Babysitter | Calum Hood

29

play that song... it goes with the mood

***

His house loomed over me, casting me in its dark shadow. It was on the verge of summer, but my skin couldn't help but grow goosebumps on each part of my body. I was scared. What other emotions was I supposed to feel? I was going to talk to Calum about our relationship, and honestly with my luck, things could go to complete shit in the matter of two seconds. The last time I was at this house, I got my heart broken and I ended up leaving one of my best friends all alone. Ryder surely wanted me to start dating his brother again, and possibly it was because he truly cared about me, cared about Calum, or cared about the both of us.

I finally made my way up to the door, heart beating erratically in my chest. Is this even a smart thing to do? I mean...I could just text him or something. I'm too nervous about this. It won't end well.

"You can do this, Kendall," I whispered to myself as I stared at the home from the inside of my car. The lights to his bedroom flickered on. "You can't do this, Kendall," I stated, and then all of a sudden a knock on the window of my car causes me to scream.

I turn to my right and there was a lopsidedly smiling Michael Clifford with his flannel and ripped, black jeans. His hair was freshly bleached blonde and his green eyes have never been brighter.

"Is this our thing? Me scaring the shit out of you every time you're alone in the car?" he asked me as I rolled down my window to make my harsh glare evident. He only chuckled at my fear as I reached my arm out of my window to furiously beat him with my hand.

"I hate you," I hissed, putting the car on reverse to back out of the driveway and go home. I can't do this today. Today is not my day. Today is someone else's day.

Before I could leave, Michael shouted for me to wait and I paused my driving to see what he had to say. "Are you here to talk to Calum?" he said and I rolled my eyes. I wasn't here to talk to Calum. I am simply here, so I can leave. I shook my head and continued to plow my way through Michael's feeble attempts to make me stay. "Kendall!" Michael shouted, but I was already too far out of the drive way and too deep in my insecurities to stay.

So, I left, and I didn't even realize Calum walk out of his front door to watch me leave for the second time.

**

The roof has always been my safe haven. It protected me from the horrors of awkward lunch table conversation and talking to other people face to face. It gave me a place to clear my mind when it seemed that all I could do was think.

Think.

That's something I've been doing for quite a while now as I watched the happy graduates of my high school giddily hug each other goodbye. Students were crying, clutching onto their favorite teachers. Mothers were tearing up while taking a couple pictures in their kids cap and gown. Little siblings were running around the courtyard of school, soaking in the glory that came with their youth.

As of me, I left Ashton with my sobbing mother as I sit on the ledge one last time. My fingers graze the cool stone that came with the edge of the world and it felt safe. I felt safe, even if I was on the verge of falling, falling from the cliff of teenage drama into young adulthood.

From here, I could see Ashton's curly hair bouncing up and down as his mother squeezed the life out of him. His younger sister talked to his younger brother, laughing at how their mom began to tear up. I see Lindsay with her family, hugging each of them so tightly. There was Michael, excitedly raising his diploma in the air because to be honest, none of us ever believed he'd actually graduate. Luke, with his special gown for being valedictorian, was being consumed by all of his brothers and his mother.