Earth and Wolves

Chapter Twenty-Six

I guess my body knew what I was thinking, so it confirmed the nightmare. I felt the blood trickle down my leg. I knew what that meant. This was a different loss than that of Devon. While the idea of losing my soulmate broke my soul, the loss of my unborn child broke my heart. While Devon was on the ground, and my existence was shattering, I still had one defined thought. I was going to survive, for our baby. 

Ever future I had ever had, was for this baby. We were going to raise him in Spokane. We were going to hold his hand and walk him through life. He was going to be my life. When I found out about him, all my future plans morphed into his future plans. His heartbeat was gone. If I focused, I could almost hear the ghost of what was there. It was almost like it didn't happen, and my heart yearned for that tapping sound again. The flutter of my unborn child's heartbeat.

"Baby?" Devon asked, realizing what happened. "The pack doctor's on his way. Oh Kaitlyn!" I fell into his arms, my heart breaking for the second time today. My tears went from relieved ones, to guilty ones. He never even lived, and never got to call me mommy.

And the worst part is that he's not going to be remembered. It will just be Devon and I here to love his fleeting presence. Time's going to go on. Life is going to go on not knowing about my baby. And I am going to go on living. How can I do that, knowing that my son or daughter isn't? It's devastating. I sobbed, clinging to my fiance. It was like I was floating and watching myself lose the only thing that had me anchored. I was watching myself age, and revert to a child again myself. I knew I was young, and maybe I shouldn't have a child. But I wanted it more than I knew.

I let the pain seep from my chest, until I knew there was no point. I would continue on. And in ten, maybe twenty years, when this aching, battered and bruised heart heals from what tonight did, I can think about having more children. It was going to be okay. I'm going to be okay.

There was suddenly pack members, flowing around us. Katherine was there, helping me stand from where I was sitting in the dirt with Devon. She put a robe around me, and silently pulled me to her car.

"I can recognize a miscarriage, my love." She whispered, helping me into her car. "I'm so sorry baby. Nothing can heal the pain of losing a child. Not time, not more children. Nothing. I wish I could be of more comfort. But take it from me. Soon the feeling will come and go. No it won't stop coming, but it won't last as long. It becomes a scar. A horrible, mangled scar, but much better than a fresh wound. And you are going to continue living. You are going to make a wonderful life for yourself, with that baby as your incentive. You are going to continue living and do amazing things. For that baby. You've already saved the world. Now focus on saving yours." She kissed my forehead, and the tears came back on. Devon got in with me, and my mom got in on the other side. She just pulled me close, and I continued to sob.

"Mommy. I'm so sorry," I whimpered, and she just shook her head.

I rested my head on her lap, barely noticing the pain in my abdomen. There was so much pain in my heart, it was many more times painful than the physical pain of losing my child.

"No, my dear. You are always right. I did nothing in this situation right. I'm just so grateful you are still alive." I could hear the strain in her voice, and I knew she was crying.

"Kaitlyn? The doctor was setting up to see you, rather than him coming to us. So he's just going to confirm what you already know. You're already healing and will probably be nearly done by the  time we get back to the pack house. Hang in there, sweetheart." Katherine said, and I just mumbled an okay.

It was a cruel ride, but we did eventually get there. Devon, picked me up before I could protest, and carried me through the house. I ignored the faces watching me, and prayed that it would all be over soon. He set me down on a medical chair, in the infirmary. He felt my head, and within seconds was back with a cool rag.

"Hello, Kaitlyn. I'm Riley. Just put your feet in the stirrups, and I can tell you how this happened." A young man walked in. I complied, and let my robe fall off. I no longer cared about how people saw me. The only person who could judge my body, was helping me. He didn't care either.

The doctor took his own medical towels to my pelvis, and before I knew it, was checking out what happened.

"This happened from blunt force to your body. Either the car accident, or that vampire threw you around."

I felt numb, and whispered, "The car accident." He didn't succeed in any actual damage to my body.

Devon drew in a sharp breath, and for the first time, I realized he was in pain. He just gave me a small smile, and went back to making sure I was comfortable. The glass that was stuck in his face, thankfully forced its way out as he healed. I had no idea what happened on his end, but I knew that there was at least two more vampires there.

"That's not right...Hang on, I'm going to have to run some tests." I felt panic grip me. What wasn't right? What's wrong with me?

Instead of asking, I let him take the tests. He did a quick ultrasound and drew in a sharp breath. I was getting extremely worried. Instead of informing us, he got blood samples and left the room. Before he did, he told me that I could get dressed. Kathrine left to get some of my clothes from Devon's room.

So we waited. We waited and we waited. I got into my normal clothing and checked the time. It was coming onto three in the morning. My mom asked me about what happened, and I told her most of the story, minus my overkill on Vance and the other vamp. Devon told me about how he succeeded in taking out three vampires himself, and I felt pride swell in my chest a little. The first good emotion of tonight. Devon showed his mom his tattoo and she gushed over it.

Soon we were out of things to talk about, and our mothers insisted we get some sleep. So I climbed onto the hospital bed, and Devon followed suit. He pulled me close, and even though I was stressed and in pain, it wasn't long until I let sleep wash over me.

Finally, my mom shook me awake. Riley was back, and he didn't look happy.

"What, what is it?" I asked, sleepily. Sitting up behind me, Devon spoke up too.

"Just tell us the truth. Don't sugarcoat it." He swung himself over and pulled me with him. We were now both perched on the edge of the bed.

"Okay. You sustained a pretty big injury in that accident. The blunt trauma has actually crushed one of your ovaries, and disconnected them from your fallopian tube. Although your body has righted itself, you no longer have working eggs. Your body has confused itself and can't, or more likely won't give those eggs up to have a potential for pregnancy. You can't have children, Kaitlyn." My world exploded. I couldn't hear a word anyone said. Everything was shaking, and I couldn't focus on anything.

Except one thing. This was it. Prophecy fulfilled.