Ryan Ross is everything. Don't question me.
•••
After exiting the Taco Bell, Josh and Brendon raced each other out to the car.
Josh was panting and slammed his fist on Pete's car in victory.
"Watch it, sir!" Pete warned. "I'll choke the fucking life out of you if you dent my car."
"No offense, babe, but you probably couldn't even reach Josh's throat," Patrick snickered.
"Fuck you, bitches!" Josh yelled back.
"Oh, piss off," Brendon grumbled.
"The poor baby didn't get his way, awww," Josh laughed while Brendon playfully glared at him.
"I will end your life, Dun."
"I wish my life was Dun," Josh said, snapping his fingers at his own pun.
"We can't date anymore, I'm sorry." Tyler put up his hands and reached for the car door handle.
"Noooo, babe! Come back to meh!" Josh fell to his knees (🌚🌚🌚) and pleaded.
"I forgive you, Jijushwa!" Tyler jumped onto Josh.
"Ya-mmph!" Josh shouted as he fell on his back in the middle of the parking lot.
"Hey!" Ryan yelled at the two. "No bum sex in public places!" He scolded like an upset mother.
"Okay, Momma Ross!" Josh giggled.
"tHAT IS FUCKING AMAZING!" Patrick squealed. "MOMMA ROSS IS EVERYTHING!"
"YES, QUEEN!" Pete playfully mocked Patrick's cheery tone.
"I care for all of my children," Ryan crossed his arms. "And so does your father." He pointed to Brendon.
"I ain't have no kids!" Brendon squeaked.
"Dad! Dad! Dad!" Ryan started chanting.
"Dad! Dad! Dad!" Pete and Patrick joined.
"Daddy!-" Tyler tried to join in, but Josh interrupted him.
"hE MIGHT BE YOUR DAD, BUT IM YOUR DADDY!" Josh picked up Tyler, throwing the smaller boy over his shoulder. Josh began to run in circles, making Tyler bounce with every step Josh took.
"HELP....ME!...JIJUSHWA, I....SWEAR!" Tyler gasped out in between squeaks.
Josh finally put Tyler down, making Tyler go cross-eyed and almost fall over.
"I'm soooo fuckin' dizzy, man," Tyler stumbled over his own foot.
"Me after I smoke weed," Brendon laughed at his own, dumb joke.
"That's all the time, babe." Ryan placed a hand on Brendon's shoulder and sighed.
"Oh, come on! That was fucking hilarious!"
"No.....it wasn't, Bren," Patrick said apologetically.
"Fuck all of you shit-terds! I'm hilarious!"
"I know, baby. Just come here." Ryan placed Brendon's head on his chest and stroked his hair sympathetically a few times.
"I'm tired!" Patrick whined.
Ryan quickly shoved Brendon away. "ALRIGHT! MOM IS HERE, BITCHES! OK, NOW, EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING CAR, MOMMA AIN'T PLAYIN' NO FUCKIN' GAMES TODAY!" He rushed everyone in the car.
Pete laughed. "I'll drive!"
"biTCH, I HOPE THE FUCK YOU DO! YOUR FATHER IS DRIVING, GET YOUR ASS IN THE BACKSEAT!"
"But, baaaaabe!" Brendon whined.
"No complaining. My child is tired. Drive. Now."
"Yes, darling," Brendon breathed out and just gave in.
"Much better."
•••
Ryan is a sassy mom.
YOU ARE READING
Cutie (Multiship)
FanficWhen Brendon, being his normal little shit self, gives Pete his best friend's KIK. And his best friend just so happens to be the one and only, adorable Patrick Stump. And once Brendon was added, the dumbest groupchat was formed.
