Fierce

Chapter 44

Chapter 44
Terminal

Tahimik kong pinapanood si Mommy na kumuha ng kanin upang ilagay sa kaniyang plato. Nakangiti pa siya at hindi bakas sa kaniyang mukha na umiyak siya kanina. Mukhang wala siyang kaproble-problema.

If I didn't hear her conversation with Dad, I wouldn't know that there's something going on between them. Hindi ko malalaman na nagkakaroon na pala ng lamat ang relasyon ng mga magulang ko.

Kahit na narinig ko kaninang sinabi niya kay Daddy na wala siyang pakealam kung malaman ko man ang gulo na nangyayari sa kanilang dalawa, alam kong ayaw niya talagang may malaman ako. Seeing how she acts like she's fine, I know she doesn't want me to have a clue.

As their only daughter, I don't want to just let their relationship break into pieces. That will also break me. Kung may magagawa man ako ay gagawin ko ang lahat para maisalba ang relasyon ng mga magulang ko at para mapanatiling buo ang pamilya ko.

I never experienced on how to have a whole family and yet, it will break without me, feeling the presence of what a family is.

"Aren't you hungry?" Mom asked me and glanced at my empty plate. "Did you and Gael eat outside before you went home?" she asked with a teasing tone.

I deeply sighed before directly looking at Mom. Her smile vanished because of the look I gave her.

"Why did you suddenly come home, Mom?" I asked her.

She let out a sigh before chuckling. "I told you, I want to spend more time with you while your Dad's still finishing his work." she said before looking away from me to eat.

"Why don't you just tell me the truth, Mom?" tanong ko at muling bumalik ang kaniyang tingin sa akin. "Why don't you just tell me that there's something wrong between you and Dad?"

Her eyes slightly widened and I saw a glimpse of fear that passed in her eyes.

"What are you saying, Blair?" she asked me, playing so innocent. "Let's just eat. We'll talk about this later."

"I heard you talking to Dad earlier when I got home, Mom." I admitted.

Bahagyang napaawang naman ang kaniyang labi ngunit agad niya ulit itong tinikom bago bumuntong hininga.

"Mom, if you have a problem, you can always tell me." sabi ko sa kaniya. "We're a family here! Kung ano man ang mangyari sa inyo ni Daddy ay magiging apektado rin ako."

"I'm still not sure about it, Blair!" giit naman ni Mommy at nagsimula nang mamuo ang luha sa kaniyang mga mata. "I don't want to tell you because I'm not yet sure. Ayokong masira ang Daddy mo sa'yo sa isang bagay na hindi naman ako sigurado."

What a selfless love my Mom has for my Dad. Will I be also like her when it comes to loving Gael? Will I also be selfless and drown my self alone just to save him?

"I know you're not in good terms with your Dad." she added. "Ayoko nang dagdagan pa ang kung ano mang hininakit na nararamdaman mo sa Daddy hangga't hindi ko pa napapatunayan na mayroon nga siyang iba."

Kinagat ko naman ang aking ibabang labi at hinilamos ang palad sa aking mukha bago muling tinignan si Mommy.

"Can I ask you something, Mom?" I asked for a permission to say my question and she nodded. "What makes you think that Dad's cheating on you? That he has a mistress?"

"It's very simple, Blair..." she said. "He doesn't love me like how he loved me before."

Mom smiled through her pain and it broke my heart more. It hurts so much...