All The Queen's Horses {Myrnin, Morganville Vampires}

Was I Worth It?

Chapter 42 – Was I Worth It?

Gwion played his cat-and-mouse game with Ciro, repeatedly letting him get free, only to strike viciously causing deep lacerations and several bone crushing blows every time he caught him. I wanted Ciro dead, but the violence became too intense even for me, and I buried my head in Myrnin's shoulder. I shuddered to ever imagine myself fighting against Gwion. His destruction was breathtaking and devastating and beautiful, all at the same time.

While Gwion was otherwise engaged, Myrnin removed his shirt, and hastily tucked me into it. I was thankful to finally be somewhat covered. "How did you find me?" I whispered hoarsely.

"Gwion used his contacts to isolate potential states were Ciro might have labs. We selected the nearest state. We did not have the exact location, but once we were inside of the state, I could feel you," his voice broke and dropped off.

"You could feel me?" I whispered with wide eyes. A new realization was slowly dawning on me.

His jaw clenched and his eyes blazed crimson as he confirmed, "Yes, I felt everything he did to you."

No! I was horrified, knowing he had to endure my suffering, in addition to everything else I had already put him through. My fingers trembled as I reached to touch his face. "I'm sorry... You had to feel that.... And..."

My hand dropped in resignation as tears crested my lashes. I couldn't look at him as I mumbled, "You should have left me after what I did at the party."

"Stop that, right this instant!" he hissed.

I looked up in surprise at the anger in his tone.

"Stop presuming that I am so weak, as to not understand that you were not yourself during those moments. I do not blame you..." his voice softened. He locked me in his unfathomable gaze and spoke meaningfully, "Even if you had gone through with it. I would not have liked it, but I never would have blamed you. I don't run when shit gets hard. Did you run from me, every time I wasn't myself?" he pointedly reminded me of the many times he had tried to kill me – and the equal number of times I had begged him not to hate himself for it.

I understood then.

Fresh tears spilled down my cheeks as I smiled at him. He breathed a sigh of relief and pulled me tight. After a long moment, he gathered me in his arms and cradled me against his chest. As he walked toward the cabin, he murmured, "I'm sorry, but I have to know."

I nodded, shuddering in his embrace. When he stepped through the door, he stood perfectly still as he struggled to contain the fury that vibrated through his body. Finally, he calmed down enough to gently set me on my feet. I swayed unsteadily. My head was pounding again and I was incredibly weak. His eyes were tight with concern as he stood with his arms in the air around me, ready to catch me if I fell. I wanted this part over and done with, more than anything, so I gathered all of my strength into my core and murmured, "I'm okay."

He stepped away and pulled his backpack off, asking through clenched teeth, "Which vials did he use?"

I looked around and forced the science part of my brain to think. I pointed to all of the vials I could remember and whispered, "These two... Those three... And that one... And I think he used one of those dart guns to sedate me at the party. He mentioned a substance that could make any vampire, even Gwion, weak."

A low sustained growl emanated from Myrnin's chest as he gathered all of the chemicals, notebooks and finally, Ciro's laptop. When he was finished, he silently gathered me into his arms again and walked out the door.

Gwion was standing casually over Ciro's now-staked body. Ciro was paralyzed but still conscious. His eyes rolled wildly.

"Put me down," I told Myrnin softly.