Regretting Bokuto | Bokuto x Reader

Chapter Fifteen • February 10th, 2017

••• February 10th, 2016 •••

Here it goes again. Arguing. What is it over this time? You don't want to know. You try to drown them out with the radio that is playing in your room, singing your kitten to sleep.

At first your father was against having the cat but your parents talked it out and he was able to stay. He is fitting in nicely. He had fleas but he got it treated for, that's about as bad as health as he had.

You get a text from Bokuto and seeing his name reminds you of the letter and all that has happened. You and Bokuto have gotten so close over the past months all thanks to the letter. You don't even want to imagine what life would have been like without the letter. It wouldn't have been fun at all.

You realize that you haven't looked at the letter recently. You only like to read two at a time because you don't want to spoil the future. You go over to your desk and grab it out of the drawer.

What you read next, you are forced to sit down down and re-read over and over again to process it.

• February 15th, 2015
Mom and Dad tell you about their divorce on this day. You got angry and screamed at them, not speaking to either of them for two days. This caused them to stay together, unhappily, for another year. Don't do this to them. Let them separate.

They're getting a divorce? Your parents are getting a divorce? Is that why they're arguing? Or is the arguing why they're divorcing? Either way...they're getting a divorce?

You can't help but feel angry. Everyone fights but that doesn't mean you leave them for it. Maybe you changed the future so it doesn't happen! That could be it!

You doubt it though. You haven't done anything to change the relationship of your parents. Why didn't she tell you how to stop them from arguing? Or what it was over so you could help them? They argue all of the time! She could have stopped it! This future for your parents could have been different! It's all her fault! Why wouldn't she tell you!

You leave your kitten in your room with the letter and march down the stairs. You don't care if it's a couple days early, you're doing this now. You can't hold it back, you're angry.

You interrupt their dumb argument, "You're getting a divorce?!"

Both of them immediately stop going back and fourth and turn to you, speechless. They stare at you, wondering how you knew.

"So, you are?"

"(f/n), how did you know?" Your father questions you, baffled.

"It doesn't matter how I know!" You exclaim, "You're going to leave each other because you argue?! You're serious?! You're not even going to try to stay together?!"

"We did try, (f/n)!" You mother exclaims back, taking her anger out on you. "We moved because we thought a change of scenery would help us get along better! We have been going to couple's therapy since we got here! The night you went to that wedding, your father and I decided we were done! He left for your grandparents back in Tokyo for a break and I went to a friend's house to cry! That's why we weren't here!"

Your vision becomes blurred from the tears as your father speaks, "I let you keep the cat because I figured it would help you if you were upset. Maybe you wouldn't feel alone if he was there once we told you. We were going to tell you in a couple days, we just needed the timing right."

You remain silent as a tear glides down your face.

"I'm currently looking for a place around here. We're not leaving you, okay?" Your father assures you.

"(f/n)?" Your mother questions you, a way of asking if you're alright.

"Don't talk to me." You say, wiping tears as you exit out of the front door.

You notice Bokuto walking up to your house. You're too angry and upset to even speak to anyone right now so you walk past him. Although, he grabs onto your wrist. "Hey, where are you going?"

You thrash your wrist out of his grip, "What do you want?"

"I-I came to see (cat/name), like I always do.." Bokuto trails off as he sees your tear stained face, "What happened?"

"You can't come over like you own the place all the time!" You yell at him, "You have to ask before you come over! I can't deal with you all the time!"

"I-I'm sorry..I guess I'll ask beforehand then.." Bokuto says, "But what happened?"

"God! Why do you always ask me that!" You complain. "I'm fine! Okay! Leave me alone! You're always around and inviting me to do things with you! I need time to myself sometimes!"

Bokuto starts to get offended, "I do that because you're my friend! Why are you mad at me!"

"Because you're always lingering around me! It's like you have never heard of personal space! I'm not your girlfriend! Stop clinging to me like you're a lost child! You're eighteen! Act like it for once and leave me alone!"

"I only care for you! That's all!" Bokuto angrily exclaims back. "You act like being with you is a joyride! All you do is baby me!"

"If you don't want to be babied then stop acting like one!"

The two of you remain silent after that, staring at eachother. The tears flow down even more and Bokuto speaks up. "I'm going now. Sort out what's wrong."

You cross your arms as you watch him walk away. God! How dare he! He acts like you're the problem, like he's innocent!

The letter said to not get angry at your parents but that's the only thing you can feel at the moment. You can't keep it in. You have to let it out. You're not going to suppress your feelings for some dumb letter.

The fight with Bokuto might not be in the letter. The only reason he came over was to visit (cat/name). In the future, you hadn't offered to take the cat in. Maybe the cat was a mistake, will you regret this?

It doesn't matter! Who cares about regrets! It's all the letter's fault! All you want to do is scream and cry at the same time. This was too much at once.

You don't feel bad about fighting with Bokuto at all. He needs to learn about personal space since no one seems to have taught him that.

You are fuming.

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[A/N: This book is almost half over ahhhh.]