keep it up ↠ joshler ✔

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( Half Credit to tentacleurie , go follow her and read her books :) )

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"tyler?"

tyler sighed. "what is it, mom?"

"is that... three day old taco bell stuck to your wall?"

"it's not stuck, and it's not three days old, i got it yesterday."

"what is it that i told you about eating in your room?"

"...to do it all the time because you can't stand my constant complaining?"

"you're right about the constant complaining, but i told you that if i caught you with food in your room one more time i was kicking you out."

"cool." tyler said smugly, taking a sip of his juice box before returning to his video game.

"you know what? you're 18! you shouldn't even be here anymore! your father and i were going to let you stay until you got yourself on your feet, but it's clear that's not going to happen anytime soon!"

"wait, so you're actually kicking your own son, who just found a way to be happy," he says, holding up the juice box before continuing, "out? i thought you were being sarcastic!"

"juice is not a suitable replacement for happiness, tyler. and yes, we are."

"oh please. i know you would choose to sit around and drink hi-c rather than go to your boring job all day..." he grumbled.

"sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do to be able to get the good things in life. now i'd recommend packing your things. we'll give you some money, but otherwise you're on your own."

"you're really doing this?" tyler asked one more time.

"get packing!"

with that, she left, shutting the door behind her. tyler's knees cracked as he slowly lifted himself up from the moldy bean bag. this wasn't actually happening, was it?

his parents have always been oblivious to his mental health issues, and to be kicking him out when he was only 18 (and only a mere week after finishing high school) was terrifying to him.

the only solution was that they weren't kicking him out. it was just a test to see if tyler had any faith in them as human beings. they couldn't possibly be serious, and if this was a test, tyler had to fail. he formed a plan quickly in his head. if he seemed mentally unstable or unfit to live on his own, his parents certainly wouldn't let him.

however, it wasn't that he was going to fake being sad or stressed out about the situation, he actually was, but this time, rather than hiding it as usual, he would let it all go on display and talk about it.

he had been horribly depressed for years, yet always bundled it up inside. now he wouldn't. his mom would see just how unstable he was, and she might care about him for once.

tyler anxiously paced around his room for too long of a time before the smells and mess began to lurk into his head.

he needed to get out.

not the way his mom suggested, no way, but simply out of the house for a bit. get some fresh air for once. it had been days since he left his room, after all. he needed to calm down.

tyler sighed at last, stopping and looking around his room, searching for the necessary items he brought everywhere. his phone, his oversized black hoodie, and a pack of cigarettes. his parents had no idea about their son's addiction, much like his depression, but by this point if tyler didn't commit to the smoking at least twice a day, he would have separation anxiety attacks.

"tyler," his dad said as he pushed past, but tyler ignored him and continued out the side door, into the heat of june. the black hoodie certainty didn't help the sweat rolling down his forehead, but he really couldn't care at this point.

with no clue where to go, for tyler was never really one for friends or other humans in general, he decided somewhere cold would be nice. the smell coming from his hoodie really wasn't helping his self image, which he had sculpted over the years to look like 'a badass who didn't need friends'. it worked well, as nobody ever communicated with him. it was a problem in his freshman year, but after a while he enjoyed the solitude. he liked sitting alone at lunch, being avoided by younger students, and having others tell the new students, "oh no, don't go near him" in reference to tyler.

feeling around, he found a five dollar bill stashed in his back pocket. an ice cream or smoothie wouldn't be so bad, he thought, enjoying the plan and recognizing the heat. he knew of a small smoothie shop not far, and it was in walking distance after all. as long as it had his favorite flavor, coconut, he might actually have a few minutes of happiness while forgetting about his mom.

if only i had finished that taco bell, he thought as he started making his way downtown to the shop.