They Didn't Know (A Minizerk Fanfiction) {HIATUS}

Chapter 21: Back

Simon's POV:

He's coming back today, and I would be lying if I said it wasn't the longest week of my life. I can't wait to see him and get rid of these thoughts properly for a while. The conversation we had really helped me, hearing all that come from his mouth rather than receiving it in a text made me believe everything he said and made me feel that maybe everything would be okay eventually. I just hope he hasn't spent the rest of the week, especially his birthday, worrying about me because even though the thoughts have been there, when I thought about Josh and what he said, I could defeat them. He was my strength, my rock, and I don't know what I'd do without him.

He just text me saying he's about to set off from the airport to Freya's to drop her off, and then he'll be home. I really want to talk to him when he gets back and hug him to say thank you, but I know he'll be tired so I'll let him sleep first before anything else.

*****

I heard the front door open and I knew it was Josh. Who else could it be? I debated not going down to meet him, but why would I do that? He'd probably come straight up to my room to check if I I was okay if I didn't, because he's a caring person like that. And besides, I really want to see him because I've missed him, why would I make myself wait longer?

I reached the bottom of the stairs, and there he was, more tanned than when he left, and looking quite tired, but still as handsome as ever. I could admire him all day, but that would probably be weird. He looked up from the floor and spotted me, probably looking like a weirdo just staring at him, and his lip curled up into a slightly tired smile as he opened his arms, inviting me in for a hug, clearly he still remembered the conversation a few days ago. I didn't hesitate to walk into them.

"Hey." He spoke quietly.

"Hey." I replied softly.

"Miss me?" He asked as he pulled away, I must admit I was sad when he did, but any longer and it would have been weird.

"Maybe just a little." I admitted shyly as he just laughed.

"I want to talk about what happened while I was gone, is that okay with you?" He asked.

"Um yeah, okay. Do you want to go up to your room and I'll help you with your stu..."  I trailed off as I looked behind him, not seeing his suitcase.

"Yeah, British Airways kinda lost it. It ended up on a different flight. That doesn't really matter at the moment though, there's nothing I can do so let's just go up to my room and talk, okay?"

"Okay."

*****

Josh's POV:

When we reached my room, I didn't know how to approach the situation. Do I straight up ask him? Or is there some other way? Just ask him, jeez.

"When I was gone, how bad was it Simon?"

"Honestly?" I nodded. "Pretty bad, and it scared me. I don't want to feel like that but I can't help it. I feel like I'm keeping too much inside and keeping secrets that will just keep building up until I have a day like the one when you text me and I end up breaking down."

"Is this partly to do with not telling the rest of the sidemen that you're gay because you're scared of how they'll react?"

"Yeah. I feel like it's about time I do tell them, but then I don't know how far to go. Like, do I just tell the sidemen or do I tell the rest of our friends too? What about my family? And what about the fans, Josh? When do I tell them?" He was beginning to panic now, his speech and breathing were both speeding up. He was no longer making eye contact with me, instead his focus had now found the floor.

I put my hand on his shoulder to get him to look at me, which made him raise his head quite quickly. "Simon, calm down, okay? You can tell people whenever you're ready, maybe start with the sidemen and then a few other friends, then tell your family later on, when you're ready, and don't even worry about the fans for now."

"If I tell the guys, what's gonna stop them from accidentally blurting it out in a video or making a joke or comment about it which leads to the fans finding out? There's just so many things that could go wrong."

"There's nothing to stop them, that's true, but we can always edit it out of it does happen, or cover it up in some way. Besides, we make enough gay jokes anyway, most the fans will take it as just another joke."

"I guess so." He paused. "Josh, will you be there and support me when I tell them?" He seemed so vulnerable, I don't think I've ever seen him like this. Does he really think, after all this, that I'll just leave him to deal with the others alone?

"Of course I will, just tell me when you're ready or when you're planning to do it, and I'll be there every step of the way." I smiled at him.

"Thank you." He said, hugging me as I hugged back.