Troye's pov
"Mum... Mum?" I call out as I walk through the front door, ready to jump into mama's arms after the long day I've had.
Trudging into the kitchen, I jump back in shock as I spot Mum lying limp down on the floor.
"Mum?" I cry out, running up to her side and shaking her body.
I notice how pale she looks and the blood trickling down her nose. What's happening to her?
"Mommy, mommy wake up!" I yell, scrambling to the telephone on the wall.
I dial up the only number I know, 999, and impatiently hear it ring in my ear. I pull on the cord as far as it will reach, an attempt to try to stay close to Mum, but only being able to sit by her feet.
"Nine nine nine, what's your emergency?" The operator asks.
"My mum is passed out on the floor. She won't-... she won't wake up."
-
"Mum!" I smile as I enter her room, running up to the side of her bed.
She cracks a weak smile, lifting her hand from her chest and placing it on mine. I take her hand instantly, bringing it to my lips and kissing her knuckles.
"How are you?" I ask, watching her every move.
"I'm alright, dear. How are you? How is everything?" Her maternal instincts kick in. Though she can't take care of me anymore, she still cares so, so much about me.
My heart pounds in my chest as I give her a guilty smile.
"...Everything's great, Mum."
Her eyes trail to Dad who's standing by the door.
"Is it?" She asks, her eyes welling with tears.
I immediately give Dad my best pleading puppy eyes, begging him not to say anything.
He shakes his head no, making mine drop, not daring to look mum in the eyes.
"How bad is it?" She questions, squeezing my hand gently.
I keep my head low, not wanting to be a part of this conversation anymore.
"You and I are the only ones he talks to, Laurelle. He shut everyone else out and locked the door on his way." Dad admits, the tears from earlier begging to see the light of day again.
I glance at my mother to see a tear fall down her cheek. I wipe at my eyes and crawl into the hospital bed with her.
"I'm alright, Mommy. I promise." I whisper, resting my head on her shoulder as she wraps her arm around me.
She nods, rubbing my back to keep me calm.
"Shaun, have you looked into getting him into therapy yet?"
I wince at her words, attempting to block out their conversation from here on out.
"Yes, he didn't talk to me for a week when I brought it up. Then when I attempted to trick him into going he locked himself in his room for two days without eating."
"Shaun..."
"I know."
-
I feel like there's oceans between you and me once again.
I sing softly while trying my best to keep my hand steady as I paint. Drawing, I have no problem with. Painting, a liquid substance, it's the worst. I love it though.
Making gentle strokes of blues across my new canvas, I mentally pat myself on the back. Not so bad.
We hide our emotions under the surface and trying to pretend.
"Why can't you open up to her anymore?" Dad said as we got home.
I dip my brush into the paint and return my hand back to the canvas, carving out little clouds in my shades of blue.
"I don't want to talk right now," I had muttered, headed towards my room to go hide away.
"You never want to, Troye! To anyone! You're going to need someone to hold onto when she let's go." He bursts out, making me freeze and turn back to him.
His face drops as he sees the tears already fallen down my cheeks.
"Please don't yell at me," I whisper, his booming voice giving me a headache.
He takes a step forward to come closer and hug me but before he can, I decline, holding a hand up.
"I'm sorry."
I turn back to my room and walk in, locking the door shut behind me.
And now here we are, painting and singing to forget our problems.
I decided against picking up on my portrait, not feeling emotionally energised enough to put my energy into it. Today's been a day, to say the least. Caving into my desires, I sneak a glance at my drawing and let my eyes trail over every detail I've gotten down so far. I sure hope I have this finished in time.
But it feels like there's oceans between you and me.
-
a/n: how are you? (I'm doing pretty well and I hope you are too.)
