APRIL FOOLS ≠ calum hood

t u e s d a y , m a r c h 9 t h

DAY 9
IRIS

I threw my hood up with a sigh as I walked to school, attempting to shield myself from the rain. Despite the previous heat, it had cooled down immensely in the last two days. Usually, Calum would pick me up, but we hadn't spoken since Saturday.

It was a bit upsetting, talking to Calum was something I had grown used to despite trying my best to stay away. I was planning on talking to him yesterday, but I stayed home sick.

Sunday was a pretty normal day. Hiding away in my room doing nothing but watching Netflix. But on Monday I woke up feeling like death.

So I took the day off and watched more Netflix, only to return to school today.

I'm not gonna lie, I was a bit nervous to talk to Calum. Last I heard he was crying because he felt bad about what happened. I felt bad too, he just came over to hangout at the wrong time. I was in a really bad mood and already irritated, which he should've understood when he saw me smashing the tv out front with a baseball bat.

I wasn't blaming him for that, he obviously wanted to cheer me up and get my mind off of things. Second one? Accomplished.

Secretly I think I was more upset about the intimate moment, not because it was with Calum, but because I was weak and just gave into it. And I didn't really care it happened, just that I compromised what I had been straining against, and that it could happen again. Or maybe I was just upset because we fought after and ruined it.

Getting used to Calum was already a problem. Getting attached was bad. So something like what happened the other day was this train derailing.

When I walked up to the school, I noticed Calum and his friends in their usual spot, safe from the rain. By now my sweatshirt was soaked, and so was the shirt underneath, and my hair. It was pouring. It was hard to see while I was walking, not to mention how much more difficult the wind was making things.

Shivering, I walked toward their little group and into the area safe from rain just as Charlie noticed me.

I gave her a small wave as I approached, dripping wet from the rain, and tap Calum.

"Iris?" He furrows his eyebrows with a small sigh.

"C-can we talk?" I remove my hood to make eye contact before rubbing my arms to try and warm up.

He nods, putting his hand on the small of my back and leading me away from his friends. He sighs, running a hand through his dry hair and crossing his arms.

"I wanted t-to apologize for freaking out on S-Saturday. I ha-had a fight with my brother before y-you came over about w-what I've been doing lately and why I've been out s-so much so I was in a b-bad mood." I shiver, giving him a small smile. It was freezing. "I was really r-rude to you and I shouldn't ha-have been. A-and I got upset when I w-woke up from my n-nap because I'm scared to get attached to you. To anyone. B-but I took a-all my anger out on y-you and tur-turned a fight with my b-brother into one with you too. I'm s-sorry,"

About halfway through my apology, my teeth had begun to chatter. I was frozen to the core, and sitting out in the rain in wet clothes wasn't helping. But I had to apologize to Calum.

While I was home, I had time to think about how rude I actually was to him. I could've dealt with my anger better, or not blow off his attempts to make me feel better. There were just so many things I could've done differently.

"It's fine, Iris. Honestly. I knew you were upset when I showed up, but I kept pushing you when I shouldn't have. I really appreciate the apology." He smiles, hugging me. He's so warm. "And I wanted to apologize for my outburst. I didn't mean any of it, I was just angry. And I actually like that you get along with my friends. I'm so sorry,"