I'm Just the Way the Doctor Made Me 'Completed'

Chapter 13

Frank's POV

"You are probably quite traumatized by the events of this morning." Jaime stated the understatement of the year. "No shit Sherlock. Pardon." I knew swearing was frowned upon and I didn't know if Jaime minded.

"It's fine, I know I'm basically captain obvious but these are just some standard things I have to say, sucks ass am I right?" I would've smiled if I wasn't worried sick about the boy with light brown eyes that shimmered, and dark hair, falling almost to his shoulders.

"Frank." I snapped out of my daydream, "Are you okay?" I rolled my eyes,
"I'm not o-fucking-kay, the boy I kinda like might die and I barely know anything about him." I didn't mean to say I liked him, "I mean uh, I don't like like him." But the damage was done, "Oh my gosh you like Gerard!" Fuck. I sighed, no use trying to back out of this conversation now, "Yeah, I do. Even though I only met him just one yesterday."

"It's almost a forbidden love!" Jaime clapped his hands together, "Can we just get back on track." I shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "Yes of course." He immediately went from funny business to serious business, "How do you feel about Gerard's attempted suicide?"

I was shocked, I had never thought of it as suicide, I just thought of it as just... self harm which is what I'd done before. Cutting and burning. I guess E.D.N.O.S (Eating disorder not otherwise specified) was also a sort of self harm.

"So... do you think Gee was trying to kill himself? After he was trying to get better, he told you about the voices, he told you everything so why would he try to kill himself?" Jaime only shrugged and sighed sadly, "I honestly don't know Frank. This is all very confusing, even to the experts."

"Will he live?" I asked, I couldn't lose him. "I really don't know! I wish I did so I could tell you. But I just don't know. I really don't." I just wanted to cry. Why would he do this? After saying I was beautiful, after saying he wouldn't leave me. After... after he kissed me. I wanted this all to end. I wanted to die so I could be with him.

"Frank, you don't want to do that." I must've said that out loud. "I just don't want to be left alone," my eyes started to water up. 'Don't cry.'

I hot tear slipped out and then, they all did. "I c-can't lose him. He's the o-only one in this place who.. who is f-friendly."
"What about Austin and Patrick?" I had forgotten about them. I tried to stopped crying. But I only wanted Gerard.

"But, I want Gee, I want to hug him and I want him to tell me it's okay. It's not okay. It's not okay this isn't fair." I pounded on the desk angrily and started to cry again.

"Don't cry, Frank. I'm sure they'll get him better." I didn't want to wait, "Can I see him. Can I go to the ER and seen him?" Jaime shrugged. "I dunno, ask Lindsey." I was not going to ask her. I had really bad social anxiety. I would probably have a panic attack if I did.

"Don't make me, ask her for me. I don't want to talk to anyone but you and Gee." Jaime carded is fingers through his hair, sighing, "I guess I could try." I half smiled, maybe I could see him, before... before he maybe died. I wanted answers, I wanted to kiss him, I wanted to hit him, I wanted to gently talk to him soothingly, I wanted to fucking yell at him and ask we he tried to abandon me.

"Ok Frank, it's time for you to go, on my break I'll ask Lindsey, you should eat, you didn't have breakfast." I suddenly felt hungry which was a big thing for me, struggling with and eating disorder I had trained myself not to feel hungry. I decided to eat, for Gee.

"Okay, should I just go to the cafeteria?" He nodded, yeah. Just tell the cooks you didn't eat breakfast. I nodded and left his office so a boy with darker skin and brown wavy hair could enter.

"Why didn't you eat! You need to eat you have to for your body to grow! What do you want? Oatmeal? Cereal? I could make you waffles!" The chef said this quickly I could barely keep up. I ended up with waffles, I remembered how much I used to enjoy them.

"Okay! They'll be done in a few! I'll just heat up three for you!" I was about to protest when he stopped me, "I know you have E.D.N.O.S. so you have to eat enough calories to maintain your weight and maybe gain a few pounds, I don't know what you weigh so don't bother asking." He turned around and started singing,

"Who's gonna listen when you run out of lies?
Who's gonna hear you when your words seem worthless
Who's gonna save you when your on your own?"

He had a good voice, the song was interesting. "What's that song called?" I asked him when he came back with my waffles and syrup. He blushed, "Oh, uh Dancing With a Wolf. Alex and I wrote it along with our other band members."

"Whoa, you're in a band?" Listening to him had completely taken my mind of Gerard. It was better of this way.

"Yeah, eat and I'll tell you more." I nodded and started at my food. "It's called All Time Low. We're from Baltimore, we started it in 2003." He said eagerly, "Wow, are you guys well known?" "Well it's only been a few years, we've released an album called So Wrong It's Right just this past month." I loved music and was engrossed in his story, I'd always wanted to be in a band.

"Frank, Gerard's not going to make it."