Jump. //Jai Courtney Fanfiction

forty-two

Ayla

March 27th:

There was no way I could sleep. I felt wired; High. Like I had just taken every drug in existence. My brain felt like it was floating above my head along with my heart. I'm not even sure what emotions I am feeling. I don't know if it's anything I can put into words. Just attempting to explain it would fall short of what I was actually feeling.

I do know that am so unbelievably overwhelmed with ecstasy that I might explode. Pregnant. Me. Us. Something I never realized would make me feel this way. Something, maybe six or so years ago that I took for granted. Oh yeah, I totally want kids, one day. Yeah, whenever I'm ready!

Something I never thought would happen is that it would effect me so much when it came time to try and have one. Everything in my life, though it didn't come easy I still had to work for it. I busted my ass and got my earnings. All worth it. And then, the one thing that you think would more or less be the easiest thing you can do, you know, making a baby - anyone can do it. Wrong. So wrong. And you know, just thinking that makes me feel awful. There are people out there that have been trying for years to have a baby with no success. It took me six months.

Shit, Ayla. You idiot. You work in womens' health. You know that is totally normal. You have been on birth control your entire life.

Yeah, but does that make it less stressful when you meet tons of people who are getting pregnant unplanned? Who are announcing pregnancies all over social media? Who already have three kids and then announce yet another pregnancy? While you silently and secretly struggle to not burst into tears because it seems so easy for everyone else. No. It doesn't. But, who knows. Maybe I'm just being selfish.

I don't want to think about it anymore. I don't need to. I'm pregnant. We're pregnant. What is making this moment about a million times better? Jai. His face when he told me. His face now that we are both struggling to do anything but scream from the rooftops that we're having a baby.

The tone that's in his voice right now as I sit on the couch across from him and am listening to him explain the short phone call that he received sharing this news. How he never would have guessed in a million years that he would be the one to tell me that we were pregnant.

I am still in shock. In wondrous, glorious shock. Yeah, there is no way I'm going to sleep tonight.

*Flashback*

February 24th:

"I'm bored."

Jai turned and faced me, with his arms crossed over his chest.

"I'm sorry you're bored? Should I do something?" He asked.

Should I do something? Who says that?

"Oh, Ayla, those pictures were gorgeous!" My aunt Kathy said, coming around the corner.

"Thank you!" I responded, instantly looking entertained.

"Your photographer was excellent. Surely the best wedding pictures I've ever seen. Jai, you're a lucky guy to snag this one."

"I sure am. There is no disputing there," he smiled at me.

My mom was having a dinner party, something that she does occasionally. This was one of the bigger ones - at least twenty-five or so people. Her dinner was delicious, the booze is always good - but I was bored. Maybe it's just me being exhausted from work.

"Ayla, your hair looks beautiful today," Karen said as she walked up and started running her hands through it.

"Thanks," I smiled. "Nothing special, I'm getting a little bored with it actually. I'm thinking about, I don't know, maybe dying it or something."