I'm Just the Way the Doctor Made Me 'Completed'

Chapter 18

Gerard's POV

This wasn't my fault, rape is never the victims fault. They didn't ask for it, they were forced to do it. No matter what, it's never the victims fault when it comes to rape.

'You're fucking wrong. It's not, it's theirs. I didn't do anything.'

-Exactly, you didn't do anything, you didn't try to fight.

'Yes I did! And that's why they gagged me! I kicked them but it mwas three against one.'

-Stop pretending, it's your fault so stop blaming it on the abusers.

They fucked up right then,

'Abusers, that's what they are. And I hope they're in prison right now for every rape they've done even if it was only mine. No one deserves this, not even me, who deserves everything bad.'

"Gee, I dunno if you can even here me, but I really miss you. It's only been a few days, but it seems like weeks."

It was Frankie again, I needed to wake up.

'How the fuck am I supposed to wake up?'

-You're in a coma.

That was helpful, how the hell are you supposed to wake up from a coma?

-You aren't, because you don't deserve it. You don't deserve anything good. You don't deserve happiness, you don't deserve love, and you sure as hell don't deserve Frank. Precious Frank, who's now suffering from, well, me.

Oh hell no. This was it, this was when I'm taking back the crown. I will never let anyone hurt Frank.

'You listen here you fucking soggy croutons. It I were you, I'd get the fuck out of his head or I swear to God I will beat the fucking shit out of you.

-How will you do that? We are in your head.

Fuck up number two.

'Exactly, my mind, my thoughts, I will bring you down.

I was suddenly in a dark room, or was it even a room? It was a dark, black place. I looked around but I couldn't see anything. I knew where this was, this was my mind this was where I thought of things.

Something stepped out from the dark, I could see the familiar black cloak, this was Them. They were in my mind, and I wasn't afraid. I wasn't afraid to keep on living. I wasn't afraid and I wasn't going to cower and listen to the voices in my head.

It's hand slipped out of It's pocket and drew out a knife, wickedly sharp, and twice as shiny. It glistened as the space started to lighten up slightly, I now saw that it was a wasteland; the space was lightened up by the half moon and a couple thousand stars shining through the thin clouds.

It stepped forward and another appeared next to It, It too held a dagger. They advanced towards me, They'd never take me alive, I wasn't going to run. 'My mind, my rules.' I needed a knife or revolver to fight, suddenly a sword appeared, that was close enough.

I bent down to pick it up and when I looked back up, I was surrounded by Them once again. A table was behind me and they pushed me into it, trying to strap me in, I fought with every bit of me, screaming out that this was my mind and They must obey me.

I swished around my sword, I hit One of Them but It didn't even flinch as it sliced into Its arm. Could They even be killed? Was it possible to kill Them and not destroy myself? Sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind but at what cost? What if I don't even survive? I'm not afraid to keep on living or dying, but what about Frank? What about what he felt about me. Did he even think about me? Did he actually love me?

-Just give up, it'll be quick this time. We'll make sure you're dead and stay dead.

They strapped me in securely, this was it, I was going to die in my own mind. They started to cut again, it wasn't which and painless, it was deep, painful cuts slowly sliced into my pale skin. I wasn't ready to die, there was still so much to say to Frank. Things were better if I stayed.

-Ahah, have you heard the news that you're dead? No one ever had much nice to say, I think they never liked you anyway.

'Dead! I'm dead? How can I be dead, I'm still breathing I'm thinking I'm a live! I need to wake up!'

I struggled against Them but They continued Their operation on me. They were cutting me out of my own skin. I screamed in my head but no one heard. After all, it was just me and Them. Them and also the voices. But the voices didn't have bodies, They were the voices slave/pet things. Henchmen you could say. They did whatever the voices said.

In the distance I heard a long beeping noise, and people were faintly saying things like, "Gerard, wake up" "We're losing him!" "Found a complication in his heart." "I love you!"

I was confused, but I was in so much pain as They slit my wrists so deep, I would bleed out at this rate. At least it would end, just let it end. Let it end.

My vision was becoming blacker by the second. Just let it end. When will it end? I closed my eyes and gave in, darkness enclosed me and the pain soon faded and I felt nothing. Was I dying? Did it matter if I was already dead? This was it, as I felt the dark and numb feeling wash over me I knew this was the end of everything.