Infinity .:Joshler:.

18

i woke up covered in sweat and my breathing heavy like i was running for my life. Josh stirred next to me and opened one eye to look at me, "you okay?"

i nodded but my face told a different story, "Ty?". i didn't answer so i laid down on my back again and tried to relax, but when i felt Josh's eyes on me, i felt tears well up in my eyes. i turned to look at him. he propped his head up on his hand and was tracing patterns onto the bedsheets when he stopped and looked back at me. i could tell he was tired and that made me feel worse.

"Tyler, what's wrong." he said quietly when a single tear rolled out of the corner of my eye and landed on the pillow. "i'm sorry," i spoke quietly. "for what?"

"that i'm always waking you up from my nightmares of me dying and then you're tired and then i'm a baby so i cry all the time. i hate it when i cry because you never do and i feel like a kid for crying."

by now i had big, fat tears rolling onto the pillow and down my chin. he took his thumb and wiped them away, "it's okay to cry, everyone does it. they're lying if they don't so don't beat yourself up over it."

i nodded slowly and rubbed my eyes with my palms before scooting closer to Josh so he could put his arms around me. i was close enough to smell the tiniest bit of his cologne left on his nightshirt. Josh hummed quietly and rubbed my back, drawing designs. i stayed awake for a little bit until i felt my eyes droop shut. i didn't know what time it was or if it was a different day yet, but i still fell asleep in his arms.

///

i woke up and remembered that today i get to stay home with Josh all day. alone. i was still in his arms, but his grip wasn't as tight as it was when we fell back asleep. "how'd you sleep?" i heard Josh mumble.

i let out a small laugh, "not good."

"hopefully it'll get better."

i heard my stomach grumble and he chuckled, "what do you want to do today after we eat breakfast?" i shrugged, "i don't know, you pick."

"well we can't go out in public because people are going to wonder what happened to my face so we'll just stay inside, i guess."

i perked up and accidentally hit him in the chin with my head, "sorry!" i shouted as i quickly put my hand under his chin then pulled away to look out the window. snow. my eyes were wide and Josh chuckled from the bed, "you look like a little kid on christmas morning."

"Josh it snowed!" i yelled and he laughed even more. i took my hands away from the blinds and let them close back shut again and turned back towards him, "can we play in the snow today?"

"sure."

i pumped my fist in the air with a cheeky smile. i noticed him rubbing his chin, "i'm really sorry about that, i got excited."

he laughed again, "yeah i can tell, but i forgive you."

i smiled then it quickly changed to confusion, "hey babe?" i asked, "mhm?" he replied.

"what day is it?"

"Thursday."

"what's the date?"

i remember hearing the weather station on tv talking about snow on Thursday.

"uh December 1st, why?" he asked and my eyes widened. i forgot to tell him. today's my birthday. i turn 18 today. Josh's birthday was in June and he could've been in college by now, but he isn't. his parents put him in this grade. i wouldn't know who he is if it wasn't for him being in my grade.

"what's wrong?" he asked, bringing me out of my thoughts and taking me back to reality.

"uh, i forgot to tell you, but today's my birthday."

his eyes were now the ones to go wide, "oh my god."

i gave him a small smile and he started to freak out, "i didn't get you anything!"

"it's fine, your present to me is just you being here."

"but-"

"and us going outside in the snow."

"god damnit, now i feel bad."

"it's fine Josh," i said as i headed over to his bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. i came back out and started to get dressed, grabbing my jacket and beanie before dragging Josh down the stairs with me when he was done in the bathroom. i ate a quick bowl of cereal and i laced up my Doc Martens before running out the door.

i took no time to realize how cold the morning air was and instead jumped right in the snow like a skydiver. i let out a sigh in pain when a chunk of ice hit me on the cheekbone.

"he's very excited about snow," i heard a girl voice say. i turned around and saw it was his sister, Abby, laughing along with him. i rolled over and motioned for him to join but he shook his head, so his sister pushed him out and closed the door behind him. he walked over with a smile and got close enough for me to grab his hand and pull him down next to me. i laughed as he grabbed a handful of snow and shoved it in my face. i did the same back but ripped off his hat and put it on his messy hat hair.

i got up and sprinted down the road as he chased me, "i'm gonna get you Joseph!"

hm, haven't heard that in a while.