Bucky Barnes' Daughter

Chapter Twenty

A/N: Bold means it's a flashback.

Bucky's POV:

Snowflakes dance to the ground in a merry dance that no one can truly interpret.  In the bleak Siberian Wilderness, you would almost believe that the falling dancers are God's gift to the world.  But, God doesn't exist in this world.  He abandoned his people long ago.  I was proof of that.

"Winter?"  Serenity's sing song voice cuts through to me like a knife through butter.  She smiles as she runs over to me.  "The snowflakes are dancing, aren't they?"  She waits for an explanation.

She's seven now.  It's hard to believe, I've been around her for this long.

"They are happy to see you."  I tell her and she giggles before running off to chase more snowflakes.

Serenity was a ray of sunshine in a dark world.  They've tried to kill her spirit but her suffering only seems to make her more pure, worthy of being saved.

Her name is ironic when you think about the harm thrust upon her. Her name means untroubled, peaceful, calm. Everything that her world is not, yet she embodies her name perfectly.  

She's forgiven me more times than I can count but even now, she comes over and trusts me.

I know I will violate that trust within the next day or so.  It's just the way things are and even we can't break the cycle of abuse that is thrust upon us.

My mind drifts off to another little girl that I tried to save.  I never could save her from all that was wrong with her world but I have been given a second chance with Serenity.  

Sometimes, I forget that Serenity's not her predecessor.  How could I honestly forget when her hair is a dark auburn color compared to the firery red curls of Natalia.  I shouldn't be able to forget, yet I have to correct myself frequently.

"Winter?"  Her voices breaks through to me once again.  Her eyes are not full of wonder like they were moments ago but are instead filled with fear as she stares behind me.

I turn and see the soldiers coming our way.  They were coming for Serenity.  I wouldn't be able to stop them. 

"They want to hurt me."  She takes a small step backwards as if she was going to run.  I didn't want to scare her, but I grabbed her arm.

"If you fight them, it only makes things worse."  I remind her.  She tries to pull away but it was fruitless.  She wouldn't be able to get away and even though the soldiers want to do her harm, allowing her to run would only make things worse.

The soldiers approached within minutes and I handed Serenity over to the man in charge.  He nods my way before taking a screaming Serenity back to the compound. 

Her screams tore at my resolve and I take a step forward, wanting to take her away.  Stop them from doing her more harm.  For causing more nightmares.

But, I don't move another step.  

I came back to the compound hours later, hoping they would be done with Serenity.  I would comfort her as she processed the pain that was coursing through her body.  Maybe, I would be able to make her forget that I handed her over to the very people who caused her the harm.

I wasn't an innocent bystander in all of this.

I searched the compound for her dark curls.  But I couldn't find her.  I spent hours looking through all the rooms and wishing that I would find her behind the next closed door.

I finally found her in the recovery room.  She was drugged out of her mind on drugs that took away her pain.  Her small body was pale against the sheets.  Wires connected her to various machines and tubes connected her arms to the medications that kept her in this state.

I reach for the clipboard at the end of her bed.

"I tried to stop them."  Lev's voice breaks the silence.  "They wouldn't take me instead."

I turn around facing Serenity's twin.  Tears were falling down his cheeks showing me that we hadn't lost him yet.  He still knew who Serenity was.

"We both let her down."  I assure him before reading through her file.  "I need to get her out of here."  I move to remove all the wires but Lev stops me.  "They have two more procedures scheduled.  She can't lose that much bone marrow."

"She'll be in pain when you take her off of the medicine."

"She'll be in more if we don't get her out of here."  I remove the first heart monitor but I didn't have a chance to remove the rest.

A soldier comes into the room and calls for backup.  They wouldn't let me save her.  Instead, I'm dragged away.  They would wipe my memory again, or at least try.  Serenity would find a way to get through to me again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Winter?"  Serenity stands in my open door way.  Tears fall down her cheeks, she's clearly in pain.  "Make the pain stop."  She begs but I'm not her friend anymore.

I grab her by the arm and I drag her through the compound.  She screams and tries to pull away.  She hadn't realized I wasn't her friend anymore.  She wouldn't have come to me if she had known the harsh truth.

I deposited her in the white chamber where they frequently locked her inside.  With a flip of a switch, the room would be devoid of any light.  Darkness was Serenity's second fear.  The first was being alone.  That room would satisfy my needs.

"NO!"  She struggles but couldn't get away.  I held onto her arm tightly, knowing it would bruise in the morning.  "Please, don't do this!" 

But it was no use.

I shove her in the room and I close the door behind her.  She attempts to escape, but after seconds pass, no noise comes from the room.

If I had listened closely enough, I would have heard her quiet sobs as she leaned against the door.