?"

"WHY DID YOU NOT ANSWER YOUR PHONE?!? IM LITERALLY CRAWLING INTO THE CAR AND DRIVING TO YOUR HOUSE."

"I was crying. Are you by yourself?"

"Yeah. Why were you crying?"

I didn't respond. I knew she was just worked up. A few seconds later it clicked.

"I'm sorry, Rocky."

"It's nobody's fault."

"I'm still sorry. I'm mostly sorry to her. I wish that I could've spent more time with her."

"I'll see when you get here."

I hung up. It could be considered rude, but Maddie knew exactly why I did it. I couldn't handle another breakdown without her here to help me. I would loose it when she got here.

She crashed into the living room 10 minutes later.

"Sorry, Ellington was begging to see Riley so I was at his house when I called you. It's a little farther down the road as you know."

"You're fine."

I gave her a small smile. It's all I had. Her expression became sad, and it was enough to set me over. I fell to my knees and bawled my eyes out. She rushed over and put her arms around me.

"Shhhhh Rocky. I'm going to be here for you, like Riker was there for Nicki. I care so much about her and Riley. Believe it or not, I care about you as well. I'm going to help you get through this."

I cried and cried. She just sat there with me, mumbling assurances. Maddie was the only one who really knew how much I hurt. Nicki had been basically her sister.