SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW

Chapter 18

Have you been in a situation wherein you were put on a cloud nine and pulled back in hell? Yung tipong parang kayo na hindi. You kiss and act as lovers but with no legit label? Cliché right? Well I've been there. Done that. And I won't want to be on that middle of uncertainty again. The worst kind of moving on and letting go is the fact that the person wasn't you to own on the very first place. It is a difficult process to find where to put your first step. Paano ka magmomove on kung hindi mo alam kung saan ka magsisimula? How can you make that person slip in your hands if you're not holding her/him though? How can you let someone who came in to your life leave after all the happy memories you two created together? Wishing all that to never happen if it coudn't last at all. That moment when you feel that you are already perfectly fine but then the pain came rushing again and again pulling you back to its first stage of grieving?

She wiped away her tears. Hindi pa ba sapat ang mga taon na lumipas? She thought. Maybe. Dahil kahit ilang taon na ang lumipas, parehong sakit pa rin ang narararamdaman niya. The intensity of pain remains the same, the years didn't do anything to even make it lesser. Sa tingin niya ay mas nasasaktan pa siya ngayon sa mga pinagsasasabi ng binata.

"I'll go back to my room now." Isang buntong hininga ang pinakawalan niya bago nagpaalam.

"No! We need to talk." May diin sa pagkakasabi nito ng mga salitang iyon.

"We have nothing to talk about!" She said. Kung puro lang naman kasinungalingan ang sasabihin nito ay ayaw niya ng magsayang pa ng oras para rito.

"How did he died?" Reston said out of desperation. Hinawakan nito ang kanang braso niya. His eyes were bloodshot. Mixed emotions were seen on them.

"You don't have to know." She answered back casually. She felt his grip tightened a little more. "Ouch! Get off me!" She complained. Parang natauhan naman ito at binitawan siya.

"Please, Sid, I want to know..." he pleaded.

"You really want to know huh? Then shoot. I killed him Reston! I killed the one who have nothing to do but loved me unconditionally! I killed my brother! Ano? Is that enough?! If it is, then I need to go!" Tinalikuran niya ito at akmang maglalakad palayo ng hapitin siya nito sa bewang. In one swift motion, he carried her on her shoulder. She wiggled her body to destruct him. He walks toward the water and instantly, she felt afraid on what's runnning into his mind. And her instinct didn't betrayed her as he threw her on the water. Hanggang dibdib niya na ang tubig niyon.

"Damn you!" She cursed as panic hit her own system. She trembled in fear. She's about to take a swim back to the shore when she felt his arms on the small of her waist. He hold her tight as he swam deeper on the dark sea water. Mahinang banaag mula sa lamp post ang umaabot roon. "Please Res, bring me back to the shore now." She now begged along with her own sobs.

Sa takot niya ay humigpit ang kapit niya sa leeg nito ng mas lalo pa itong lumangoy palayo sa dalampasigan. She closed her eyes to ease the fear. Hindi niya namalayang dinala siya ni Reston sa isa sa mga nipa hut katulad noong ginamit nila noong isang araw. He pushed her to sit on the floating cottage while he remained on the water.

"I know you didn't want what happened Sid. And from this night onwards, I want you to take away all your fears." He  said as he looked up at her.

Umiling siya rito. Tilting her head to the side avoiding his stares. "I'm the main reason why he died."

"Tito Alfred said during the wake it was a car accident. And the news told it too. How come-" confusion is evident on his face as well as she. She'll going to ask her Dad if it is true, that he was really around during his Kuya Martin's wake.

"It was." She answered acting uninterested but her heart basically constrict at the thought.

"Then paano?" He asked back.