Chapter 9: Wishing I Could Hold Her

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Brooklyn’s POV

I continue to go to therapy once a week. Luke might be catching on to my lie of hanging out with my mom, but I’m just not ready for him to know that I’m a freak. I can’t lose him. He fills the holes that Gunnar left. I came up with 50+ things I loved about Gunnar. It helped to remember all of the good stuff about him rather than just the aching feeling that he’s gone.

            “Ok, can you make a list of the top five things you love about Gunnar? 1 being the best.” Dr. Allen asks. I nod and start making the list.

1.    His music

2.    His kindness

3.    His humor

4.    His protectiveness

5.    His shyness

“Good. So now tell me when you have, let’s call them moments, what is it that is your biggest trigger?”

“Music,” I answer quickly. Dr. Allen gives me a knowing look.

“What about music sets you off? Simply hearing it?”

“No, I guess just everything. This guy that I’ve been seeing, he’s a musician. I went over to his house and I saw his band’s instruments and had a moment. I froze, and ran away.” I recount that day.

“Next week I want to start working on that.”

“Alright.” We both stand up as she walks me out into the lobby where my mom is waiting. We silently get in the car.

“Do you wanna get some lunch? We could drive and find a nice place,” she suggests. I nod my head in agreement. We drive for a while before coming to a little café place. My mom pulls the rental car into a spot. Inside we order coffee and a sandwich each. “How is therapy going?”

            “Good. I actually think it’s helping.”

            “I’m glad sweetie. You do seem happier than when we got here. But that’s not only because of therapy, is it?” My mom raises an eyebrow at me.

            “No,” I blush thinking about Luke.

            “Well, go on. Tell me about him!”

            “Ok, well his name is Luke. He is from about an hour away in Sydney. He is incredibly tall and has blonde hair and gorgeous blue eyes. He is super sweet, and funny. Also he is damn attractive!” I ramble.

            “Wow. He seems great. Do I get to meet him?”

            “Um sure, if you want.” My stomach turns at the thought of Luke meeting my mom. I’ve never really brought a guy home before.

            “Well I do. Invite him over for dinner tonight!” I nod and finish my lunch in silence.

            “Can you drop me off here? I want to talk to Luke about tonight!” I ask my mom and she pulls over in front oh his beach house driveway. “See you in a bit!” I wave as I head up to the house.

            “Brooks!” Calum engulfs me in a hug as though he hasn’t seen me in weeks, when it was really just last night.

            “Cal!” I say back, laughing. The other three boys have really grown on me. They are great friends.

            “Luke is downstairs,” he reads my mind. I make no movement. I know what is down there with Luke. “Oh right. I’ll go get him,” Calum gives me a sympathetic smile and disappears downstairs. A second later they are both bounding up the stairs.

            “Hey babe,” Luke’s deep voice greets me. I love when he calls me that it makes my heart flutter.

            “Hey you!” I give him a light kiss. “So I came over because my mom wants to meet you.”

            “Really? Ok, when?” He seems excited.

            “At dinner tonight. Come over around 6!”

            “I’ll be there.” He gives me a few more long kisses before I leave.

            “So what are we having?” I ask my mom as she moves about the kitchen. Mae is perched on a stool flicking through her phone.

            “Just spaghetti. I hope that’s ok?”

            “Perfect. Um so listen I haven’t found the right time to tell him about Gunnar and what happened, so if we could stay away from that topic…”

            “Of course, sweetie. But you’ll have to tell him sometime.” She warns me.

            “I know, I know.” The feeling eating away at my stomach.

Luke’s POV

My hands shake as I knock on the front door of Brooklyn’s beach house.

            “Hey!” she opens the door with a big smile. She has on a white shirt that barley reaches the top of her tight black skirt, revealing a sliver of her stomach when she moves.

            “You look incredible,” I give her a peck on the cheek while she blushes a deep shade of red.

            “Thanks. You too,” I glance down at my outfit. I was really hoping the black skinny jeans, plain white T and red plaid shirt was good enough. Brooklyn laces our fingers together as she leads me towards the kitchen/dining room area.

            “Mom, this is Luke. Luke this is my mom, and my sister Mae.” She makes introductions.

            “It’s really nice to meet you!” I step forward to shake her hand, not sure what exactly to call her. I know Brooklyn’s parents are divorced.

            “You too. Brooklyn won’t stop talking about you!” I watch as she shoots her mom a death glare. I chuckle. “You can just call me Iris.” She gives me a warm smile, making my nerves fade. “So you’re in a band?” Iris asks after we all dish up food. I take a sideways glance at Brooklyn, who is averting her eyes.

            “Yea. We are called 5 Seconds of Summer. We are working on an EP right now.”

            “Impressive. What instrument do you play?” She continues to ask questions. I could talk about my music all day, but I know how Brooklyn gets, and I really don’t want to upset her.

            “Well I play guitar and sing.”

            “What type of music does your band play?” I take another look at Brooklyn who has completely stopped eating and is just staring at her spaghetti. Mae looks upset as well.

            “Um well I would say sort of like pop rock or alternative.”

            “Can you stop, please?” Brooklyn quietly asks her mom.

            “This is for your own good. It can only help.” She reasons.

            “No, it’s not. It just hurts!” her voice rises. She abruptly stands up from the table, racing upstairs.

:( Do you think her mom was right to push her like that? Do you think Lukey will start asking more questions? 

Thank you guys so much for getting this to over 100 reads! I know it's just picking up but stick with me! :) keep voting and commenting!

Also, I am about to leave for two and half weeks in Hawai'i so I will try to update when I can, but it's for school so I'll be pretty busy! xo -Rachel 

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