Ghost In The Snow

Chapter 26: Questions

Trigger warnings: yelling, bruises, hospitals.

My phone was ringing. I picked it up and heard Ray's worried and panicked voice: "Frank, where are you? We were supposed to meet at 12!" "I'm at the hospital", I said with a casual voice to freak him out. "Dear Christ, what have your mother done to you this time?" His voice was squeaky and quiet, so his parents couldn't hear him. "Don't worry, it wasn't her", I said quietly and felt sad. Why did I have to say this. This life. Is it worth living? Yeah, I just gotta stay alive.

"Ah, good... But, but what happened?", Ray asked. I looked around in the little hospital ward. Nurses were walking around calmly, ignoring the people whining and babies crying. "Oh, just a fight. I think Tess got in a fight with the stupid motherfuckers from the school, the old enemies, you know, and yeah... I had to help her, right?" I kept my voice casual and cool. "Is Tess okay?", Ray instantly asked and sounded to panic. "I haven't heard anything yet, but Gerard, he's..." I paused. I chuckled, but felt bad. Very bad. I knew I would regret this. Dear God what have I done...

- - - - - - - - - -

Ouch.

I woke up in a white room. I was lying on my back, staring directly up into the bright light. I looked around. All the clean things almost blinded me at first. I blinked rapidly, getting used to this place. I was at the hospital. Why?

Oh.

Now I remember.

Damn.

I wonder what happened to the other guys. Hopefully Frank didn't get hurt. Or Gerard. Or Mikey? After all I did pass out when he saw what was happening, perhaps he went out to help Gerard and Frank. I hope not. Mikey is not a strong boy, not really. Neither is Gerard, so I hope he didn't get into too much trouble.

I tried to sit up in my hospital bed, but when I used my stomach-muscles, I gasped (which hurt) and fell back down onto my pillow. The pain in my ribcage was unbearable. Again I was just staring at the bright light on the ceiling. I felt a single tear escape my eye. Oh well.

I tried to look down at myself, though it must have looked ugly since I couldn't lift my upper body away from the madras.

Oh fuck.

Why didn't I think of that?

Of course they had removed my clothes, giving me a disgusting white tank top and itchy pajamas pants on instead. And the scars on my arms were visible for anyone to see.

I was lowkey panicking, but the knocking on my door didn't make it any better. I could barely see who it was through the little window next to the door. I could see some black hair. It was probably Gerard.

I hid my arms under the thin blanket and was about to yell "you can come in", but a nurse barged inside, looking down at a folder and a glass of pills in her hands. I felt slightly offended. I thought this was my personal little space, but apparently not.

The nurse placed the folder on a table and poured some pills in a smaller glass. She didn't seem to notice me at all. She walked over to me, still not looking up. "Wake up", she said in a bored voice. "I am awake", I said in a hoarse, raw voice. She didn't even flinch. "Okay. I need you to take these pills." She gave me the glass of pills and a glass of water. She looked at my arm, as I reached for the glasses. She sighed. "I think you're going to stay here for a long time." I felt a shock inside me, and I asked why. She nodded in the direction of my arm. "Two broken ribs and some bruises, you'll stay here for a day. Self harm and psychological problems... I've heard of people, who were here for a year, then moved to other places." She smiled and walked out of the door.